


Selfless

by MuscleBunni



Category: GOT7, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Abuse, Angst, Child Abuse, Depression, Eating Disorders, Fluff, Getting Together, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Jeon Jungkook is Whipped, Jeon Jungkook-centric, M/M, Minor Violence, Miscommunication, OT7, Polyamory, Slow Burn, Suicide Attempt, he loves his hyungs so much
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-04
Updated: 2018-10-02
Packaged: 2019-07-06 20:59:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 58,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15894045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MuscleBunni/pseuds/MuscleBunni
Summary: Jungkook always cares too much for people he's never met, but when 6 boys come into his life he really doesn't have a choice but to help them.Falling in love however,wasn't really apart of his plan...





	1. Chapter 1

He meets Taehyung in the fall.

 

Jungkook hurriedly heading to school, quite literally is barreled into by another boy. Jungkook looks up in surprise and confusion, before being met with the most beautiful smile he’s ever seen. It’s boxy and wide as the boy stands up and apologizes. He walks with Jungkook the rest of the way, and continues talking. Jungkook can’t even get a breath in with how much Taehyung talks, but Jungkook at the same time can’t help but enjoy it.

 

Tae starts walking him to school everyday, and everytime Tae will talk and talk and talk. Taehyung’s ramblings consist of weird animals he’s seen, what it’s like to be a cloud, or even philosophical stuff like what he thinks his place is in the universe. Jungkook always loves hearing the boy ramble on their way to school.

 

Taehyung finally asks him one day, “Jungkook-ah, I realized you never really talk about yourself.”

 

Jungkook is surprised by the change in conversation, “Well no offense hyung but you do tend to talk quite a lot.”

 

“Aish you should’ve told me!” Taehyung tells the boy.

 

Jungkook simply shakes his head, “I like hearing you ramble its... its nice.”

 

Taehyung stares at him for a moment before that beautiful smile is back with fervor. He throws an arm around Jungkook and demands Jungkook tell him about himself. Jungkook however doesn’t think there is anything to share.

 

“Aw come on you have to have at least one thing special about you,” Taehyung wines one day.

 

Jungkook huffs out a laugh and shrugs, “I don’t know what to tell you Tae I’m not that interesting.”

 

Tae pouts, “Well can you at least tell me your hobbies? Or are those not interesting either?”

 

Jungkook rolls his eyes, “It’s not much but I love to sing and dance. I used to do it for my grandmother before she passed, but I also love art especially video editing.”

 

Taehyung perks up at this, “See? Now we're getting somewhere!”

 

Jungkook simply laughs and the two continue their meaningless conversation. Where Jungkook lacks in social skills, Tae exceeds in them. It honestly balances them out pretty well. With Tae Jungkook can drop the honorifics, laugh just a bit more loudly, and go to social events. In return he helps Tae academically. He helps calm the boy’s inner demons and chase away the nightmares.

 

After all, Jungkook isn’t stupid.

 

He notices everything. Jungkook being so quiet and timid becomes observant of the world and the people who live here. He notices the bruises that color Taehyung’s skin purple and black. He sees the hollow look in his eyes when Taehyung sees a happy family, and how kind they are to each other. Jungkook sees these emotions and his heart aches for the boy.

 

Jungkook knows Taehyung will never come to him about it, and will also deny everything. With no idea on how to help he researches abuse and how to help, he researches how to bandage wounds, and he researches depression and what it could lead to.

 

So Jungkook decides screw it, and helps Taehyung in his own way. He starts bringing bandages, and wraps up Tae’s arm listening to the same excuse every time.

 

“Oh, I just fell sorry.”

 

Jungkook hates those words.

 

Regardless Jungkook helps Taehyung in the shadows. He slowly chips away at his own heart, giving the boy as much of it as he can. He holds Taehyung close, whispers soft words of comfort and care, and does everything to make him smile on rainy days.

 

Taehyung isn’t stupid either. He knows what Jungkook is doing, and he couldn’t be more grateful. Taehyung still struggles in telling Jungkook what occurs at home, still afraid about what could happen. However he slowly starts leaning on the boy whose so quiet, but has the kindest eyes and the softest hugs.

 

“Hey, Jungkook?” Taehyung asks one day.

 

Jungkook looks to Taehyung, “What is it Tae?”

 

He looks down getting this sad look in his eyes, “He hit her last night..”

 

Jungkook pauses alarmed, “What? Tae who are you talking about?”

 

Tae looks at Jungkook is eyes swimming with unshed tears, and his lip wobbling, “My sister, Kook, he, he hit my sister.”

 

Jungkook’s eyes widen because not only did Taehyung actually, for once, talk about the abuse, but also in horror for the boy and his sister. Jungkook slowly reaches out and cups Taehyung’s face in his hands. Tae shuts his eyes, the tears leaking out and down his face. Jungkook feels a whine try and escape his throat, but he stays quiet leaning into Taehyung. He wraps his whole body around the boy hoping it’ll be enough to protect him.

 

“I, I w-wanna leave _so bad_ ,” he whispers, “but if I do, he’ll just hurt her _next_.”

 

Jungkook feels his eyes water, and he wishes he could do something. He has no idea how to stop the abuse though, he knows that if the police found out they would take both of them away. Taehyung couldn’t handle being forced away, and he fears his sister will be taken from him too.

 

Jungkook continues to cradle Taehyung in his arms, and whisper comforting words in hopes to ease the pain. Jungkook will then later cry alone at night wishing he could help his friend more.

 

_It’s then he decides when Tae and his sister get out he’s going to punch that bastard right in the face._

 

The two boys continue throughout the year like so, until one day Taehyung brings someone to their spot.

Jungkook looks at the boy behind Taehyung curiously and gives said boy a confused look. Taehyung has his boxy smile on, and his eyes seem to be lit with stars today. ~~Jungkook can’t help but think it’s beautiful.~~

“Jungkook I found another friend!” He exclaims excitedly.

The boy finally looks up, and Jungkook feels his stomach jump up to his throat.

_He’s breathtaking._

The boy has the softest face he’s ever seen, and his eyes hold wonder and light. He looks curiously at Jungkook but also worried. Jungkook can tell he’s nervous so he gives the boy his bunny smile in hopes of easing the nerves.

The boy blinks before grinning at him.

“You were right Tae he is like a bunny,” the boy said giggling.

Taehyung laughs and finally introduces the boy, “Jungkook? I want you to meet our newest recruit, Park Jimin.”

Jungkook rolls his eyes at “recruit”, but smiles nonetheless. Jimin is very kind and soft spoken at first. It takes him a while to really open up to the two, but with Taehyung in the mix he starts to talk more.

He also comes up with the ~~best~~ dumbest nicknames.

“Kookie!”

Said boy looked up just in time to catch a person slamming into him. Jimin looks up to him grinning widely, and Jungkook can’t help but return the same smile. Taehyung and Jungkook learn that Jimin is very affectionate, and requires a lot of attention too. However, neither of them mind giving this to the boy.

“Tae-Tae! Stop ignoring me!!” Jimin whined.

Taehyung simply would grin and refuse to acknowledge Jimin, teasing the boy ruthlessly.

“Hyung you’re forgetting I’m here too,” Jungkook says smiling.

He regrets speaking when Jimin’s eyes latch on to him like a predator and it’s prey. Jimin’s hugs are always the best, even if they do crush you. They can be suffocating at times, but the result is always the same. The fuzzy feeling in the pit of Jungkook’s stomach everytime Jimin will give him a tight hug or hold his hand.

Jimin sees first hand one day about Taehyung’s bruises. Jimin doesn’t ask questions like Jungkook expects him to. Instead he simply kisses each bruise and holds Taehyung close telling the boy how much he loves and cares for him. The two always agree to help Tae out on days like these, and it becomes easier for Taehyung to trust them both because of this.

“Hey Kookie? Do you think Tae-Tae is okay?” Jimin asks one day.

Taehyung isn’t present for school that day so it’s just the two of them. Taehyung doesn’t miss school often, but when he does it’s normally because of his father.

Jungkook’s throat tightens, “I don’t know Jiminie.”

The boy pouts wanting a happier response, but he leans against Jungkook relaxing.

“Jungkook-ah you, you don’t really talk about yourself do you?”

He look down to Jimin surprised, and sees the boy looking at him curiously. Jungkook remembers when Taehyung brought this up before, and again can’t find a real response to that.

“Well hyung, there isn’t much to tell,” he says softly.

Jimin frowns, “You only ever call me hyung when you want me to do something.”

Jungkook can’t help but laugh, because well he isn’t wrong.

“I’m really not that interesting hyung. I like to draw and take photos of the world, but not a lot of things happen in my life,” he tells him.

Jimin nods seemingly satisfied, “I’m glad you’re okay Jungkook. I don’t know if I can handle the pain of knowing both of my friends are being hurt.”

It’s the first time _Jimin_ has openly talked about the abuse, and Jungkook hums wrapping an arm around the older boy.

“I know it’s scary Jiminie, but Tae will be okay,” Jungkook says.

Jimin nods, “I know, but I… I can’t help but worry.”

Jimin helps Taehyung a lot, always offering the best smiles and the softest hugs. He buys the younger boys snacks and in public tells them to call him hyung. Jungkook doesn’t sometimes deciding he’d rather tease the boy instead, but seeing Jimin’s face scrunch up is always funny.

Despite all of this Jungkook sees Jimin struggling too.

He notices how Jimin’s eyes get dimmer throughout the weeks. He starts to see how Jimin’s cheeks hollow. The worst is when Jungkook notices how Jimin’s stomach starts to cave inward.

Jungkook researches again, terrified for his other best friend. He research brings him to anorexia and bulimia, and his chest tightens upon reading what they can do to a person. Jungkook knows Jimin will deny everything so again, just like with Tae. He starts to hold the boy that much tighter, and tells him he’s beautiful not caring if it’s embarrassing.

“Hyung, you look really nice today!”

“Jiminie, you should eat more.”

“Hyung doesn’t need to change for anyone!”

Jimin knows what Jungkook is doing, and he can’t help but feel a little better everyday. Jungkook practically tells Jimin he’s pretty _every single day_ , and soon enough Tae catches on and starts as well. Taehyung and Jungkook help him as much as he helps them. They hold him close, tell him they love him, and Jungkook always brings extra food just in case.

He starts to feed Jimin himself, and will follow the boy to the bathroom just in case. It takes Jimin a while to accept the praise. It takes even longer for him to stop shoving his fingers down his throat. Slowly but surely Jimin gets better. There are still bad days, and Jungkook being so observant always knows how to help. There are even days when Tae and Jimin are both struggling at the same time, so Jungkook pulls them to his side and cuddles them both until they relax.

The boys form an unstoppable trio, and throughout high school Jungkook ends up having the best years of his life. Jungkook still doesn’t understand why his stomach flips every time Taehyung smiles at him, or why Jimin’s touches make his face heat up. Despite this he hangs on and enjoys his time with them to the fullest.

There’s one night, when Taehyung is beaten badly, and Jimin’s eyes are dead to the world. Jungkook opens his doors for them both, he wraps each of them in a blanket, and puts on a movie. There are no words spoken, but slowly they relax and scoot closer to the boy who is always so giving. Tae starts laughing with the movie, and Jimin cuddles Jungkook softly.

“Kookie, thank you so much,” Jimin tells him in the dark later that night.

Jungkook shakes his head, “I’d do anything for you two hyung.”

“Which is why were so so grateful Jungkook-ah,” Taehyung whispers.

There’s a moment there. When Jimin gives him the best smile and cards his hand through his hair. When Taehyung holds him tight, and looks at Jungkook with so much happiness and love. It’s there Jungkook has an epiphany.

_He realizes that he’s in love._

 

Those happy moments go on for two more years, and then the boys get ready to graduate and go to University. Jungkook can’t help but feel his heart get a little bit weaker as the days go by. He knows the two will stay in contact, and he also knows that their University is only a few minutes away. Despite this he feels upset because they won’t be there with him 24/7. Maybe that’s a little codependent, but they’re Jungkook’s only friends.

When they graduate Jungkook is in the crowd screaming his lungs out along with Taehyung’s younger sister, and Jimin’s family. When he sees the smiles on his best friends faces, he finally lets go. He will still see them practically everyday, and Taehyung’s sister will be there too if he gets too lonely at school.

Jungkook’s next year take the longest. True to their word Taehyung and Jimin come by everyday. Sometimes picking him up from school, other times showing up at his house at the most random times. Jungkook feels that love in his heart increase everyday, and has no idea on what to do about it. Jimin and Taehyung take pieces of his heart, and he couldn’t be more willing.

It’s during those times that Jimin and Taehyung start talking about some older boys. Jimin speaks of a boy in his dance class who moves like wind but hard like rock. Taehyung talks about about a tall boy who questions his professor on everything, too smart for his own good. Jungkook loves hearing the stories, and encourages the boys to talk to them.

It’s then that they meet two more boys. Apparently Jimin’s dance idol and Taehyung’s smart alec know each other and have 2 other good friends. Jungkook loves hearing about the boys, and feels as if he knows them as well.

He learns that Seokjin is the oldest, and has the prettiest face. However he would rather be cooking than modeling it seems. He hears about the stupid dad jokes he makes, and how despite being the oldest he can act like the youngsters as well.

Yoongi, Taehyung tells him, is a mystery. He scowls a lot and stays quiet. Taehyung at first is afraid of him, but it’s Jimin who helps Yoongi get acquainted to the younger two. Yoongi wants to produce music, he’s constantly working on a new track, and also raps during his free time.

##### Hoseok is Jimin’s idol. He’s the top dancer in their class, and Jimin squeals about how he actually asked Jimin of all people to perform with him. ~~Which Jungkook has to remind him of course he would ask Jimin~~. Hoseok or Hobi is like sunshine, and loves the younger two to death.

And finally Namjoon, Taehyung’s substitute professor. Namjoon is tall, collected, and extremely smart. He’s labeled as a genius and has the IQ to prove it. Despite this he also manages to be the “God of destruction” always breaking things too easily. He also raps alongside with Yoongi and loves making music too.

Jungkook continuously asks to meet the four boys, but Taehyung and Jimin always tease him saying he needs to get out there first. Jungkook takes this as a challenge and starts studying like crazy. Jungkook becomes number one in his class and starts taking classes in the summer as well hoping to graduate early. He succeeds in his goal. ~~Even though math _still_ doesn’t make sense to him. ~~ His teachers give him proud smiles, and tell him to do good in the world.

On the day of his graduation he hears screams of his name. He looks over and sees Taehyung and Jimin along side with their families. He feels his eyes water and his lips curve up in a smile.

Jungkook rushes towards them and practically tackles the two to the floor. Taehyung and Jimin give him the sweetest laughs and Jungkook couldn't be happier.

“Hey Kookie?” Jimin asks.

Jungkook turns to the boy, “What is it hyung?”

“Where are your parents?” He asks.

Jungkook goes silent for a moment before giving him a melancholy look, “They were busy.”

Taehyung’s brows furrow, “Busy? Kookie this is your graduation they should be here.”

Jungkook shakes his head, “They have to work Tae, they have to pay for my college somehow.”

The two boys look at their youngest thoughtfully. They realize that Jungkook never talks about his family always stating there's nothing interesting.

Perhaps what he truly meant was that there's never anything there.

Jungkook watches the two give him pitiful looks and Jungkook decides he hates it, hates how their eyes scrunch up and lips turn down. So he grabs their hands and smiles.

“I don't need my parents, I really don't. I have the two of you and that has _always_ been enough,” he tells them.

Jimin takes a breath in and pulls Jungkook in for a tight hug. Taehyung follows wrapping his arms around both of them. Jungkook realizes they're trying to comfort him, but in all honesty he really was okay. In fact with his two hyungs staying beside him, he knew he'd always be okay.

The boys practically live with Jungkook after this. They never realized how often Jungkook was left alone. Once the two boys realized this they make sure Jungkook is never alone. There are nights when Taehyung needs to stay with his sister at home, but most of the time he just brings her too. Jungkook always smiles thoughtfully, because honestly he’s okay. He has been okay for years.

So maybe his parents were never around. His grandmother was. She raised him and taught him how to care for himself because she knew when she passed he’d be on his own. She taught him love and life, and how to cherish the people he meets. When she passes Jungkook is a mess. It’s one of those rare times his parents touch him. Hug him even.

Then just like that they’re gone. Jungkook doesn’t care though he doesn’t know how because they are never around to see him. They come home late at night and leave early in the morning. Jungkook sometimes even forgets what they look like due to them never seeing him, but they take care of him nonetheless. They give him a roof, money for food, and money for school.

Jungkook never had a hard life really. Maybe there are many things wrong with his childhood, but he learned early that the people in his past don’t matter. What matters are the people he has now, and Jungkook has some of the best friends in the world.

 

Finally, Taehyung and Jimin introduce him to Seokjin. He remembers hearing the boys talk about how pretty Seokjin is, but they do him no justice. When the older man sits down, Jungkook loses the ability to speak. Jimin is pretty, beautiful even, but something about Seokjin has Jungkook stumbling over words and trying to stop his face beating red.

 

Seokjin can tell Jungkook is struggling, so he makes conversation. Jungkook finds himself in a similar spot back to when he listened to Tae talk and talk. Seokjin tries to include Jungkook in making small jokes, but Jungkook is still terrified. He wants to make a good impression, but Seokjin is so handsome and how is he supposed to interact with a god?

 

Jungkook decides it’s hopeless until later into the night.

 

They are waiting for their food when a lady drops a plate full of eggs. Jungkook goes to help, and sees Seokjin’s mouth twitching. The others stare at him in horror starting to cover his mouth until-

 

“EGGSCUSE ME! Are you alright?” He practically exclaims.

 

Jungkook stares at the older man slightly terrified because what? What did he just say? The lady also looks to Seokjin so very confused on what is happening. Seokjin however ignores it all by laughing at his terrible joke. Jungkook, after stressing out about meeting this man, bursts out laughing too because somehow Seokjin finally cut through the tension with a dad joke? Is he serious?

 

It’s then that Jungkook calms down, and realizes Seokjin is actually very normal. He tells him to call him Jin-hyung, and lets Jungkook know he’s always welcome at his cafe. Jungkook learns about Jin’s cafe and how he abandoned everything to create it. Jin is a fantastic cook, and Jungkook is curious to try it.

 

“Jungkook-ah, what are you doing here?”

 

Jungkook looks up and sees Seokjin standing above him with an eyebrow raised. Jungkook smiles sheepishly. He’s been coming to Jin’s cafe for weeks, but never had the guts to say hello.

 

“Sorry hyung, I just was trying to draw,” he tells him.

 

Jin smiles, “Oh? And what were you drawing? My good looks?”

 

Jungkook rolls his eyes, “You’re only partially right.”

 

He shows Jin his sketch of the cafe. You can see Jin in the back talking to a customer, and the glass case that hold the food. Jin sucks in a breath.

 

“Kookie, that’s amazing,” he says.

 

Jungkook feels his face heat up slightly, “It’s just a sketch Jin-hyung… This place is really nice to relax, and just… chill I guess.”

 

Jin laughs, “I’m glad, well I’ll let you get back to your ‘chilling’.”

 

Jungkook smiles in response and continues drawing. He finds himself drawn to Jin’s features, his strong jaw, soft eyes, and beautiful smile. Jin is Jungkook’s favorite to draw. Jungkook starts another sketch of just Jin and his cafe. Jungkook focuses on the feeling rather than Jin’s features, and comes up with a sketch he’s truly proud of.

 

He manages to capture the calm feelings of the cafe, but also show the warmth it gives off. He captures the smiles and the light that flows out of Jin, and how it fills the cafe with flowers.

 

Jungkook becomes a regular at Jin’s cafe and Jin always welcomes him with a warm smile. There are nights Jin asks him to stay later, and he always claims it’s to use Jungkook’s muscles for help.

 

Jungkook knows the man just doesn’t want to be alone..

 

So Jungkook starts staying late, he helps pick up, clean the dishes, and just listen to Jin ramble.

 

“And then this lady just stormed to the front! She cut in front of all these people and didn’t even care! She acted all high and mighty when I told her to go back to the end of the line. She made it seem like she was the queen or something!” Jin exclaims washing the plates harshly.

 

Jungkook chuckles, “I saw hyung, I was right there you know.”

 

Jin gives him a look, flicking water on him, “Oi your hyung is talking brat.”

 

Jungkook laughs and Jin chuckles in response. Jin is always very soft with the maknaes, after all he acts like them sometimes too. Jin is bubbly, eccentric, and full of smiles. He makes the world shine that much brighter.

 

Despite this Jungkook knows Jin and his demons. Jin’s demons come in the form of his family. They visit every once in a while, and everytime Jin shuts down. Jungkook sees it happen every time, first Jin’s eyes grow cold, his smile disappears, and his shoulders tighten in nervousness.

 

Jin’s family was never respectful towards his choice in career. They expected him to take over their business, and help his family. Jin wasn’t their puppet though. He decided his own future even if it meant losing his family's love and respect.

 

They come in to taunt him sometimes, other times they sit and watch him. Jin knows they are just trying to throw him off. It just hurts him no matter how _hard_ he tries to ignore them.

 

And that’s where Jungkook comes in.

 

Jungkook has always acted as a barrier for Jimin and Taehyung, always trying to protect them from the world and it’s horrors. He can’t help but do the same for Jin. Jungkook after going through high school develops muscles, and height Jimin envys. Sometimes when his family comes in Jungkook gives them the dirtiest look possible and sizes himself up. He isn’t afraid of them. He never will be.

 

They stop talking to Jin once they realize he has a guard dog, but they do show up every once in a while. When this happens Jungkook acts just a little bit nicer, hugs Jin a bit tighter, and scowls even more at his family.

 

Jungkook becomes Jin’s food tester, and Jungkook couldn’t be happier. Jin spoils him rotten, and the maknae senses that somehow fate is giving him back the times he never got with his parents. Jin is strong despite his dorky personality. He gives the best winks, and blows kisses to each customer as a goodbye.

 

Jungkook loves spending time with Jin, he’s able to relax and not think about how much he loves the other two boys. Jin is his oasis, and Jungkook would do anything to protect it.

 

“Where’s your guard dog, Jin?”

 

Jungkook is behind the counter crouched down to grab napkins for someone. He knows the taunting voice of Jin’s brother anywhere. Jin’s shoulders tighten, and his hands clench. Jungkook knows he has the strength to _pummel_ the man, but can’t in fear he’ll look bad.

 

Jungkook however.

 

There’s a moment Jungkook _thinks_ he regrets for what happens next, but suddenly he’s on his feet glowering at the man. Jin’s brother’s eyes widen in surprise and to Jungkook’s satisfaction, fear.

 

“Sorry? What was that you said about a guard dog?” Jungkook asks innocently.

 

The man stutters, “You were there the whole time?!”

 

Jungkook smiles, his eyes hooded and shoulders raised, “Yes, and I will be for a _long_ time.”  

 

He then proceeds to punch the man in the face reveling in the satisfaction of how his nose crunches. The man in thrown bag full force, and Jin yelps in surprise.

 

“Don’t come here again,” Jungkook hisses.

 

Later on Jin scolds the youngest for being reckless, and idiotic. During the whole rant Jin is bandaging his fingers, and running a hand up his back. Jungkook knows Jin isn’t really mad, but someone has to try and discipline the maknae.

 

Jungkook simply hugs Jin’s waist relaxing into the older boy, and Jin sighs running a hand through his hair.

 

“That was so very _stupid_ of you Kookie,” he whispers.

 

“But thank you so so much.”

 

Jin starts relying on the younger more, so Jungkook helps Jin become more confident. Helps him slowly become accustomed to standing up for himself, and letting comments roll right off his back. There are times Jin struggles, but Jungkook is always there.

 

He will cook with Jin, hug him closely, watch cheesy romance films, and listen to him cry for hours if it means seeing him smile. Jungkook cares a lot for the oldest, and sometimes it scares him how important he is to Jungkook. Because once again Jungkook is slowly giving more of his heart away.

 

There’s one day. One day Jungkook is drawing again, and these boys come and grab his sketchbook. Jungkook doesn’t want to cause a scene, but the things in that book are _private_.

 

The boys taunt him ruthlessly, seeming to have nothing better to do. Jungkook is about ready to start begging when a tall shadow looms over them.

 

Jin is there glowering at the boys just like Jungkook did for him.

 

“Excuse me, do we have a problem?” Jin asks his voice tight.

 

The boys shake their head, “No sir. N-Not at all.”

 

Jin glares grabbing the sketchbook and pointing to the door, “Then _leave_.”

 

Jungkook watches Jin, surprised by this display of confidence, when suddenly Jin is back to normal grabbing Jungkook’s face and making sure he isn’t hurt.

 

“Hyung I promise I’m okay,” he tells Jin again.

 

Jin looks more than unconvinced, “They could’ve hurt you Kookie..”

 

Jungkook smiles because of course that’s all Jin could think about, “And I could’ve hurt them a lot _worse_.”

 

Jin smacks him upside the head, “No you will not.”

 

Jungkook smiles and lets the elder take care of him. Jungkook thinks back to the day he punched Jin’s brother in the face. Realizes that Jungkook would punch a million versions of him it meant Jin could be a little less worried. He would always put himself before Jin, because the older boy is kind, gentle, and loving. Jin deserves to be happy, and Jungkook would got through everything if it meant seeing him smile.

 

~~_Because for some reason, seeing Jin happy makes Jungkook’s world._ ~~

~~~~

It takes a month for Jungkook to be introduced to the next boy. They’re a month in to Summer Break, but Jimin and Taehyung want to introduce him before university starts back up.

~~~~

Jimin and Taehyung tell him he should meet Yoongi next.

~~~~

Jungkook was only a little concerned because he knows from the boys Yoongi is actually really nice, but he’s not sure if he’ll be able to keep a conversation going. Jungkook hasn’t always been the best talker, it’s why with people like Taehyung and Jimin who do most of the talking help him the best.

~~~~

Ignoring his anxieties, Jungkook agree to meet him. Taehyung states to go to this book store at 3, and don’t be late. Jungkook gets there a bit early hoping to draw for a bit and calm down. The bookstore is really nice actually, and its aroma is very inspiring for Jungkook.

~~~~

Jungkook immediately starts sketching the world around him when something in his sketch catches his eye. Jungkook looks up to see a boy with giant headphones on. He has a laptop out and seems to be writing things down.

~~~~

Jungkook becomes intrigued by the mysterious figure, his blonde hair, and pale skin made him look like a ghost.

~~~~

He starts a new sketch of just the man. He traces along his jaw, and focuses on the eyes. When he looks up again, his breath catches. The man is now looking at _him_. Jungkook clams up and looks away, his hands clenching and unclenching under the table.

~~~~

There’s a movement before Jungkook feels a presence behind him. He looks and sees the man staring at him. It’s not angry like Jungkook expected it’s more, _curious_.

~~~~

“Ah, I, I’m sorry for not.. For not asking if I could draw you…” Jungkook mumbles.

~~~~

The man leans back, “Oh is that what you were doing?”

~~~~

Jungkook nods opening his sketchbook. He flips to his sketches of the library, and looks to the boy for a reaction. The boy places a hand on the sketchbook. He stares intently at the sketches, and then turns to Jungkook.

~~~~

“You’re pretty good kid,” he says grinning.

~~~~

Jungkook can’t help but feel the guy smiles a lot, but oh dear lord how cute that smile is.

~~~~

Jungkook laughs, “Thanks, I’m going to college for it so I hope I’m pretty good.”

~~~~

The boy surprisingly sits in front of Jungkook laptop and all, “No shit? Where are you going?”

~~~~

They both realize they will be going to the came college and Jungkook smiles, “Well I’ll at least know someone there.”

~~~~

“Kid, I’m not even sure I’ll see you again after this,” he replies.

~~~~

Jungkook smiles, “Do you write music?”

~~~~

The boy looks down, “Oh uh yeah, I wanna be a music producer.”

~~~~

Jungkook grins, “Let me know when you make it big then.”

~~~~

He grins in response. The two boys respectively go back to their own outlets. Jungkook starts drawing the boy again especially now with how close he is. The boy starts bobbing his head to something, and starts writing things down, crossing them out, or circling them.

~~~~

When three o'clock rolls around Jungkook isn’t even _surprised_ Taehyung is late. Tae’s late to everything. The other boy checks his watch and huffs getting his phone out and typing angrily.

~~~~

“Are you waiting for someone too?” Jungkook asks.

~~~~

He looks up, “Yeah just this stupid dongsaeng of mine, he tends to be late to any social event.”

~~~~

Jungkook laughs, “My friend is similar. He tends to get wrapped up talking to people along the way, and just forgets the time.”

~~~~

There isn’t a response so Jungkook looks up, and sees the boy staring at him curiously. Jungkook cocks his head confused on what he’s looking at.

~~~~

“What’s your name kid?” He asks.

~~~~

Jungkook’s mouth opens, “Oh right, I didn’t even introduce myself. I’m Jeon Jungkook.”

~~~~

Suddenly the man laughs and runs a hand down his face. He looks at Jungkook amusement clearly written on his face, “Jungkook? I’m Min Yoongi. I think we are supposed to meet today.”

~~~~

Jungkook’s eyes nearly pop out of his skull. He looks at Yoongi, and sees similar traits in him described by his friends. Jungkook feels his chest rumble with laughter and he leans back giving Yoongi is widest smile.

~~~~

Yoongi pauses and smiles softly, “It does look like a bunny.”

~~~~

Jungkook’s face heats up and he looks away. It’s just around then Tae burst through the door. The librarian immediately shushes him, which Taehyung does so sheepishly. That’s when he notices Jungkook and Yoongi already sitting together.

~~~~

The two boys explain what happened and Taehyung is overjoyed the two got along without his help. Yoongi swipes at Taehyung for being late, but there’s no malice to it. When their departure comes Yoongi pats Jungkook on the back.

~~~~

“Well looks like we _will_ be seeing each other more often Jungkook,” Yoongi states grinning.

~~~~

Jungkook nods, “I’m happy about that Yoongi-shi, you’re a very fun person to talk to.”

~~~~

“You can call me hyung if you’d like Jungkook, and if you ever want to I’m normally here writing music. Just don’t be annoying,” he replies.

~~~~

Jungkook nods, “I understand hyung, I think I’ll take you up on that offer.”

~~~~

The reason Yoongi is so interesting to Jungkook is the fact that they are very similar to one another. Both boys are quiet, reserved, and get lost in their work. The only difference is where Jungkook holds a constant bunny face, Yoongi has..

~~~~

Well he has a resting bitch face.

~~~~

Jungkook starts meeting Yoongi on Wednesdays, the two will sit at a table and work for hours. Sometimes they don’t even say a word to each other, but Jungkook will draw and bring snacks he shares with the elder.

~~~~

Jungkook loves these times with Yoongi. It gives him the time to relax, but also work on his art, Yoongi likes it because Jungkook doesn’t try and force a conversation. They speak in silences, and that’s definitely enough for him.

~~~~

Jungkook starts noticing things about Yoongi too though.

~~~~

Jungkook took notice of the bags under his eyes the first day they met. Then he notices the days he’s hunched over, his writing more frantic, and his face scrunched up in anger. He notices how Yoongi will dig his fingernails into his skin, and runs his hand back and forth creating angry red lines.

~~~~

Jungkook isn’t sure how to help Yoongi at first, he’s not like Tae, Jimin, or Jin. Yoongi isn’t big on touch, and Jungkook understands this. He’s just not sure how else to convey his feelings towards the boy.

~~~~

Jungkook starts by bringing Yoongi’s favorite snacks and drinks. Yoongi always looks so grateful for Jungkook afterwards, so he knows he’s doing something right. He starts asking Yoongi if he could listen to his music sometime. Yoongi seems nervous which isn’t an expression Jungkook likes on him. He agrees, handing Jungkook the bulky headphones. He slips them on, and looks to Yoongi excitedly.

~~~~

Yoongi huffs out a laugh before pressing play.

~~~~

The music flows into Jungkook’s ear slowly. He pays attention to each instrument, each bounce in beat, until finally there’s a voice. It’s rapping heatedly, going fast and hard, and somehow at the same time flowing so smoothly across his ears. Jungkook heard Yoongi was good, but damn he’s _good_.

~~~~

Jungkook takes them off, “Hyung! You didn’t tell me you were this good!”

~~~~

Yoongi takes the headphones, “You’re only just saying that to make me feel better.”

~~~~

Jungkook is surprised by his cold tone. He’s never seen Yoongi like this, the other boys have, and they’ve told him to leave him be.

~~~~

Jungkook does not.

~~~~

“I won’t ever lie to you hyung.”

~~~~

Yoongi looks up to Jungkook who stares at him with determination.

~~~~

“If you want I can give you my opinion, and it will only be the truth,” he tells him.

~~~~

Yoongi sucks in a breath nodding, but expecting a cruel answer.

~~~~

“It’s amazing, hyung. There’s something missing in the chorus, like there needs to be more vocals or more of the piano playing? The lyrics are incredible and your rapping flows amazingly, but I think it’s just missing that little bit of flare,” Jungkook tells him.

~~~~

Yoongi looks at Jungkook surprised. He opens his mouth to say something, and then closes it.

~~~~

“I, um. Thank you Jungkook, I wasn’t expecting that,” Yoongi mumbles.

~~~~

Jungkook smiles, “You need to treat yourself with respect hyung. I understand getting frustrated, but don’t beat yourself up about it. You have a lot of people here to help.”

~~~~

Yoongi stares at Jungkook for a long moment, and Jungkook isn’t sure on what he should do. The two stare at each other for a moment until Yoongi ruffles his hair, and goes back to writing his music. He seems to be in a better mood, and Jungkook pats himself on the back.

~~~~

He continues to bring extra snacks and drinks, making sure Yoongi is at least being fed. There are still days Yoongi gets frustrated, and Jungkook is always there to help the elder out. Yoongi grows to trust Jungkook, and Jungkook in return grows to care deeply for his hyung.

~~~~

“Yoongi-hyung?”

~~~~

Yoongi looks up at Jungkook who is twiddling with his hair. Yoongi cocks his head at the boy, and Jungkook feels like his chest might explode. Jungkook really wants to do a piece on Yoongi while he’s composing, but he’s scared to ask the boy to model for him.

~~~~

“Jungkook-ah, you don’t have to be afraid of me. What do you need kid?” Yoongi asks.

~~~~

Jungkook closes his eyes and sucks in a breath. Jungkook tries to organize his thoughts he truly does but all of a sudden he’s rambling and the words won’t stop.

~~~~

“Well there’s this competition going on, and if I do well I could get a scholarship for school, but I don't _really_ need it. It would be nice to have though, but I wanted you to be my model because your really inspiring and I love watching you work becauseyourjustareallycoolperson!”

~~~~

Yoongi has to take a moment to process the words that flew out of his mouth, and once Yoongi understands his eyes lock onto Jungkook’s in surprise.

~~~~

“Really? You want _me_ as your model?” He asks.

~~~~

Jungkook nods, “Yeah! The prompt is about dreams and… WellI just thought you would be perfect because your doing everything to achieve your dreams, and even if you get stressed you never stop trying hyung.”

~~~~

Yoongi looks away, “Well if you really want to…”

~~~~

Jungkook’s head snaps up, “Really?! You’ll do it?”

~~~~

The elder smirks, “Yeah, yeah, I’ll do it for you, brat. You owe me lamb skewers, though.”

~~~~

Jungkook laughs out loud quickly hugging the boy without thinking. Jungkook feels Yoongi tense, so he immediately lets go. He’s surprised when Yoongi pulls him back, giving Jungkook his wide, gummy smile.

~~~~

~~_Jungkook feels his heart burn._ ~~

 

Jungkook is at his house one day when the doorbell is rung multiple times. Jungkook opens the door to see a bouncing Jimin. Jungkook raises an eyebrow as Jimin rushes in and heads to Jungkook’s closet. Surprisingly enough Jimin gives him his work out clothes.

~~~~

“Jiminie, what are we doing?” Jungkook asks.

~~~~

Jimin grins, “I’m taking you to my dance club”

~~~~

Jungkook blinks at him, “Wait what? Jimin I don’t know these people! How do you know I’ll be welcomed?!”

~~~~

Jimin hums, “Which is why I asked if I could bring you to test it out!”

~~~~

Jungkook gives him a look before remembering something important, “Oh wait…”

~~~~

“Are we meeting Hoseok?” Jungkook asks.

~~~~

Jimin frantically nods, and drags Jungkook all the way to the dance studio. Jungkook is only slightly afraid about this. Well who is he kidding he’s one hundred percent terrified. Not only is he going to have to dance in front of strangers, but also in front of Jimin’s idol.

~~~~

Jungkook and Jimin arrive, and standing at the front is boy with the biggest smile he’s seen.

~~~~

He immediately knows it’s Hoseok.

~~~~

Jimin described his smile perfectly to Jungkook, and Jungkook finally understands what he means by sunshine. Hoseok is literally a ball of sunshine and energy. When Hoseok eyes latch onto Jimin, his eyes light up and somehow his smile gets _wider_.

~~~~

“Jiminie!!” Hoseok exclaims running forward and capturing him in a hug.

~~~~

Jungkook blinks at the very open form of affection in front of all these people surprised, but then Hoseok is looking at him curiously.

~~~~

“Jiminie, is this Jungkook?” he asks.

~~~~

Jimin nods pulling Jungkook forward, “This is him Hobi-hyung! Kookie is really good at dancing so I thought this was a good chance for him to meet you!”

~~~~

“Wait Jimin I thought you already asked if i could be here,” Jungkook states.

~~~~

Jimin hums, “Did I?”

~~~~

Hoseok laughs, “Well regardless your always welcome here Jungkook, were always in need of more dancers. Let’s get started shall we?”

~~~~

Once it starts Jungkook is very surprised to see what happens. It’s not like a class really, it’s more like a lot of people performing together and trying to make each of their performances better.

~~~~

When Jimin goes up he knows he’s in for a treat. Jimin has always been incredible at dancing, his body can be so angelic and graceful, but then it becomes hard and slams down with a powerful force. Once again Jungkook sees it once more, the way Jimin’s body moves across the studio, and how his body pops to each beat.

~~~~

When Jimin finishes everyone claps. None of them as loud as Jungkook. Hoseok grins and then goes to the center for his own performance. Jungkook doesn’t know what to expect. Jimin talks about how amazing Hoseok is all the time, but Jungkook only knows Jimin’s dancing so he’s not sure.

~~~~

God he was wrong.

~~~~

Hoseok is amazing. The moment the music starts Hoseok gets this serious look on his face, and suddenly he’s _moving_. Each movement is hard and fast. Somehow he remains light on his feet, and kicks his legs out gracefully. His expression shows one of determination, and Jungkook can’t help but feel in awe at the elder.

~~~~

When Hoseok stops the whole class erupts in applause. Jimin looks at Jungkook, and laughs when he sees his shocked expression. Jungkook looks to Jimin with wide eyes, and mouth parted.

~~~~

“What the hell?!” He whisper yells.

~~~~

“I know!!” Jimin squeals.

~~~~

“Jungkook? Do you wanna go next?”

~~~~

Said boy looks over to Hoseok who is panting with a large smile. Jungkook pales at this and starts to shake his head. Jimin grabs his hand, and offers him a smile.

~~~~

“Hey, how about we dance together hm? Just like old times?” Jimin asks.

~~~~

Jungkook feels a huge weight being lifted off of him as he and Jimin together go the dance floor. With Jimin Jungkook feels he can do anything. So Jungkook stands with Jimin and closes his eyes. He pretend that he’s alone with Jimin and Tae just dancing on the rooftop.

~~~~

The music starts and Jungkook springs into action. He and Jimin did this routine for years there’s no way in _hell_ he could forget it. Jungkook immediately pops to the beat, his elbow jutting out, in, and then he’s sliding. One, two, three.. Jungkook gets lost in the music and just the old memories of Jimin and dancing.

~~~~

The music ends as he and Jimin stand back to back panting. Jungkook comes back at the sound of applause. Everyone is looking at them in awe, and Jungkook looks away embarrassedly.

~~~~

“Jiminie, you didn’t tell me your friend was this good!” Hoseok exclaims surprised.

~~~~

Jungkook looks away blushing, “I’m really not that good hyung. Jimin-hyung and I just used to do that dance a lot.”

~~~~

Hoseok grabs Jungkook by the shoulders, “Jungkook you have a natural talent. You’re good. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.”

~~~~

Jungkook could feel a blush running up his neck, but Hoseok pats him on the back and they continue on. Jungkook thought Jimin was going to a class, but in actuality it’s more like a club. So Jungkook starts going with Jimin every week, and dances his heart out.

~~~~

Sometimes though , Hobi isn’t there.

~~~~

Other times when Jungkook asks, Jimin always changes the subject.

~~~~

So of course Jungkook realizes something is wrong.

~~~~

It starts when Hobi comes in one day, he holds a big smile, but there is no emotion to it. Jungkook doesn’t like it. Hobi’s smile is warmth and sunlight. This?

~~~~

It’s just a shadow.

~~~~

“Hyung? Would you like to get some food? My treat,” Jungkook asks one day.

~~~~

Hobi looks up he opens his mouth before he closes it and looks down. He contemplates something before smiling.

~~~~

“Sure Kookie, where do you wanna go?”

~~~~

Jungkook takes him to a diner not too far away. They eat in silence, and Hobi looks slightly uncomfortable. Jungkook watches him thoughtfully he doesn’t see him as much so it takes him longer to figure out what’s wrong, but finally he catches it.

~~~~

It’s when Hobi tries to make conversation that he spills his drink all over himself. Jungkook can’t help but laugh, and Hobi smacks him playfully. Hobi rolls up his sleeve and Jungkook sees them.

~~~~

He sees scars.

~~~~

Jungkook knows what those are. Knows why they happen, and he looks to Hoseok thoughtfully. How is it that the people with the prettiest smiles always suffer the most? Jungkook doesn’t say anything, he knows it would make Hobi uncomfortable. Jungkook does what he always does when faced with a difficult decision on how to help someone.

~~~~

He does it in the shadows.

~~~~

When Hobi lets Jimin and Jungkook come over one day, Jungkook memorizes the place and how to get there. On one of those days when Hobi doesn’t show up, Jungkook goes to his apartment. He leaves baskets by the door, full of notes telling him how much he’s loved. Jungkook puts snacks in there as well in case the boy forgets to eat. Jungkook invites Hobi to come sit with him every night after dance, and slowly Hoseok catches on too.

~~~~

“Jungkook-ah?”

~~~~

Jungkook looks up humming in response. Hobi looks at him thoughtfully, and then lays completely on the boy.

~~~~

“Hyung? What’s wrong?” Jungkook asks worried.

~~~~

Hobi smiles, “I’m okay Kookie, I wanted to say thank you.”

 ~~~~  
  


“For what hyung?” Jungkook replies as he situates himself to accommodate the person on top of him.

~~~~

Hobi rests his head on Jungkook’s, “You know what Kookie, for the notes, the baskets, the food, and the smiles you’ve given me.”

~~~~

Jungkook understands what he’s talking about now, “It’s no big deal Hoseok-hyung, everyone was trying to help.”

~~~~

“That’s true,” he replies, “but they were all a bit forceful...”

~~~~

“You never were Kookie. You let me come to you at my own pace, and for that I am so thankful,” Hoseok tells him.

~~~~

Jungkook feels his chest tingle at that, and he hugs Hoseok a little bit tighter in response. The two stay together like this for hours. Hoseok finally tells Jungkook to just come over, and Jungkook unable to deny his hyung’s need, of course comes over. The two stay up watching Friends and playing games.

~~~~

In the end Hobi falls asleep drooling all over Jungkook, but for some reason Jungkook couldn’t care less.

~~~~

~~_His heart is beating too fast for him to notice._ ~~

 

Not long after that Jungkook finds himself complaining to Taehyung about how he has to take certain classes, _even math._

~~~~

“Well, Kook-ah, Namjoon-hyung is really smart, and we were going to introduce you guys soon, you can always ask him for help,” Tae tells him.

~~~~

Jungkook looks at Taehyung thoughtfully. He’s been especially curious about Namjoon, Taehyung’s would be professor. It might be a good idea to invest in a tutor if he needs one. In highschool it was nightmare trying to become top of his class with math in the mix.

~~~~

Jungkook agrees, and Taehyung calls Namjoon up at once. Jungkook sits near Taehyung, trying to listen to the call. The phone clicks, and a deep voice comes out. To both Jungkook’s and Taehyung’s surprise, his voice is shakey, panicked even.

~~~~

_“Taehyung-ah?”_

~~~~

“Namjoon-hyung? What’s going on? Are you okay?” Taehyung asks in a panic.

~~~~

_“No- God, It’s.. my mom, she…”_

~~~~

“Hyung, you’ve gotta calm down,” Tae responds worriedly.

~~~~

Jungkook taps him on the shoulder, and mouths ‘lets go’. Taehyung nods grabbing his stuff and getting ready to go to Namjoon’s. Jungkook grabs a bag and stuffs snacks and a first aid kit. He’s not sure what he’s about to see, but he has a feeling it isn’t good.

~~~~

“No- Listen, hyung- Hey, No! Hyung, were coming stay there,” Taehyung says angrily.

~~~~

They run out the door, and Jungkook wants to know so badly about what is occurring. Jungkook knows this is neither the time nor place for him to do so. The two boys wind their way through alleys and streets until they stop at a small home. It’s not in the best neighborhood, but Taehyung throws the door open and rushes inside.

~~~~

Jungkook walks in next not expecting to hear the sobbing. He’s met with a gruesome sight. There’s debris everywhere, from what Jungkook doesn’t know. The sobbing comes from an elderly woman sitting across the room. She’s being cradled by another man he’s tall and his face is pinched in worry.

~~~~

“Namjoon-hyung, what happened?” Taehyung asks.

~~~~

Namjoon’s breath hitches, “I- They-”

~~~~

Jungkook clearly seeing the man struggle, intervenes, “Tae? We can talk about it later. Right now we need to help his mom okay?”

~~~~

Jungkook sits in front of the lady grabbing the first aid kit he’s kept with him since he first met Tae. Her face is horrible bruised, and there are glass shard stuck in her cheek. Jungkook winces.

~~~~

“Okay, I’m going to get the shards out first okay? It might hurt a little, but we’ve got to get them out,” he tells her hoping she can hear him.

~~~~

He grabs a pair of tweezers and gets to to work. As gently as he can Jungkook grabs each shard, and pulls it out setting it in a trashcan. Once that is finished he gets out an antiseptic. He applies it on the cuts. He places a bandage on her cheek and tells Taehyung to get some ice.

~~~~

“Okay, Namjoon-shi? Can you help move her up? I need to see where else she’s been hurt,” he tells the boy as gently as he can.

~~~~

Namjoon nods shifting her up against the wall a bit. Jungkook checks over her body. She has a few cuts but there aren’t as many bruises as he thought he’d see.

~~~~

“I know this might be really hard for you Namjoon-shi, but did they hit her anywhere else?” Jungkook asks.

~~~~

Namjoon pauses, his breath still shaky and uneven. He kneels down and rolls up his mothers pant leg. There is a nasty bruise forming, and it seems to be swelling too. Jungkook’s face scrunches up, but he grabs some gauze and starts wrapping it up.

~~~~

Taehyung shows back with ice packs, and Jungkook tells the boys to situate her on a bed. Namjoon places his mother on the bed slowly, and Jungkook asks for some pillows. With those he places them underneath her hurt leg and puts the ice pack on top. He of course then hands the other ice pack to Namjoon to place on his mother's face.

~~~~

Jungkook sighs when it’s all finished, and promptly falls flat on his butt. When he lands he feels something underneath him. He reaches around and picks up what seems to be a business card. There’s no name, no address, just a phone number. Jungkook gets a bad feeling from it, so he places it in his pocket.

~~~~

“Taehyung, thank you so much. You too of course, I’m sorry we had to meet like this Jungkook,’ Namjoon whispers.

~~~~

Jungkook feels his heart break, “Don’t apologize for this, you didn’t ask for this. You had no control over this situation.”

~~~~

Namjoon nods still trying to control his breathing.

~~~~

“Namjoon-hyung? W-What happened..?” Taehyung finally asks.

~~~~

Namjoon sucks in a breath, “I maybe didn’t ask for this, but this is still my fault.”

~~~~

Namjoon sighs running a hand down his face, “I- I never thought…”

~~~~

He still looks so torn over the situation so Jungkook scoots closer, “You don’t have to talk about it now, but I do think it might be a good idea. You have friends who can help you.”

~~~~

Namjoon looks up to Jungkook. His eyes are watering, and Jungkook can see his eyes contemplate something. Jungkook sighs before smiling warmly.

~~~~

“We can talk about it later,” he tells Namjoon.

~~~~

Taehyung is about to protest, when Jungkook shoots him a glare. Taehyung should know better than anyone not to corner someone about these kind of things.

~~~~

So the three boys stay the night at Namjoon’s house. Namjoon tells them to go home, but neither boy will listen. Jungkook forces Namjoon to rest, and during that he cleans up the mess left in their home. By the next morning the house is cleaned up, and Jungkook is making breakfast.

~~~~

“Ah, Jungkook you’re awake?”

~~~~

Jungkook turns to see Namjoon rubbing at his neck tiredly.

~~~~

“Oh, well I wanted to make breakfast for everyone, Namjoon-shi,” Jungkook replies.

~~~~

Namjoon’s face scrunches up, “You can call me hyung, I meant to tell you yesterday but I was well, busy.”

~~~~

Jungkook nods, “Trust me I understand, hyung.”

~~~~

“Yeah..” Namjoon trails off, “Jungkook?”

~~~~

Said boy hums in response.

~~~~

“How did you know to do all of those things?”

~~~~

Jungkook stops cutting the onions. He looks over to Namjoon who is watching him with careful, worried eyes.

~~~~

“If you think I’m being abused trust me I’m not,” he tells the taller boy,

~~~~

“Then how-”

~~~~

Jungkook sighs cutting him off, “Hyung that isn’t my thing to tell. It’s not my secret.”

~~~~

Namjoon looks like he wants to protest, but he nods leaning back. Jungkook goes back to making breakfast, and with Namjoon’s help finishes it all pretty quickly.

~~~~

“If were going to be asking questions, are you going to tell us what happened yesterday?” Jungkook asks.

~~~~

Namjoon stiffens, “I- I don’t want you getting involved Kook.”

~~~~

Jungkook’s eyes narrow, “Well too bad. Not to be disrespectful hyung, but I came here yesterday to a bloody mess. We need to know what’s going on so we can help.”

~~~~

Namjoon grabs at his hair, “No it’s just- God I was so _stupid_ Kook-ah.”

~~~~

“What do you mean hyung?” Jungkook responds.

~~~~

“Yoongi-hyung _told_ me not to go, but I did anyway…” he says.

~~~~

“Go where? And What does Yoongi-hyung have to do with this?” Jungkook asks confusedly.

~~~~

Namjoon whispers, “Yoongi-hyung and I have been underground rapping for months. Sometimes things can get bad if you piss someone off, but we’ve always had each others backs. Yoongi-hyung told me not to go last night. He was busy, but I thought it would be okay. I needed the cash so I went. I pissed someone off though, and they followed me home.”

~~~~

Jungkook realizes where the story is going.

~~~~

“They- They held me as they beat my mother into the floor. I was kicking and screaming, and they wouldn’t _stop_ ,” Namjoon finishes.

~~~~

Jungkook feels bile rise up his throat. He has so many other questions, but Namjoon is shaking. Jungkook gently wraps hands around his torso, and tries to get the boy to match his breathing. Namjoon’s breath hitches, and Jungkook rubs his back. The elder tries not to cry. He doesn’t want to in front of a person he just met. But Jungkook is holding him tightly, and he can’t stop himself.

~~~~

Namjoon breaks down in Jungkook’s arms. Jungkook holds tighter trying to cage himself around the boy like he’s done millions of times before. Taehyung ends up waking up to this, and shoots forward holding Namjoon as well.

~~~~

Seeing Namjoon sob like that breaks Jungkook’s heart.

~~~~

It’s also why he’s guarding Namjoon’s home like this.

~~~~

The next few weeks that follow are filled with the others coming by and helping out. Everyone is terrified for Namjoon, and Yoongi scolds him for being so reckless. They come over in shifts to help his mother, and guard the house just in case. Jungkook despite only being sent on Fridays drops by everyday to ease his nerves.

~~~~

It’s only a little later he receives a text from the group chat.

~~~~

_Seokjin-hyung (19:14)_

~~~~

Guys ther are the peone ther=

~~~~

_Yoongi-hyung (19:15)_

~~~~

Hyung? Is everything okay?

~~~~

_Seokjin-hyung (19:17)_

~~~~

Help

~~~~

Jungkook’s heart leaps into his throat. Seokjin is at Namjoon’s home right now. Jungkook ignores all of the buzzes in his phone, and sprints to Namjoon’s home. He calls the police before opening the door.

~~~~

_“LEAVE HIM ALONE!”_

~~~~

Jungkook recognizes Namjoon’s voice, and peaks around the corner. There are two men holding Namjoon while the other stands over Seokjin who has a gash on his head.

~~~~

“Well then he shouldn't have been texting,” the man taunts.

~~~~

Jungkook feels something pulse throughout his veins. He knows he should wait, wait for the sirens, wait for the others, just wait.

~~~~

But then that man slaps Namjoon across the face.

~~~~

And Jungkook snaps.

~~~~

_“Jungkook-ah?”_

~~~~

_Namjoon is sitting next to Jungkook one night. They’re watching the stars, and talking._

~~~~

_“What is it hyung?”_

~~~~

_Namjoon sighs, “I just wish I could repay you guys for all of this.”_

~~~~

_Jungkook smiles, “There’s no need hyung, we’ll always be here to help you.”_

~~~~

_Namjoon smiles back, “I know that, but still… I just wish I could do more.”_

~~~~

_“Well… I’ve been looking for a tutor.”_

~~~~

_Namjoon looks over to Jungkook surprised, and wondering if the boy is kidding._

~~~~

_He’s not._

~~~~

_“I may have graduated early hyung, but math is hardddd,” Jungkook whines._

~~~~

_There’s a burst of laughter, and Jungkook is looking over to Namjoon in surprise._

~~~~

_“What? What did I say?” Jungkook asks confusedly._

~~~~

_“No it’s just… Sometimes you don’t really act like a kid, Kook-ah. It’s kind of freaky,” he replies._

~~~~

_Jungkook shrugs, “Well when it comes to things like this, you kind of have to grow up. Don’t get me wrong though, I still love playing video games and teasing Jiminie.”_

~~~~

_Namjoon laughs, “I’m glad we could meet Kookie.”_

~~~~

_Jungkook’s smile widens, “As am I hyung. Come on lets get some rest.”_

~~~~

When Jungkook snaps out of it he’s hurting all over, but looks like so are the others. The three men are all bruised up too. Two of them are on the floor trying to regain their breath. The one standing is only being held up by Jungkook. There are sirens near, and Jungkook drops the man with a thud.

~~~~

Jungkook falls back, and tries to remember how exactly it happened. All he can really remember is jumping out and punching the man right in the face. After that it gets a little blurry.

~~~~

In the end the three men are taken away, and Jin is treated for his head wound. Jungkook is taken aside getting examined when the others arrive. Jimin and Taehyung are shocked to see him there, and even more so when they see the state he’s in.

~~~~

“Jungkook!”

~~~~

“Are you okay?”

~~~~

The boys badger him with questions, but thankfully a nurse stops them.

~~~~

“Calm down. He’s okay. Got a busted lip, and some nasty bruises but it’s nothing some ice will heal,” she tells them.

~~~~

The boys nod wrapping Jungkook in a tight hug. Jungkook feels his limbs unconsciously relax, and he sighs contentedly. That’s how he finds 6 boys all at his house later that night. They stay in his room making sure the boy gets plenty of rest, and stays in bed. The boys are figuring out sleeping arrangements when Jungkook requests that Namjoon stay with him.

~~~~

Namjoon is surprised by this, but agrees regardless. No one can ever say no to the maknae.

~~~~

“Namjoon-hyung?”

~~~~

Namjoon looks up from where he was reading on the floor, “What is it Kook-ah?”

~~~~

Jungkook pouts at him, “Can you just sleep up here?”

~~~~

Namjoon’s eyes widen, “Uh, are you sure Kookie?”

~~~~

When Namjoon receives a nod in response he sighs before getting underneath the blankets. Jungkook turns to look at the older boy. Namjoon stares down at him too, neither of them are sure on what to say.

~~~~

So instead Namjoon holds Jungkook closely and mutters all the thank you’s Jungkook can imagine.

~~~~

Jungkook responds by winding his arms around Namjoon, and letting his eyes close.

~~_  
_He still doesn’t understand why his insides are so warm._ _ ~~


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jungkook gets some time with each of his hyungs, 
> 
> Also there's a little OT7 centric at the end there

College is an interesting experience.

Don’t get him wrong, Jungkook loves the freedom. Loves the campus, the students, professors, and classes.

It’s just.

Well he doesn’t have any classes with the others.

Which yes in hindsight is a bit childish of him. However Jungkook is still quiet and timid, so he doesn’t really talk to anyone outside of his immediate friend group. Despite this Jungkook still goes to Jin’s cafe (he’s basically working there), still hangs out with Yoongi, still dances with Jimin and Hobi, still plays video games with Taehyung, and is now tutoring with Namjoon.

Namjoon is probably one of the best tutors Jungkook has ever had. That is if he could concentrate.

Jungkook doesn’t know why, but whenever he’s with Namjoon he can’t keep his eyes off of him. He gets that warm feeling again, and can’t ever seem to focus. His eyes always drift to Namjoon’s hands, his eyes, his lips…

“Jungkook-ah?”

Jungkook’s head snaps up, “Ah, sorry hyung I got distracted.”

Namjoon quirks an eyebrow up, “This is the third time Jungkook, if your not serious-”

“No! Please I’m sorry it’s just weird adjusting to… everything,” he replies.

It’s not a complete lie. He is having a hard time adjusting, there’s just something else going on too. Something Jungkook has yet to figure out. Namjoon shakes his head before going back to the lesson at hand. Namjoon is good at explaining things in a way Jungkook can understand. He honestly helps with a lot of Jungkook's classes, and Jungkook sees first hand how smart the boy is.

Namjoon, amazes Jungkook. He’s passionate, strives for his goals, and is very poetic. He inspires Jungkook, and inspires the boy to be just like him. It’s why Jungkook pesters Namjoon about his underground rap battles.

“No, Jungkook-ah you are _not_ going,” Namjoon tells him once more.

Jungkook whines, “But hyung! It’ll be okay, I’m really strong! You saw me take down those guys.”

Namjoon runs a hand through his hair, “It’s exactly why I want you away from all of this.”

“Hyung, I know you’re scared, but I can take care of myself. I’ve done it for _years_ ,” Jungkook tells him.

His sentence has a double meaning that only Jungkook, Tae and Jimin could understand, but it’s the truth. Jungkook can take care of himself. He works out, takes taekwondo, and has the stamina to run 4 miles while barely breaking a sweat.

Okay, maybe that last one is an exaggeration.

“Hyung please, I don't want you and Yoongi-hyung going there by yourselves,” Jungkook finally pulls out the puppy dog eyes.

Namjoon knows he’s going to give in, no one, absolutely no one, can say no to Jungkook when he’s like this.

“Alright Kook, but first sight of trouble you leave, got it?” Namjoon looks him in the eyes.

Jungkook stares back his heart skipping, “Yes hyung.”

“You _seriously_ said yes to the kid?”

Jungkook is standing beside Namjoon, rocking back on his heels. Namjoon gives Yoongi his best smile, and Yoongi rolls his eyes.

“He pulled the puppy dog eyes didn't he?” Yoongi asks.  
  
“Oh absolutely,” Jungkook answered.

Yoongi smacks him lightly, “This isn't a joke Jungkook-ah, you could get seriously hurt.”

“I know hyung, but it's better me than you.”

Namjoon and Yoongi look to their youngest surprised. Jungkook seems to not understand what is wrong with his statement. He stares up at the stars, not even paying attention to his now very worried hyungs.

“Kookie?”

Jungkook looks to Yoongi, the boy never uses nicknames with Jungkook.

“What's wrong hyung?” Jungkook asks.

Yoongi stares at him for a moment. He opens his mouth to say something, closes it, and then shakes his head.

“It's nothing Kook, just come on,” Yoongi says.

Namjoon pays close attention to the maknae after that. However Jungkook acts completely normal. He laughs and teases Yoongi ruthlessly. He seems normal, but what he said…

It really worries him.

Once they get close Yoongi stops and turns to Jungkook.

“Okay so here's the plan, when we're down there we go by Suga and Rap Monster,” Yoongi tells the boy.

Jungkook quirks a brow, “Rap Monster?”

Namjoon lightly hits him on the chest, and Jungkook stifles a laugh. Honestly it's not a bad name, Jungkook just wonders how Namjoon will prove it. He has no doubt in his hyungs talent, and Jungkook expects something incredible from both of them.

Jungkook looks down the alley, and slowly changes his presence. He stands up tall, moves his hair out of his face, and makes his face devoid of emotion. He knows this is dangerous. Knows that people could get hurt.

But if Jungkook can stop that pain, even if just a little bit, he'll be overjoyed.

When he walks in there are people everywhere. It's crowded, and Jungkook can smell the traces of alcohol everywhere. He walks near the front, but sticks to the side.

During this he slips on a face mask, and waits for the show to start. People hold money up, and Jungkook realizes they bid on who will win. It's almost reminds him of a fight club.

One by one contestants come up. Some are new, others have been doing this for a long time, and…

Some of them are really fucking good.

When Suga steps up there's a roar from the crowd. Everyone chants Suga’s name over and over. Jungkook grins before joining in. Suga makes eye contact with him for a second, and then he’s glowering at his challenger.

The other guy starts off, and he’s actually really good. He disses Yoongi’s blonde hair, his clothes, and pale skin. Yoongi remains calm during the man’s string of insults. Jungkook wonders if this is why Yoongi doesn’t care what people say, because he hears insults like this all the time.

When the guy finishes there are ‘oohs’ going around. Yoongi smirks to himself. His eyes go to the crowd, to the man, and then to Jungkook.

And suddenly he’s off.

Yoongi snaps into a complete freestyle verse that sets Jungkook’s limbs on fire. Yoongi raps hard and fast just like the track Jungkook was shown in the library. Yoongi points out the man’s balding hair, the man's loneliness, and lack of style compared to his own. Yoongi is brutal, and Jungkook expects nothing less from his cold hearted hyung.

Jungkook finds himself grinning like an idiot, and the people start screaming. Jungkook by far the loudest. Yoongi steps back before dropping the mic, and Jungkook can’t believe it really.

“SUGA! SUGA! SUGA!”

Yoongi looks to crowd with a grin, he then turns to Jungkook almost expectantly. Jungkook is still grinning stupidly, and he gives his hyung a thumbs up. Yoongi smiles wide, and once more Jungkook feels his insides liquidate. He really needs to figure out why that is.

The MC comes back out slapping Yoongi on the back, and handing him a wad of cash. Yoongi takes the money and hops down, going off somewhere near the back. Jungkook turns his attention back to the stage. There are a few more battles, but Jungkook doesn’t really care about them.

He’s just excited to see Namjoon.

Finally the MC comes out with a grin wide on his face, “Now, ladies and gentlemen, it’s time for our reining champion to defend his title of the King of Rap Battles.”

Jungkook feels his nerves tingle with excitement.

“RAP MONSTER!”

Jungkook watches in pure amazement as Namjoon steps forward, he had no idea his hyung was so popular in a place like this. Another man comes out, he’s built larger than Namjoon, but Jungkook wonders what this man will do. Namjoon is incredibly smart and talented. Jungkook has his absolute faith in his hyung.

And he has good reason to be.

This time Namjoon starts off. Jungkook knew he raps, but dear god he raps. Jungkook finally understands why Namjoon is called Rap Monster. His verses are strong and his words spoken as if he had planned every single second of it out. He’s just as brutal as Yoongi, and everyone can see how the man’s face grows red when Namjoon states he’s, “Sorry his wife left him”.

Everyone in the crowd screams, and Jungkook covers his mouth in surprise. The man balls his fist up, and everyone waits for him to start. Jungkook can see he’s choking though unable to get over that last comment. Namjoon crosses his arms over his chest before looking to the crowd.

“Sorry boys, look likes our challenger is choking,” he shouts.

The crowd loves the taunting, and eggs on the challenger even more. The burly man yells something Jungkook can’t hear, and Namjoon rolls his eyes. The man then storms off, and the crowd boos. Jungkook joins in because honestly that was pathetic.

“Well sorry folks looks like that was too hard for the guy,” Namjoon laughs.

The crowd starts chanting though, “ENCORE! ENCORE!”

Namjoon raises an eyebrow, “Oh, would you like a performance?”

The crowd yells “YES” and Jungkook can’t help but nod with them. He wonders what Namjoon’s lyrics are like. When Namjoon starts his verse Jungkook feels the world stop. Namjoon’s rap is deep, Jungkook can feel how much Namjoon put into it. It shows his feelings of the world, and how he thinks. Jungkook can’t help but listen to the last lines on repeat.

_I wish I could love myself._

Jungkook feels every emotion Namjoon poured out into those lyrics. His heart stops for a moment, and suddenly Jungkook feels more than respect for his hyung. He wants to go and hug Namjoon, wants to tell him how amazing, how much he is loved, and how much Jungkook is in lo-

_Oh._

Jungkook sucks in a breath. He looks up and makes eye contact with Namjoon, and gives him the biggest smile he can muster. Namjoon smiles back, and bows to the crowd. His persona drops for a moment there, and Jungkook can see the Namjoon he’s gotten to know over the months. Namjoon looks at Jungkook one last time, and gives him one of the most beautiful smiles Jungkook has ever seen from him.

Jungkook looks down feeling his face heat up.

_God he is so screwed._

It’s a normal Tuesday when Jungkook receives a phone call. Jungkook doesn’t have any classes today so he answers right away.

_“Jungkook-ah?”_

It’s Jin whose on the other line, and Jungkook wonders what’s going on.

“Is everything okay hyung?” Jungkook asks.

 _“Jungkook, I’ve never been better!”_ Jin responds.

Jungkook laughs, “Woah there Jin-hyung. What’s got you so happy?”

 _“So, I was at the cafe, and this customer walked in. They ordered a very simple order, but at the end I gave them my charming kiss. He must have loved it because he laughed and gave me a HUGE tip!!”_ Jin practically screams.

Jungkook smiles, “That’s great hyung! What are you going to do with it?”

_“Actually that’s why I called… I want to treat you Kook-ah. You’ve been such a great help lately.”_

Jungkook pauses surprised and very flattered, “Ah, Jin-hyung you don’t have to do that.”

_“Aish you always pester me for food, and when I offer, you decline? What’s with you Jeon Jungkook!”_

Jungkook smiles to himself, “Okay, okay, but only because you insisted.”

Jungkook can practically see Jin’s smile, _“That’s more like it! I’ll be there in a few minutes okay?”_

“Okay, hyung,” Jungkook replies.

He can’t help but feel very happy that Jin is willing to do this for him. He’s been so confused lately with his feelings about three certain people, and could use a break to just relax. When Jin arrives Jungkook hops in his car, and the two are off. Jin plays music and sings along to it screaming at some parts. Jungkook laughs and can’t help but join in. It’s time like these Jungkook forgets Jin is the oldest.

The elder would instead act like the maknaes than a hyung sometimes. However Jin does a great job as the oldest. He listens to the others, constantly checks up on them, and gives the best hugs. The others started joking calling him “eomma” but honestly? It kinda fits.

Jin takes him to a restaurant not too far, and tells Jungkook to order whatever he’d like. Jungkook smiles at Jin’s kind gesture, and orders some food. As they wait Jin looks to Jungkook thoughtfully.

“What is it hyung?” Jungkook asks.

“Nothing, well I mean it’s something but… I was just wondering…” Jin mutters.

Jungkook nods for the elder to continue.

Jin smiles, “Okay, so you know how you’re always helping me at the cafe right?”

He nods again, “Of course hyung, I basically work there.”

Jin grabs his hands, “That’s what I wanted to talk about. Why don’t you just work for me? Like officially.”

Jungkook stares at Jin surprised. This was something he didn’t expect, I mean Jungkook does in a way work there, and it wouldn’t be an issue. Jungkook thinks for a moment, he would like to become independent one day, so maybe this is a good opportunity. Jungkook looks Jin in the eyes and grins.

“I don’t know hyung, you might have to pay a lot for these guns,” Jungkook says cheekily.

Jin smacks him, “Aish, here I am pouring my heart out to you, and you don’t even care.”

Jungkook smiles, “In all seriousness hyung, I wouldn’t mind.”

“Really?!” Jin exclaims.

Jungkook nods, “Of course hyung, I like coming in and helping I might as well earn some money while I’m at it too.”

Jin hugs Jungkook tightly after that, sending tingles up his spine. He hugs Jin back and takes a deep breath, the elder seems to be wearing a type of cologne. Jungkook breathes it in again, and tries to commit it to memory.

Once their food arrives Jungkook devours it. The food is delicious, and the young boy is starving. He ends up getting sauce all over his face, and Jin bursts out laughing at the youngest. Jungkook looks at him confusedly before realizing his face is very sticky.

Jin then surprised Jungkook by reaching over and wiping the sauce off his face. Jin’s face gets very close to his, and Jungkook stares at Jin again. The man has always been beautiful, Jungkook knew this since the day they met, but in that moment Jin looks stunning. Jungkook feels his chest tighten, and his face starts to heat up.

Thankfully Jin pulls away before he can notice, and stares at the maknae lovingly. Jin always has this effect on Jungkook, he makes him feel small. Not like a bad small, not at all, but in a way Jungkook feels completely taken care of.

Jungkook would rather die than admit that though.

After that Jin takes Jungkook on a stroll through the park. Jungkook doesn’t know where they’re going, but in the end they end up at a river. The moon is out, and it’s light reflects in the water. It’s very tranquil, and Jungkook lets the breeze flow over him. It’s a nice night, and it only gets better.

“Jungkook?”

He glances over to Jin, who is giving him that look again.

“Yes hyung?” he replies.

Jin throws his hands behind his back, “Thank you for coming with me today.”

Jungkook laughs, “Well of course hyung, you did invite me, plus you paid.”

“No I mean just… Thank you for keeping me company. I always appreciate it,” the elder responds.

Jungkook stares at him for a bit. Traces each part of Jin, and looks at how the moonlight reflects off his skin.

_He truly is beautiful_

Jungkook snaps himself out of his thoughts, “It’s no problem hyung. I like spending time with you. You always make me feel happy and just secure I guess.”

Jin gives Jungkook a thousand watt smile, and Jungkook does his best to return it. Jin then reaches over and tugs the boy into a hug. Jungkook finds himself involuntarily relaxing, and slowly becoming tired.

Jin notices because well, it’s Jin. He’s always paying close attention to the group. Especially the maknaes.

Jin drops off Jungkook at his house, and Jungkook realizes that this was kind of like a date. Jungkook’s not sure why that makes him so happy, but he smiles brightly. Jin then gets out of the car and hugs Jungkook one last time.

“Again, thank you Kookie,” he tells the maknae.

Jungkook shakes his head, “I’m not sure what’s gotten into you tonight, but I will always be here hyung. Even when your old and sick, poor or rich, or simply sad. I will always be here.”

Jin smiles warmly at the boy.

“I know.”

Jin then proceeds to kiss him on the forehead, “Goodnight baby.”

Jungkook feels his face burn, and suddenly he's running inside. He clutches at his heart, trying to stop it from bursting out of his chest.

_Oh dear God he is so fucked._

A couple weeks after his ‘not date’ with Jin, Jungkook is in the library frantically drawing. He’s not sure why, but his chest feels so incredible tight. His head is pounding, and Jungkook can’t stop sweating. He’s worried he’s getting sick.

Suddenly a hand is on his shoulder, and Jungkook jumps from the touch. Yoongi holds his hands up in surrender, before looking at the maknae closely. The elder rests his hand on his forehead.

“Yah, Jungkook-ah, you definitely have a fever,” Yoongi scolds him, “What on earth are you doing here?”

Jungkook hums in response too tired to form words. Was he really feeling this bad earlier? Jungkook leans into Yoongi’s touch because his hands are cold, and Jungkook feels as if he’s on fire. Yoongi curses before helping the boy to his feet, and then making their way to Jungkook’s home.

“Jungkook-ah, I need you to open the door okay?” Yoongi tell him.

Jungkook nods tiredly gripping his house key. Somehow he manages to unlock the door, and the two walk inside. Yoongi places Jungkook on the couch before grabbing some blankets. He tucks the sick maknae into the couch, and Jungkook is out like a light.

The next time he wakes up, Yoongi is sitting beside him Jungkook’s head in his lap. Yoongi’s hand cards through his hair, and Jungkook sighs contently. Yoongi peers over the boy.

“Oh, you’re awake,” Yoongi says.

Jungkook nods still very sleepy, “Yeah, sorry about this hyung.”

Yoongi pats his back, “Shush, it’s a hyungs job to take care of sick maknaes.”

“Which is another thing,” he continues, “why were you at the library when you were so sick?”

Jungkook sighs, “I've got a project to do.”

Yoongi growls, “Your health is way more important than some project Kook-ah, you need to be careful.”

Jungkook nods, “Sorry hyung.”

Yoongi sighs before continuing on carding his hand through Jungkook’s hair. Jungkook still feels warm, but there’s another warmth he feels too. It radiates in his heart, and spreads everywhere else. Jungkook feels his eyes grow more and more tired until Jungkook is out again.

The next morning Jungkook wakes up with his head still in Yoongi’s lap. The older of the two is fast asleep, but still has his hand resting on Jungkook’s head. He smiles at the elder, and shifts to get more comfy. Jungkook doesn’t ever want to move again if he can stay like this.

Soon enough however Yoongi wakes up, and Jungkook turns to look at him.

“Morning hyung,” Jungkook says with a smile.

Yoongi rubs his eyes tiredly, “Morning Kookie, you feeling any better today?”

Jungkook nods smiling, “Yup, it’s all because hyung nursed me back to health.”

Yoongi snorts, and then gets up. He rests his hand on Jungkook’s forehead once more. He’s a little warm, but it’s definitely not as bad as yesterday.

“Alright good,” he mutters.

Jungkook smiles, “Thank you hyung. If you want you can head on home, I think I'm all good now.”

Yoongi gives him a look. Jungkook knows that look pretty well by now. He gives it the most towards Tae, but sometimes Jungkook receives it too.

It's the look of Yoongi calling him an idiot.

“Absolutely not,” Yoongi says, “your fever could come back, and someone should be here with you. In fact where are your parents?”

Jungkook stops there for a moment, and takes another moment to breath. His parents left on a trip not too long ago. They left their credit card in case Jungkook needed anything, but Jungkook has yet to use it,

“Jungkook-ah?”

The boy looks to his hyung with an expression Yoongi hasn't seen before. It's completely devoid of emotion, and he sees some emotions swirl throughout his eyes.

“Sorry hyung, my parents won't be back until next week,” he tells him.

Yoongi feels like he's been slapped in the face, “What?? Jungkook you can't be serious, they just left you here?”

Jungkook gives him a look, “Hyung I'm basically an adult already, I know how to look after myself-”

“Which is why I had to carry you home? Because you did such a good job taking care of yourself yesterday?” Yoongi asks harshly.

Jungkook flinches from the cold words, and can't help but glare, “Hyung, you don't know what youre talking about. Leave it alone.”

Yoongi glares back, “Jungkook I think I deserve to know. I helped you out yesterday, but if your gonna act like a brat I might as well leave.”

_“Then Leave!!”_

Yoongi recoils from Jungkook’s yell. The boy is breathing harshly, his hands are shaking, and he won't look Yoongi in the eye.

“Leave like they did…”

“I don't need you, I don't need them, I'm _fine_.”

Yoongi feels his heart break, he had no idea the boy was dealing with this. He highly doubted anyone knew. Of course they all noticed Jungkook's parents were never present, but they didn't want to ask either.

Jungkook curls in on himself, turning away from Yoongi.

“Jungkook-ah, I- I'm sorry. That was out of line it's just… it's just that I hate the fact you’re not being taken care of like you should be,” he tells the boy.

“I know you can take care of yourself,” Yoongi continues, “but you shouldn't have to.”

Jungkook flinches at this, he knows Yoongi is right. He knows that his home life isn't normal, he knows his parents should take care of him, love him even, but Jungkook can't do anything about it.

Yoongi sits on the couch before awkwardly wrapping his arms around the boy. Yoongi wishes he would just cry, let out all the emotions he has to be feeling. Jungkook however just hugs Yoongi back resting his head on his chest.

“I'm sorry for yelling at you hyung,” he whispers softly.

Yoongi chuckles, “It’s okay Kook, I said some pretty rude things too.”

Jungkook leans back looking away from the elder, “I know that what my parents are doing is bad, but they made me who I am today. Which is the only thing I'm thankful for.”

Yoongi gives him a sad smile, “I couldn't agree more with that, bunny.”

Jungkook feels his face heat up at the nickname, and presses his face into Yoongi’s neck. Yoongi holds him close, and kisses the top of his head. Jungkook is surprised by the soft actions of his hyung, and feels his body light up once more.

_Oh dear god this isn't happening._

When Tae and Jimin come over a few days later, they both have the biggest smiles he's ever seen. Jungkook lets them in before raising an eyebrow.

“Did something good happen?”

Taehyung grabs Jungkook suddenly, and spins him around, “ ** _SHE'S OUT!!_** _She's out, she's out, she's out!!”_

Jungkook shrieks in surprise, “Oh my god Tae!! Who are you talking about?!”

Jimin comes up from behind, “Tae’s sister. She’s out Kookie. She's safe.”

Jungkook's eyes wides, and he turns to Tae, “How is that possible? She's not out of high school yet right?”

Tae shakes his head, “Nope! But a family friend saw what was happening and took her in. My dad didn't care because he's never cared about our well being, so she's staying there now.”

Jungkook beams, “Tae that's great!”

Jungkook squeezes his best friend extra tight, “I'm so happy for you.”

Jimin joins in on the hug, “We both are. I'm so glad you both got away from that bastard.”

Taehyung nods, “Me too ChimChim.”

Jungkook knows that this calls for one of their special sleepovers. Jungkook grabs the blankets and movie rack, and then sets up the living room.

Nights like these are common for the three boys, and Jungkook feels his fingers tingle. Ever since Jungkook realized his feelings for the two it's been a roller coaster from there. He hides it well, but on the inside he feels his body flipping upside down.

“Jungkook?”

Said boy looks to see Jimin looking at him softly, “What are you thinking about?”

Jungkook smiles, “Nothing much hyung, I just… I'm so thankful they got out. It was hard seeing him suffer throughout the whole thing, and now that he's out… God I'm just so happy.”

Jimin's eyes soften and he hugs the boy tightly, “Me too Kookie, there won't be anymore bruises, and if there are I know you'll take care of it.”

Jungkook laughs and rests his head against Jimin’s. He lets his body just soak up Jimin’s aura, and feels his body react like so. His heart starts beating faster, and his face turns a light pink.

“Awww no fair! Your cuddling without me!!”

Tae jumps on the two and they all go crashing into the couch. Jungkook and Jimin laugh loudly, and Tae grins at the two. Once the three are comfortable Jungkook puts in Iron Man, and joins the other two in the floor.

“Thanks Kookie,” Taehyung whispers.

Jungkook looks at him confusedly, “For what Tae?”

Taehyung gives him his boxy smile, and Jungkook feels his heart soar.

“I know high school was hard for you, and dealing with all of my shit didn't help,” Taehyung says.

Jungkook stares at him surprised, “Taehyung don't you ever apologize for that, you too Jimin. I would do it all over again if it meant seeing you happy.”

Jimin smiles so sweetly towards the two and he hugs them as best he can. Jungkook looks at Jimin and then to Tae. He realizes he's so very screwed, there's no way either of them could love him. Jungkook wishes he could understand why he feels this way, and why his heart holds so much love.

It's definitely not normal, but with Tae and Jimin on either side he decides to not care. So maybe it's not normal to be in love with multiple people, but Jungkook doesn't know how to stop.

A few days later Jungkook finds himself walking in the street. He walks with a purpose and people start to get out of his way. He puts his face mask on, and continues walking throughout the town.

Finally Jungkook stops in front of an apartment, it's shabby, withered down, and looks abandoned. Jungkook takes a deep breath before walking up the stairs, and stops in front of a door.

Jungkook rings the doorbell multiple times, and he hears a man yelling.

The door is flung open and a man with balding hair, a disgusting odor, and grease stained clothes. Jungkook growls at the man.

“This is for Tae you son of a bitch!”

Jungkook slams his fist in in his face, and the man goes flying back. He falls to the floor completely knocked out, and Jungkook shuts the door walking away.

_No one hurts his friends and gets away with it, even if it takes years for karma to bite him in the ass._

A month passes by and Jungkook is trying to find inspiration for one of his projects. He’s taking a video editing class, along with some other fine arts, but his editing project is kicking him in the butt. He crumples up the 6th piece of paper, and tosses it away angrily. He can’t find inspiration at all. The project is about him, but once again Jungkook doesn’t know what to say.

_Ding Dong_

Jungkook looks towards his door, and hops over. He opens up the front door, and sees Hoseok grinning widely. Jungkook blinks for a moment before realizing he promised to hang out with the boy. Jungkook immediately feels guilty for forgetting, and lets him into his home. Hobi comes in and sees the state of Jungkook’s living room which is normally tidy and spotless.

Jungkook scratches the back of his head before grabbing his garbage very embarrassed. Hoseok looks to Jungkook with a curious expression.

“Kook-ah, normally your home isn’t so dirty, I mean it’s fine my apartment is so much worse, but… Are you doing okay?” Hoseok asks.

Jungkook smiles tiredly, “Yeah hyung I’m okay, sorry I forgot we were hanging out today. I’m trying to do this project and it’s kicking me in the butt.”

“Well what’s the prompt?” Hobi asks resting his face in his hand.

Jungkook sighs, “It’s about me, it’s supposed to be about my life, and how it’s made me the person I am today.”

Hoseok cocks his head to the side, “That doesn’t sound so bad Jungkook. I bet there are tons of things in your life that made you who you are. “

Jungkook sighs, “Hyung I’m just not an interesting person”

Hoseok’s face scrunches together for a moment. He then proceeds to pick up his phone, texting somebody. Jungkook hears his own phone buzz, and grabs it. There's a message in the group chat.

_Sunshine-hyung (13:16)_

_Jungkook needs help on a project that’s about him, but he claims he’s not interesting. I think we need to remind our maknae of how incredible he is._

_Jin-hyung (13:18)_

_I’ll bring the food._

_Tae Tae (13:18)_

_I’ll grab some movies._

_Suga-hyung (13:19)_

_Namjoon and I are on our way._

_Jiminnie (13:20)_

_Jungkook-ah you know that’s absolute lie, me and Tae will be there soon. Until then Hobi keep him company~ <3_

_Sunshine-hyung (13:21)_

_Wouldn’t dream of anything else ChimChim~ <3_

_Me (13:22)_

_Guys that’s really not necessary._

“Hyuuuuung,” Jungkook whines looking to Hobi.

Hoseok shushes the maknae, and wraps him in a hug. They move to the couch, and despite Jungkook being extremely embarrassed and slightly angry he feels warm all over. It’s nice knowing his friends care that much about him to come so quickly.

There’s a knock on his door, and Jungkook finds Yoongi and Namjoon waiting outside. Yoongi flicks him on the forehead, and Namjoon ruffles his hair.

“You guys really didn’t have to come all this way,” Jungkook tells them.

“Dongsaengs need to listen to their hyungs, so your going to listen,” Yoongi tells him.

Namjoon nods, “It still surprises me you don’t think your interesting Jungkook-ah.”

Jungkook looks away, and suddenly Hobi is back wrapping his arms around Jungkook’s torso, and pulling him back to the elder. Jungkook is forced to sit on Hoseok’s lap, and finally after struggling for a bit relaxes. Hoseok hums a soft tune, and Jungkook feels something in the pit of his stomach.

_Ding Dong!_

_Ding Dong!_

_Ding Dong!_

The doorbell is frantically rung over and over, and everyone knows who’s on the other side. Taehyung bursts inside once Namjoon opens the door. He tackles both Jungkook and Hobi into the couch. The pair groan in unison, and Jungkook peels Tae off of him. Jimin comes in next giving Jungkook the most pitiful pout he’s seen from the elder.

“Guys-”

“Don’t even try it Kookie,” Jimin tell him.

“Yeah, you dork. We’re going to have a talk about your trend of not realizing how good of a person you are,” Tae joins in.

Jungkook feels his face heat up as his fellow maknaes praise him, it doesn’t help that he’s already having so many confusing emotions going on right now. When finally Jin arrives chicken in tow, they all sit down in the living room. Hoseok still has an arm on Jungkook, and Jungkook still doesn’t understand why it makes him feel so light.

“Okay, Kook-ah. It’s time for an intervention,” Jin tells him with a smile.

Jungkook looks sheepish, “Guys this really is-”

“Shush, your hyungs are talking,” Jimin interrupts.

Jungkook promptly shuts his mouth. Jimin gives him a sad sort of smile, and then Taehyung clears his throat. Everyone turns to the second youngest. Taehyung looks scared, and Jimin rubs his back comfortingly. He clenches and unclenches his hands a few times before turning to the others.

“I’m going to tell you all something really important. It has to do when Kook and I were still in highschool…” Taehyung trails off.

Jungkook sucks in a breath. He knows what Taehyung is going to talk about, and he scoots closer to the boy. Taehyung gives Jungkook a smile, before turning to the others.

“When I was in highschool I ran straight into Jungkook. He was tiny then, and looked so startled I couldn’t help but feel bad. I started walking him to school, eating with him, talking to him more and more. During those times however… things at home weren’t great. My dad, he, he uh.”

“He beat me.”

Everyone snaps their gaze to Taehyung in horror, Yoongi looks at him as if he already knew and Jungkook isn’t surprised. Jimin wraps an arm around Taehyung’s torso, and Tae takes in a shuddering breath.

“It was bad, and I knew Jungkook saw the bruises. It was impossible to hide them all, but to my surprise Jungkook never asked. He just started bandaging my arms, holding me close, and always telling me he cared about me. I realized I had someone to rely on, and I started to accept the love I was receiving.”

The others turn to Jungkook who is looking towards the ground. He remembers those days he won’t ever be able to forget them. He looks up to Tae who is giving him a warm smile.

“Jungkook was always there for me, and I couldn’t be more appreciative,” he tells them.

Jin gets up and hugs Taehyung tightly, “I know you’re better now, but I also know you still live with that bastard some nights. If it ever gets too bad you call me first thing okay?”

Taehyung smiles, “Not anymore my sister got out so I’m staying with Jiminnie now.”

Taehyung wraps slender hands around Jin’s waist. Jungkook can see Tae tremble and Jin runs a hand through his hair. In the end Jin ends up with his lap full of Taehyung, and Jimin coughs.

“I guess it’s my turn huh?” he asks nervously.

“Hyung you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to,” Jungkook tells him.

Jimin shakes his head, “No, you need to hear this Kookie.”

“I transferred in the middle of the year. I was terrified because I knew no one, and had zero friends. Taehyung then came out of nowhere talking rapidly about his friend, and how I should meet him. He told me his friend was like a bunny, and naturally I was curious. That was when I met Jungkook-ah. He was small and had the cutest smile I ever saw.”

“I found out about Tae’s secret and joined Jungkook is helping him, but during those times I was struggling too. I dealt with a lot of bullies in high school, Tae tried to help stop it, but they were ruthless. Always commenting on my weight, and how ugly I was. I started to believe it, and stopped eating. I remember days when my parents would make me eat, and an hour later fingers would be down my throat to throw it all back up.”

Everyone is so quiet during this, and Jungkook can feel his eyes water. He had no idea about the bullies, no one ever told him that was occuring.

Jimin sighs water leaking out of his eyes, “Kookie noticed though, he started telling me I was beautiful, that he liked me the way I was, and that he loved me very much. It took such a long time to accept his praise, but soon enough I started eating again. I’m not sure where I would be without him.”

Namjoon is the one who tugs Jimin into a tight hug, sandwiching him in between Yoongi and himself. Jimin covers his mouth and more tears escape. Jungkook feels his heart clench tightly, and a whimper leaves his throat. Hoseok scoots closer hugging the youngest into his chest.

“You’re not the only ones he's helped,” Yoongi mutters.

“It’s not bad, per say it’s just… something. When Jungkook and I met he was drawing me in the library, I remember how embarrassed he got when I caught him in the act. It was a beautiful drawing, and I remember wishing I could have that same passion I saw in him.”

Jungkook looks to Yoongi in surprise. He’s never thought that way about himself, and hearing Yoongi of all people say that makes his chest tingle.

“I was struggling with an assignment at one point. It was killing me. I couldn’t sleep, couldn’t eat, and was in such a rut I didn’t realize how bad it was becoming. Kook-ah noticed though. He brought me snacks and listened to my music. He didn’t just offer praise blindly. He took time to listen to it and give me the advice I needed,” Yoongi tells them.

He gives Jungkook a grateful smile, “I got a good grade on that project by the way.”

Jungkook smiles warmly towards his hyung, and waits for the next person to speak.

Jin smiles before talking slowly, “We all know how I got to where I am today. My parents cut me off because I didn’t want to follow their plan for me. It was hard for me, but I got through it. My parents and siblings would come in to torture me though. It was difficult, and made working so very hard.”

“Jungkook though…”

Jin grins, “He kind of became my guard dog.”

The others chuckle at that, and Jungkook gives Jin a soft smile.

“He started protecting me from their glares, started helping me let their comments roll off my back, but the day that really got me was when he punched my brother in the face,” Jin tells them.

“He what?” Namjoon asks surprised.

Jin laughs, “You heard me, he punched him right in the face, broke his nose I’m pretty sure. Jungkook was reckless, but I was so happy. I haven’t seen any of them after that.”

Jungkook grins at this, he’s overjoyed his reckless actions did pay off in the end. Jin stares at him with loving eyes, and Jungkook feels his heart skip a beat.

Jungkook looks expectantly at Namjoon who shrugs, “Let’s face we ALL know what Jungkook did for me.”

He turns to look Jungkook right in the eyes though, “But I never explained how I felt about it.”

“Kookie, you risked everything that night. You could’ve been seriously hurt, and yet you sprung into action. You helped my mom get better, made us food, and when I saw you sucker punch that asshole I wasn’t sure what to think. You were a complete stranger and yet I felt like I always knew you.”

“You were this kid who acted like a grown up at some moments, and then this brat who loved to tease us.”

Jungkook felt a smile form across his face.

“He would stay up late talking to me, listening to me ramble, and I realized then how much this kid wormed his way into my heart,” he finishes with a smile.

Jungkook again feels his chest tighten, and his face heats up when he sees that smile directed towards him. He looks down at his lap before finally turning to look at Hoseok. Hobi smiles at Jungkook with a sad look.

“I know most of you know about my scars, I don’t actively try to hide them but… I think it’s time I tell you why.”

He looks to Namjoon and Yoongi, who nod to him. There is some silent agreement there, some kind of pact the three have made. Jungkook connects it to the same pact Jimin, Tae, and he share.

Finally Hobi speaks, “In highschool I was diagnosed with severe depression. Everything felt like too much. I started to forget how to feel things, and I just felt like this blob floating in the world. One day I accidently cut my hand on a box cutter. I remember feeling the pain and seeing the blood, and I realized I felt something again.”

“From there it escalated. I couldn’t stop I knew it was bad, but I was feeling again. When I ran out of room on my arms I went to my thighs, and before I knew it I was almost addicted to the pain. Yoongi, Namjoon, and I went to the same school. Namjoon befriended me, but I made it very hard. Soon enough I was sitting with Namjoon and Yoongi during lunch and talking to them during the day.”

Hoseok pauses for a moment his voice breaking, “But one day, one day Namjoon saw. I remember his face, he was horrified yes, but what caught my attention was how his eyes conveyed so much sadness too. He made me promise to stop, and I knew I couldn’t agree to that.”

“The process was long, so incredibly so I thought it would never stop. Soon enough though it was becoming easier. I got back into dancing, and started rapping along with Namjoon and Yoongi.”

Hoseok now had tears streaming down his face, “I still struggle though. Sometimes things become too much, and I can’t even get out of bed. But then Jimin brought Jungkook to our dance club, and the boy integrated himself so well I was surprised Jimin didn’t bring him sooner. Jungkook was sweet if not a bit shy, well I suppose until he showed his true colors as a total brat.”

Everyone laughs at that, and Jungkook gives Hobi a smirk. Hoseok runs a hand through his hair, and chuckles.

“Jungkook noticed the scars, I knew he did, but he didn’t stare with disgust just this understanding look that frightened me. When days became too much Jungkook would leave these care baskets by my door, hug me extra tight when he next saw me, and would take me out to dinner every once in a while.”

Hoseok grabs Jungkook’s hand and looks him in the eyes. Jungkook feels his whole body tingle from the warmth of Hobi’s hand.

“You made me feel alive Kookie, and for the first time it was through absolute complete love, so thank you so much. You’re kind of my hero Kook-ah,” he tells the boy.

Jungkook swallows thickly. He wasn’t expecting this. Wasn’t expecting all of them to look at him like this. Like he was their entire world, and maybe he was. Jungkook felt his eyes water, and he clutched at his heart for a moment. Everything felt like too much then, but he had so many things he wanted to say.

“Hyungs I- When I first met each one of you I wanted to know everything about you. Each one of you was different, and always peaked my interest. I started to view you as my family, and seeing you struggle began to hurt me so bad.”

Jungkook feels his cheeks get wet, and he desperately tries to wipe them away.

“Because, I can’t sit here and edure watching you each suffer. I can handle tough workouts, stupid projects, or rainy days, but seeing you struggle like that broke my heart. I care about you all so much. I know you all notice how my parents aren’t around, but I don’t need them. I have a family right here that I love so much.”

Jungkook’s breath hitches, and a sob escapes his mouth. He tries to stifle it, but Hoseok is dragging him back resting his palms on his back and rocking him back and forth. Jungkook stays like that for a while until he lets a yawn escape his mouth.

“I think our maknae is getting sleepy,” Hoseok tells the others.

They all hum in response, and Hoseok gently lifts Jungkook up and takes him towards his room. Hobi sets him on the bed, and goes to leave when a hand grabs his shirt. Hoseok looks down to Jungkook who is looking at the ground pitifully, his face a red hue. Hoseok smiles at the maknae, and scoots him over.

“Thank you Hobi-hyung,” Jungkook tell him wrapping his arms around the elder.

“Always Kookie, you know your hyungs love you right?” he asks.

Jungkook nods, “I know Hobi-hyung. I love you guys too.”

Hobi smiles and kisses Jungkook’s head, “I love you very much Kook-ah.”

Jungkook feels his body light up. He understands what it means understands what’s been going on, but it doesn’t make sense. He shouldn’t be in love with six different people. It’s not normal, and Jungkook is scared about what it means. He has no idea what to do about it because he loves them all equally, but he also knows he can never have them all. They're his best friends, and he's terrified to ruin the relationship he has with them now.

Jungkook decides to just holds Hoseok closer.

_He’ll figure it out later..._

 

 

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The others grow closer as finals draw near, 
> 
> Jungkook has a run in with some old evils.

It’s the middle of the year, and Jungkook is suffering.

 

All of them are really.

 

With finals coming in just a week, everyone is in a mad dash to finish up projects, study for tests, and try to sleep in between. The only good thing that comes out of this week is Jin.

 

With Jin not attending college like the rest, he helps the boys study, and makes sure they get a proper meal.

 

When Jin finds out Namjoon isn’t properly taking care of himself he forces the boy to stay with him for the next two weeks. Namjoon whines about it stating he _has_ to work, but Jin is stubborn. He tells the boy, “If you can work at home, then you can work here too.”

 

He doesn't like to admit it, but Jin is a gift from God for Namjoon.

 

Yes he can be loud, annoying sometimes, but Jin has always had his back. Jin makes him meals every day, constantly checks up on him, and brings home pastries from work.

 

Jin checks on him one night, and sees the boy hunched over. Jin walks over and taps him on the shoulder. Namjoon looks up and shows his eyes extremely red and swollen.

 

“Joonie? What's wrong?” Jin asks sitting down next to him.

 

Namjoon sighs running a hand down his face, “It's okay Jin-hyung. Everything is just so stressful right now. If I'm not working on my music project, I'm studying for my philosophy final, or working to keep paying for college.”

 

Namjoon curls in on himself, “I just don't know what to do anymore hyung. Everything seems to be crashing down on me, and it feels like I'm drowning.”

 

Jin’s eyes soften. He leans forward and runs a hand through Joon’s hair.

 

“Want to disappear for a bit?” He asks the younger.

 

Namjoon looks up, “Disappear?”

 

Jin gives him a warm smile, “Yup, to a place you won't have to worry about any of this.”

 

Namjoon smirks, “You’re making it sound like you’re gonna kill me, hyung.”

 

“Yah! I'm trying to be all nice right now!” Jin retorts smacking Joon lightly.

 

In the end Jin takes Namjoon on a walk. It's a nice night out, if not a bit chilly, but Namjoon tries to relax for a moment. He tries to believe he doesn't have anything to do but enjoy this night.

 

They stop at a restaurant, and Jin treats him with a smile. Namjoon loves the food, but honestly? He thinks Jin’s home cooking is way better.

 

With their bellies full, Jin takes Namjoon back home.

 

However he does take a slight detour. Jin walks through the park with Joon, and lets the sounds wash over them. Namjoon looks up towards the sky before closing his eyes.

 

If he just listens to the animals and trees rustling, it's almost like he's not even in the city.

 

Namjoon sighs contentedly when he hears a voice. He opens his eyes and turns around looking for the source. He then looks up to see Jin singing very softly to himself or maybe to the animals. Namjoon has heard Jin sing before, but for some reason in that moment… it's like he's listening to an angel.

 

The moonlight shines upon them both, and Namjoon feels a smile form on his face. He watches Jin carefully, and waits for the other to notice. When Jin stops singing, he turns to see Namjoon watching him intently.

 

“Ah! Sorry I was just… uhm-”

 

“You sounded beautiful hyung,” he tells the elder.

 

Jin pauses and looks up at Joon. His cheeks turn slightly red before he looks away.

 

“Thank you Joon-ah…” he whispers.

 

Namjoon smiles, “It's no problem hyung.”

 

The two make eye contact and there's this subtle understanding between the two. Jin smiles warmly, and holds out his hand.

 

“Let's go home shall we?”

 

And for some reason, Namjoon can't stop smiling at the _home_ part of that sentence.

 

Namjoon is still extremely stressed about his final grade, but Jin is there listening to the track. He gives Namjoon his own advice, and they talk about it.

 

Finally Namjoon comes to the decision to use Jin as a vocal in the background. Jin is honestly horrified and claims he has no musical ability. Namjoon knows thats a big fat lie however, and forces the eldest to come to a studio. Jin’s nerves are all over the place, but Namjoon gives him encouragement.

 

Jin starts singing, he tries to control his pitch, and follow along the beat. They do multiple takes, until Namjoon hears it. He hears the perfect one. Jin getting over his nerves finally lets his voice out. It’s as beautiful as Namjoon remembered it being.

 

With that Namjoon takes the recording and starts putting the track together. Jin watches anxiously most of the time, still unsure if his singing was good enough.

 

At one point in the week Jin returns home from work very frustrated. A customer kept complaining her drink was wrong even though she drank the whole thing. He couldn’t give her a refund, so she started screaming and stormed out. Everyone was in complete shock, and Jin wiped a hand down his face.

 

He collapses on the couch screaming into the pillows.

 

“Jesus, what happened to you?”

 

Jin looks to the side, and sees Namjoon raising an eyebrow at him. Jin sits up setting the pillow in his lap.

 

“Oh you know, just the usual customers thinking they can con me into giving them a refund,” Jin mutters angrily.

 

Namjoon sits on the chair across from him, “That bad huh?”

 

“YES! Oh my gosh, she just wouldn’t stop screaming! She kept on complaining her order was wrong even though she DRANK THE WHOLE THING!!” Jin starts yelling.

 

He then brings the pillow to his face and screams even louder. Namjoon holds back a laugh, and watches the elder fondly.

 

“Do you wanna disappear for a bit?” He asks.

 

Jin looks up and smiles, “Disappear where?”

 

Namjoon smiles back, “Come with me.”

 

Namjoon surprises Jin by grabbing his hand, and walking outside. It’s cold outside, and Jin pulls his coat tight around him.

 

Namjoon takes Jin towards the docks. He sits down, letting his feet dangle over the water.

 

“Why here Joon-ah?” Jin asks turning towards him.

 

Namjoon takes a deep breath, “My mom used to take me here when I was younger.”

 

Jin sits beside him and hums, “Did you have some pretty good memories here?”

 

Namjoon laughs, “Nope I almost drowned once.”

 

Jin looks at him incredulously, “Then why take us here?”

 

“Because despite that scary memory, I learned how to swim,” he replies.

 

Namjoon continues, “Sure I was terrified, but then I started kicking and moving my legs. I realized I could swim, and so I swam right back to my mother who was already swimming towards me too.”

 

“Well I'm glad you didn't drown,” Jin tells him.

 

Namjoon chuckles, “I’m telling you this for a reason hyung.”

 

Jin looks at him expectantly.

 

“I'm just saying you have a similar experience maybe it's not as literal, but you were drowning in all of your families insults,” Namjoon looks at him.

 

Jin looks down and smiles sadly. Namjoon grabs his shoulder, and Jin looks at him with a real smile.

 

“You got through that situation and made something out of it. I can't imagine having no one during those times, but you.. Jin you did it, you followed your dreams, and that always amazed me,” Namjoon tells him looking the elder in the eyes.

 

Jin swallows thickly, “Joon-ah.. I… Thank you. Those times were hard, but honestly if I hadn't met you and the others I'm not sure it would've worked out.”

 

“What do you mean hyung?” Joon asks.

 

“The three of you inspired me. Each one of you had completely different backgrounds, but you were making it work,” he tells him.

 

“I inspired you?” Namjoon looks at him with wide eyes.

 

Jin laughs, “Of course you did.”

 

“Namjoon you… you always inspired me the most. I had all the money in the world, but you were in a completely different situation. Still you were so passionate, and I couldn't stop admiring you,” Jin says with a smile.

 

“You followed your dreams despite every obstacle that came your way. I knew my family was going to torment me. I had no doubt about it, but seeing you work so hard everyday gave me that boost to continue on,” the elder tells him.

 

Namjoon pauses looking at Jin thoughtfully. It surprises them both that they had similar thoughts about the other. Both were so passionate about their career choices, and somehow they both are making it work. Yes the pair struggled a lot financially and emotionally, but they also both made it. Namjoon grabs Jin’s hand, and the elder squeezes it tightly. Jin gives him a warm smile, and Namjoon returns it with fervor.

 

“Thanks Joonie,” Jin tells him.

 

“It's no problem hyung,” he replies.

 

The two walk back to Jin's apartment both smiling and laughing with the other. Jin feels so much more relaxed after the outing, and his heart feels fuller. Namjoon can’t stop smiling, and he lets his body drift closer to the oldest. If either one of them notice how close they’re walking together, they decide not to mention it.

 

It's a week after finals have finished, and Jin tells the others it's time to celebrate. He doesn't give anyone the option to decline, so on Friday night everyone gets together at Jin's apartment.

 

Hoseok and Yoongi arrive together the pair laughing and joking with one another. Jin takes notice how Yoongi stares fondly at Hobi, and the latter looks at Yoongi the same way when he isn’t looking.

 

Jin decides he’ll address that later, and waits for the others to arrive. Jimin and Taehyung come next the pair all smiles. Jin notices how the two are practically hanging off the other, and how their normal smiles are more softer and more directed at the other. The two run towards the couch and animatedly talk to the older boys. Jin rolls his eyes and keeps on making dinner.

 

A few minutes later there's a knock on the door. Jin opens up to see Namjoon with a vase and flowers. Namjoon looks _very_ embarrassed, but still holds out the vase to Jin.

 

“I wanted to thank you for everything…” Namjoon tell him.

 

Jin gives him a bright smile, “Joonie! That's so sweet of you!!”

 

Jin hugs the boy tightly and pecks him on the cheek, “Come on! I'm making dinner.”

 

The two go to the kitchen, Jin missing Namjoon blushing face. Jin doesn’t let him help make dinner due to past… experiences, but regardless Jin lets the younger keep him company.

 

“Jin-hyung?”

 

The oldest looks at Namjoon expectantly, “What is it Joonie?”

 

Namjoon stuffs his hands in his pocket, “So uh, my teacher listened to my track…”

 

Jin sucks in a breath, “W-What did he say?”

 

Jin studies the boy carefully, but Namjoon shows no sign of happiness or despair. He simply looks at the elder. Jin can see thoughts swirling in his head, but doesn’t have the power to see what it is. Namjoon finally takes Jin’s hands in his own.

 

“To be honest?”

 

“We killed it,” Joon tells him with a grin.

 

Jin lets out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding, “Namjoon-ah! That’s fantastic!!”

 

Namjoon laughs and hugs Jin tightly. Jin returns the hug, and picks Namjoon up slightly. The pair stays like that simply soaking in the others warmth. Namjoon then leans back staring Jin in the eyes. He feels his chest get tight, and then swallows thickly. Jin feels his face burn, and he realizes exactly how _close_ he is with the younger.

 

“Uh, sorry Joonie, didn’t mean to get so uh in your space,” Jin laughs awkwardly.

 

Namjoon turns bright red, “No! It’s okay hyung, uh, I mean it was nice…”

 

He mutters the last bit of that to himself, and Jin feels his ears burn. The two spare one last glance towards the other when the doorbell rings again. Jin very happy to get out of this, awkward, situation runs towards the door. He flings it open, and Jungkook is standing there.

 

However,

 

_He doesn’t look so good._

 

_-_

 

Yoongi is about to rip his hair out.

 

He has so much pent up frustration due to his final, and there are so many students going around the library. Normally Yoongi can handle a few students, but there are multiple sitting at his table. They shake the table wildly, and Yoongi feels like he's about to blow any second.  

 

“Yoongi-hyung?”

 

He expects it to be Jungkook however the voice is different. Yoongi looks behind him to see Hoseok staring at him.

 

“Ah, Hobi what are you doing here?” Yoongi asks.

 

Hoseok beams, “Well, I was coming here for some peace and quiet, but it doesn't seem like that's going to be an option right now.”

 

Yoongi growls, “Yeah I _know_.”

 

“All of these kids are about to die if they don't stop _shaking_ this table,” he finished.

 

Hoseok gives the elder a look, “No murdering Yoongi-hyung. We've talked about this.”

 

Yoongi rolls his eyes, “No, _you_ talked about it I just sat there.”

 

Hobi places his hands on his hips, “Well ignoring that very rude comment, would you like to go somewhere else?”

 

Yoongi looks up at him, “Where?”

 

Hobi grins and starts picking Yoongi’s stuff up. Yoongi stuffs his laptop and equipment in his bag before looking at Hoseok expectantly. The boy beams, and then grabs the elder excitedly. Yoongi shakes the boy off of him, and crosses his arms across his chest.

 

Yoongi and Hoseok don't hang out that much.

 

Yes Yoongi was there during high school, but most of that involved Namjoon rather than Yoongi. That doesn't mean they don't like each other though. Hoseok really respects Yoongi, and it's the same for the other. It's just that… well they’re kind of opposites.

 

Yoongi is tired, sleepy most days, and Hoseok can't keep still. Yes there are days when Hoseok can't even move, but with the others he's bubbly and carefree. Yoongi wishes he could be like that, but he also doesn't know how.

 

In the end Hoseok takes him to his dance studio.

 

Yoongi raises an eyebrow, “Why are we here?”

 

Hobi smiles, “Well no one is here today, so you should be able to get some peace and quiet.”

 

Yoongi stares at him for a moment, but Hoseok just opens the door and walks inside. Yoongi pulls a face before walking inside as well. Hoseok stands in front a door, and opens it for Yoongi.

 

Despite how much everyone loves to see Hobi dance, only Jungkook and Jimin have actually been to the dance studio. It's very spacious Yoongi notes, and it's also completely away from prying eyes, he smiles to himself before sitting down and getting his things out.

 

Hoseok smiles happily and then walks out the door. As Yoongi works on his project he starts to hear other music playing, music that isn't his own. Yoongi tries to ignore the curiosity that's brewing in his mind, but soon enough he's standing and walking towards the room next door.

 He opens it quietly to see Hoseok dancing, his eyes widen as the man moves to the beat. Namjoon and Yoongi have seen him dance before, but at that moment it feels like Yoongi’s experiencing it for the first time.

Hoseok is incredible, always has been. Yoongi can't keep his eyes of the man, and when he finishes Yoongi starts clapping. Hobi jumps and turns to see Yoongi watching.

 “Ah! Hyung, sorry if the music distracted you I was going over choreography for our dance recital,” Hoseok tells him.

 

Yoongi nods, “I doubt you have much to worry about Hobi, your amazing. That routine was incredible.”

 

Hoseok glows, “Thank you hyung! I really do appreciate it.”

 

Yoongi smiles, “No problem Hobi, I'm gonna go back to work. Don't let me distract you.”

 

Hoseok laughs, “If anyone's distracting the other it'll be me hyung.”

 

Yoongi smiles before patting Hoseok on the shoulder. He walks back to his room still thinking of Hoseok’s performance. The boy was always talented. In that moment however, Yoongi could feel all of the energy Hoseok held.

 

Yoongi grins before sitting down and writing the rest of his song. He feels more energized and prepared to continue despite his shitty start of a day.

 

When it becomes evening Hoseok drags him out to dinner. Yoongi never realized how nice it would be to hang out one on one with the other. They've been friends for years, but normally Namjoon would be there with them.

 

“Yoongi-hyung, it was nice hanging out with you today,” Hobi tells him.

 

Yoongi smiles, “It was pretty nice. Honestly I expected you to be a lot for annoying.”

 

Hobi pouts, “That wasn't very nice of you hyung.”

 

Yoongi laughs, “Hyungs sorry. Come on, are we eating or not?”

 

Hobi beams, “I'll forgive you.”

 

“As long as you pay~” Hobi sings to him.

 

“Ya!” Yoongi shouts smacking the younger lightly.

 

Hoseok laughs and throws and arm around Yoongi. The gesture makes Yoongi smile a bit more, and he walks with Hoseok to the restaurant.

 

Hoseok chats idly with him most of the night, and Yoongi can't stop listening. Hoseok talks about the dance recital coming up, songs he's been listening to, and songs he's been trying to write.

 

“Wait you've been writing music?” Yoongi asks.

 

Hoseok looks up, “Oh uh yeah. It's not much, but I've been practicing a bit.”

 

Yoongi pats him on the back, “Let me listen sometime, you always put 110% effort in everything so I'm sure it'll be just a good.”

 

Hoseok blushes, “Oh uh, thanks hyung.”

 

By the time they finish their food it's already bedtime for Hoseok. Yoongi takes note of the tired boy, and guides him back towards his home. Hoseok leans against Yoongi heavily, and the elder can't help but smile.

 

He maneuvers them both inside and gently sets Hoseok on the bed. Hobi still clings to Yoongi tightly, and the boy struggles in getting him to let go.

 

“Hobi-ah, I need to go home,” he tells the sleepy boy.

 

Hoseok whines, “Hyungggg please stay with me? You're so warm.”

 

Yoongi feels his face burn, and if Hoseok was awake he'd be blushing too. Yoongi grumbles and pushes the younger over. The others have all cuddled with the boy, but Yoongi has never tried to do it.

 

Namjoon and Hoseok were always close especially during high school, Jin was always so sweet to everyone and loved hugging Hobi, when Tae and Jimin came along it was no surprise the three would get along. They were all energy and smiles. Each of them loved hugs, and never were bothered with close contact. With Jungkook it was similar, the boy could be shy yes, but Yoongi knew he grew acquainted to cuddles through Jimin and Taehyung.

 

Yoongi doesn't mind it really. He just isn't used to it. Yes, Yoongi will pretend to scowl and grumble at affection, but honestly he likes it. Like knowing that he isn't alone.

 

Hoseok always did a good job of doing that.

 

As Yoongi looks down at the younger boy he feels a soft smile spread across his face. Yoongi shifts closer running a hand through Hobi’s hair, and humming himself to sleep.

 

The next morning has Yoongi trapped beneath a body. He blearily rubs his eyes, and looks at the clock. It’s only 11 at this point, and Yoongi decides sleeping more sounds like a _great_ idea. It isn’t long after Hoseok is roused from his slumber. He looks down at Yoongi and nuzzles into him.

 

_Wait._

 

_What?!_

 

Hoseok raises up abruptly causing Yoongi to stir. Hobi frantically tries to get up and off the sleeping boy, but his hand slips and he’s tumbling to the ground. With a loud thud Hoseok slams into the ground groaning. Yoongi wakes up hearing the loud noises, and looks down at Hobi.

 

“What the _hell_ are you doing,” Yoongi asks, eyes squinting in confusion.

 

“Uh, sitting?” he replies sheepishly smiling.

 

Yoongi’s mouth pulls down, and Hoseok notices how adorable that is.

 

“So, Yoongi-hyung, would you like to have breakfast?” Hobi asks.

 

Yoongi stretches, “Sure, what do you have?”

 

Hoseok takes him to the kitchen and pulls out eggs, bread, and ham.

 

“Well I’ve got this,” Hobi tells him with a smile.

 

Yoongi yawns, “Sounds, good. You know how to cook?”

 

Hoseok gives him a look, “You make it sound like I’m still in high school hyung.”

 

Yoongi huffs out a laugh, “Sorry Hobi, that uh, sounds good.”

 

Hoseok smiles widely before turning the stove on. Yoongi sits down and watches Hobi start to cook. As Hoseok cooks he starts to dance around the kitchen, and Yoongi starts smiling. He listens to the younger hum a song, and swing around the floor. Soon enough Hobi is grinning wildly at the elder, and starts singing one of his songs. Yoongi laughs and then joins in.

 

The two boys start yelling out the verses, and Hobi drags Yoongi off the chair. The pair starts dancing, and Hoseok grabs Yoongi’s hands. He spins him around, twirls him out, and pulls him back in. Hoseok pulls him in a bit too fast, and Yoongi bumps noses with the other. Despite how close he is, Yoongi still laughs loudly and holds onto Hobi’s arms.

 

The two look at one another smiles on their faces. Hoseok’s eyes glow, and Yoongi can’t stop looking at them.

 

That’s when they smell the burning.

 

The two so lost in their moment, forgot about the food being cooked. The alarms start going off and Hobi shrieks. Yoongi frantically grabs a broom as Hoseok puts out the very small fire. Yoongi starts waving the smoke away from the smoke detector, and Hobi tries to help grabbing a towel and waving it wildly.

 

When the machine stops screaming at them, the two look to each other. Hoseok blinks at him for a moment before bursting into a fit of giggles. Yoongi looks at him with wide eyes before feeling his mouth curl up.

 

The two start laughing uncontrollably, and Hoseok hugs the other tightly.

 

“Oh my god hyung I can’t stop laughing- but also I am so sorry oh my god,” Hoseok tell him trying to stop the laughter.

 

Yoongi pats him on the back, “It’s fine Hobi, god, I wasn’t expecting this to be my day, but honestly it’s incredible.”

 

Hoseok laughs, “I’m glad I could share this experience with you hyung, however it looks like breakfast is canceled.”

 

“Well I think I’ll survive one morning without breakfast,” the other replies.

 

“Hyunggg what about me?” Hobi whines.

 

Yoongi smacks him, “Ya! You almost kill us and you still want food?”

 

Hoseok looks at him cheekily. His dimples popping up on his face. Yoongi feels something stir with inside him. It’s warm, fuzzy, and soft all at the same time. Yoongi smiles back, and when Hoseok sees the elder's gummy smile his heart gets warm and fuzzy too. The pair take a moment to look the other in the eyes. Something changes there, and neither of them know how to say it, or what to do about it.

 

In the end they seperate, and continue on throughout the next two weeks. Their hangouts increase to everyday, and the pair grow accustomed to each others presence. When Yoongi finishes his final track, Hoseok is the first to hear. Hoseok absolute adores the new song, and he tells the elder many many times. Yoongi takes time to believe him, but Hoseok is determined to convince him.

 

Yoongi is also the first to see Hoseok’s full performance, and listen to his music. Hoseok amazes him over and over again, and once more Yoongi feels like he’s getting to know him all over again.

 

“Hey Yoongi-hyung!”

 

The boy turns to see Hobi sprinting towards him. Yoongi watches him come to a sudden stop, and smile brightly.

 

“You’re on our way to Jin-hyung’s right?” Hoseok asks.

 

Yoongi stuffs his hands in his pocket, “Yeah, there’s no saying no to the guy.”

 

Hoseok pokes him in the side, “You’re only saying that, you love hanging out with everyone.”

 

Hoseok is met with a pinch to the side, and the boy yelps. Regardless the two walk together all the way to Jin’s house. When the oldest opens the door, Hoseok and Yoongi walk inside laughing at an inside joke between the two. Hobi laughs brightly and Yoongi looks at him softly. He gets that warm feeling again, and smiles warmly towards the other. When Yoongi turns away Hoseok looks at him warmly a puzzled, yet happy expression on his face.

 

Taehyung and Jimin arrive next, and a certain boy slams into the pair. Yoongi and Hoseok groan underneath Tae, and Yoongi shoves him off. The four boys talk for a bit, before Namjoon arrives. Yoongi takes notice how he immediately follows the oldest into the kitchen, and doesn’t even greet anyone else. Hoseok also hears excited yelling from Jin, and the pair laughing together.

 

When the doorbell rings Jin immediately runs for the door. Yoongi and Hoseok are both very excited to see the youngest since he’s been busy with school lately.

 

But then Jin is screaming, Namjoon is sprinting forward, and Yoongi is up up up. Hoseok is faster though, and his eyes widen in horror. When Yoongi gets over he sees why everyone is screaming. He’s quick to grab Tae and push him back because the boy shouldn’t have to see him like that.

 

_There’s blood everywhere._

 

-

 

Taehyung is bored.

 

He’s working on his fashion project for school, and no one is here to keep him company. Jungkook is off doing god knows what, Jin is busy with work, Namjoon is being taken care of by Jin, Yoongi is stressing over his track, Hoseok is busy working on his dance choreography, and Jimin…

 

Wait, Taehyung doesn’t know what Jimin’s doing!

 

Taehyung frantically grabs his phone and calls the boy.

 

Jimin answers on the seconds ring, “TaeTae! What are you up to?”

 

“Hyungggg I’m so booored,” Taehyung whines.

 

Jimin laughs, “Well we can’t have that now can we? What do you wanna do Tae?”

 

Taehyung thanks the heavens for Jimin’s kindness, “Hyung you’re my absolute savior, and I know it’s not that exciting but could you come home?”

 

Jimin pauses, “Of course Tae! I’m just surprised you wouldn’t rather go out.”

 

“Yeah, but I have to work on this outfit for class,” he tells him.

 

Jimin chuckles, “Okay! I’ll be home in a few minutes okay?”

 

Taehyung says goodbye before hanging up. Living with Jimin and his family is amazing. He still sees his sister all the time, but with Jimin he can just be a kid again. Jimin takes care of him, keeps him company, and makes him laugh. Taehyung and Jimin have always been close, they’re practically family at this point.

 

Lately however…

 

Taehyung’s been feeling weird.

 

He always feels warm and fuzzy around everyone in their group, but with Jimin and Jungkook specifically, weird things always seem to happen. Jungkook made Taehyung feel like that all the time, but he assumed that’s what having friends was like. When Jimin came along the feeling grew to be the same, but with the others it took longer to get to that point. Taehyung doesn’t really know why he feels these things, especially when with other friends Taehyung doesn’t feel like that yet.

 

Before he can continue, Taehyung’s thoughts are interrupted by the door opening.

 

“Jiminnie!!” Taehyung squeals launching at the other.

 

Jimin laughs and easily catches the younger of the two. The boys have grown used to the others antics and quirks. Jimin loves listening to Taehyung talk, his hugs, and lovely eyes.

 

“What are you working on Tae?” Jimin asks curiously.

 

Taehyung beams, “Come see!! Would you be down to model? You have a similar waist size as the model.”

 

Jimin blinks, “Uh sure Tae.”

 

Jimin is dragged towards the middle of the room, and Taehyung helps him into the pants. Jimin notes how well they fit, and how the fabric is nice on his legs. Taehyung grabs some pins and starts measuring around. He has Jimin stand like this for a while, and the boy has no clue if he should stay quiet or not.

 

“Jiminnie you can talk you know,” Taehyung states.

 

Jimin feels his cheeks grow warm, “It's hyung to you!”

 

Taehyung simply smiles to himself and continues on.

 

“Well, moving on… have you been doing this all day Tae?” Jimin asks.

 

Taehyung nods, “Yup, but it's hard to get work done with nothing to keep me entertained.”

 

Jimin laughs, “Most people need to not be interrupted by things when they're working.”

 

“And I think it's well established I'm not most people,” Taehyung quips back.

 

The two look at each other, and Jimin grins in response.

 

“I suppose that's true, would explain a l- Ow!”

 

Taehyung pokes Jimin with a pin, and chuckles awkwardly, “Oh, sorry hyung.”

 

Jimin pouts at him, “Hey that was rude.”

 

Taehyung tries not to giggle, “I know hyung, I really didn't mean to.”

 

He whips out the puppy dog eyes, and attempts to persuade the other. Jimin rolls his eyes before sighing.

 

“ _Fine_ I'll forgive you,” he tells him.

 

Taehyung ‘whoops’ and then goes back to working. Jimin watches the younger boy with a smile. There are times like this when Jimin forgets how silly Taehyung can be. When he gets hyper fixated on something, he goes, and goes, and goes. Taehyung despite what others might going is an extremely hard and dedicated worker. He can act childish, make dumb decisions, but in the end Tae just as dedicated as the rest.

 

It's one reason why Jimin respects the boy so much. His hyungs are amazing, literally so incredible, have you _seen_ Hobi dance?

 

But his dongsaengs…

 

Gosh Jimin can't get enough of them.

 

Jimin remembers a lot of the bad things from high school, but Taehyung and Jungkook helped him survive. Of course there were other things going on for Taehyung too, but still the boy would put aside his things for a moment just to help him.

 

Jimin couldn't be more thankful.

 

Taehyung always tried to fight off his bullies, but Jimin knew of the abuse at home. He didn't want Tae to deal with abuse at school too. Taehyung always found his reasoning idiotic, but Jimin cares too much with has a tendency to forget about himself.

 

So yeah Taehyung,

 

He was kind of like a knight in shining armor.

 

Both boys were of course, but when Jimin imagines high school he can see Taehyung recklessly fighting off his enemies with a sword. However he can also see Jungkook in the background, plotting his own attack.

 

“Whatcha thinking about Jiminnie?”

 

Taehyung looks at him curiously his eyes glowing. Jimin licks his lips, unable to look away, and not able to form an answer.

 

“Oh- uh, just the past I guess?” Jimin asks rather than states.

 

Taehyung smiles, “I hope the good parts.”

 

“Both really,” Jimin tells him, “but mostly the good.”

 

Both boys look at the other, an understanding look between the two. Taehyung’s eyes soften, and he sets the tools down for a moment. He silently leans forward and wraps his arms around Jimin’s waist. Jimin looks down at the boy unsure how to hug back while standing, so instead he runs a hand through his hair.

 

“I like the good,” Tae mumbles.

 

Jimin hums, “Me too, Tae, me too.”

 

Taehyung leans back grabbing Jimin’s hands in his own. He looks up at the other, those beautiful eyes sparkling. His face glows with the most beautiful smile Jimin has ever seen, and suddenly his chest gets tight. It’s not bad, not at all, but Jimin pauses, trying to decipher what it means. But with Taehyung smiling at him like this, he decides to think about it later. Jimin leans forward smacking his lips of Tae’s forehead, and hugging him close. Jimin feels so, so warm inside, and he’s not sure he’s ever felt so… whole.

 

When Jimin kisses Taehyung’s forehead, the boy knows he melts. Taehyung feels his whole body burn from the action, and even more so when Jimin leans forward to hold him. Jimin’s aroma is all around him, and Taehyung feels so overwhelmed and perfect at the same time. Taehyung pauses very confused by these feelings, he’s felt this before, but he still doesn’t understand why.

 

Taehyung decides that’s enough working for one day, and takes Jimin into their shared bedroom. Jimin’s parents were kind enough to get another bed for him, but most of the time Tae just sleeps with Jimin.

 

“So now what Tae?” Jimin asks curiously.

 

Taehyung rocks on his heels, “I don’t know, do you wanna play some video games?”

 

Jimin grins, “Only if you let me win at least a few times, everyone knows you play these everyday.”

 

“Hyung! I do not,” Taehyung pouts.

 

Jimin’s smile widens, “Don’t even try it, there is no denying this fact TaeTae.”

 

Taehyung wants to argue, but Jimin is then grabbing the console and remotes. He turns on the tv, and starts the game. Taehyung smiles gently before joining the other on the floor. Jimin is right really, Taehyung does play this everyday, and his skills prove it. Jimin tries to keep up with Taehyung’s attacks, but the other is as competitive as he is skilled. When Jimin loses for the 4th time in a row he looks at Taehyung with a big pout.

 

“TaeTae! I said to let me win a few times,” Jimin scolds him.

 

Taehyung laughs, “Aw, but what’s the fun in that Jiminnie?”

 

The other smacks him lightly, and Taehyung laughs loudly. The game starts again, and Taehyung notices how a smile has morphed on to Jimin’s face. Taehyung decides to focus on the game until he feels Jimin pressing closer into him. Taehyung can feel his skin light up from the slight touch. It only gets worse when Jimin presses closer and closer. Tae’s head gets fuzzy, and he feels his chest get tight.

 

Suddenly he’s pushed over, and Taehyung yelps. Jimin pushes him over, and then KO’s his character. He looks at the older boy, and sees Jimin trying to stifle a laugh. Taehyung smirks, and then he’s tackling the boy. Jimin yells, and the pair roll around the room. There’s no hitting, no yelling, just two giggling boys rolling around the floor together.

 

When they finally stop, their chests hurt, their eyes water from laughter, and they are holding onto the other tightly. Taehyung opens his eye to look at Jimin underneath him. When he does Jimin is already staring at him, a fond look in his eyes. Taehyung feels his throat get tight, and his cheeks get warm.

 

When Jimin opens his eyes, he sees Taehyung huffing out air and laughing. He smiles softly at the other, and watches as Taehyung’s eyes meet his own. Tae pauses there looking at Jimin so softly. Jimin feels his heart beat spike, and his face get very warm.

 

The two boys stare at each other like that for god knows how long. They aren’t bothered by the close contact, never have been, but there’s something there. Maybe it was always there, maybe it just showed up then, but the boys realize it together. They don’t realize that the other notices as well, but in that moment they continue to smile.

 

They’ll talk about this whole thing later.

 

When Taehyung finishes up his project, Jimin sees it first. It’s very beautiful the pattern for the pants, figuring out what color to make the shirt, and designing how it all looks. Taehyung did a fantastic job, and he hears it over and over again from Jimin. Taehyung in return is the first to see Jimin’s routine for school. It’s graceful, and soft, but the transforms into something hard and fast. The boys celebrate their victories on their own, before Jin tells everyone to come over a few days later.

 

Jimin and Taehyung of course go together, they’ve been attached to the hip these past two weeks. Jimin casually slots his hand into his own, and Taehyung tries not to think about how it makes him feel. The warmth spreads between the two, and the pair head to Jin’s their faces covered in smiles.

 

When Jin opens the door, the two greet him before going inside. Taehyung lets go only to tackle Yoongi and Hoseok, and then is back to Jimin sitting on the other couch with him. The pair presses close to one another, excitedly talking to the other two boys. Jimin takes notice how Hoseok looks at Yoongi differently, as if something occurred between the two. Taehyung is the one to notice how Yoongi stares at Hoseok a little differently too. When Namjoon arrives they all notice how he doesn’t even pay attention to them, but they’ll ask about that later.

 

When finally the doorbell rings one last time, Taehyung is on his feet ready to tackle the youngest. Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook haven’t been able to hang out lately due to school and Jungkook’s schedule. Suddenly though Jimin and Taehyung hear screaming. When Taehyung tries to rush forward, Yoongi is grabbing him. He’s being pushed back, but he sees Jimin’s expression. Sees the horrified look in his eyes as he whispers a name.

 

_“Jungkook no-”_

 

-

 

Jungkook is _dying_.

 

His finals are literally killing him, and sadly Namjoon cannot help due to his tendency to forget about basic human needs. Despite all of this Jungkook is studying hard, and working even harder on his projects. He decides last minute to join a study group when he realizes that he just _still_ isn’t getting these problems right.

 

“Are you here for the study group?”

 

Jungkook looks up to see a very tall boy, his bangs are in his face, and he has a very wide smile. Jungkook smiles politely and nods.

 

“Uh, yeah. The names Jungkook,” he tells him.

 

The boy grins rocking back on his heels, “I’m Yugyeom. It’s nice to meet you.”

 

Jungkook nods kind of stiffly, still unsure on how to interact with strangers. The boy doesn’t seem to mind though, he just gets out his own work. Jungkook watches him for a brief moment before trying to work on another problem. He gets stuck on it like he has for the fifth time, and rests his head in his hands.

 

“You stuck too?”

 

Jungkook looks up at the other boy, he’s smiling awkwardly. Jungkook smiles back.

 

“Uh, yeah number 18,” he tells him.

 

Yugyeom grins, “Yeah me too, I just suck at this.”

 

Jungkook laughs, “Me too, I was hoping more people would be here to help.”

 

“Yeah well, when I put out the flyer I expected more people to respond, but we can’t always get what we want,” Yugyeom shrugs.

 

Jungkook grins, “Well at least someone showed up, right?”

 

The other boy smiles, and then turns around his paper. The two work together in that library for hours. There are some arguments, times when they get super confused, and times when they aren’t working at all. Jungkook and Yugyeom barely manage to get through all of the problems, and even then they still get confused.

 

“Thanks for doing this Yugyeom, this really helped,” Jungkook tells him.

 

Yugyeom grins, “Well not sure if I really did much to help, but your welcome.”

 

The two wave goodbye, and Jungkook head home. With his finals just a few days away it's been complete study and project time for him. He's been working on stop, and if Jin could see him the younger knows he would be in deep shit.

 

When test time arrives Jungkook is mortified. He’s studied as hard as he could, but the nerves won’t stop. As he heads to class however, he sees Yugyeom walking towards him.

 

“You ready?” he asks.

 

Jungkook chuckles, “Not really? But I don’t have a choice in that do I?”

 

Yugyeom laughs, “Same here. You’ll do great Jungkook, I know it.”

 

“Same to you Yugyeom,” he tells him.

 

The two part ways, and then Jungkook squares his shoulders and prepares for the battle ahead. It’s unbearably quiet in the room, but Jungkook receives a series of texts.

 

_TaeTae (9:40)_

 

_Good luck Kookie!!_

 

_Jiminnie (9:41)_

 

_We love you Kookie!_

 

_Suga-hyung (9:41)_

 

_Good luck, brat._

 

_Sunshine-hyung (9:42)_

 

_You’re going to do such a good job Kookie!!_

 

_Jin-hyung (9:42)_

 

_I’ll have a big cake waiting for you when you’re done!!_

 

_Jin-hyung (9:43)_

 

_Everyone better be at my house later tonight._

 

_Rap Mon-hyung (9:45)_

 

_You’re going to do such a good job Jungkook-ah, you’ve studied really hard, and I know you’re going to do such a good job._

 

Jungkook feels his heart explode. His smile grows impossibly wide, and he feels as if he’s gotten a power boost. He sits down at his spot, and then looks up prepared for the rest of the day.

 

When the testing ends Jungkook feels like his mental capacity is down the drain, and like his limbs are going to fall off. He got through it though, and that’s all that mattered. Jungkook practically skips all the way home, and throws the door open.

 

Upon arriving however Jungkook hears voices. His head perks up and he walks to the kitchen.

 

“Mom?”

 

Jungkook's mother looks up from a magazine.

 

“Ah Jungkook, I see your finally home,” she replies.

 

Jungkook however is dumbfounded, “What are you doing home?”

 

His mother pauses, “I can't come home to visit my son?”

 

Jungkook feels his chest burn, “No, sorry, how are you?”

 

“Good,” his mother responds.

 

Jungkook takes a deep breath. He’s never known how to communicate with his parents, and with his mother just _attempting_ conversation means something is going on. Jungkook sits down at the table, and looks up at her.

 

“Where’s dad?” he asks.

 

She licks her lips, “Later Jungkook. We will talk about this later.”

 

Jungkook huffs out a laugh, and walks towards his room. If they don’t want to tell him right now, Jungkook isn’t going to try and get it out of them. He decided to bury himself in his work until the door opens. Jungkook looks up to see his father staring at him. Jungkook gets up, and watches his father leave.

 

“So, what’s going on?” he asks the pair.

 

Jungkook’s mother looks up at him, “We just wanted to check up on you.”

 

Jungkook tries not to scowl, “Okay… I’ve been doing good, college is treating me well.”

 

“Oh? When did you start college?” his father asks.

 

Jungkook balls his fists up, and takes in a deep breath, “Yes sir, started a few months ago.”

 

“You should’ve invited us to your graduation,” his mother tells him.

 

Jungkook tries not to scream.

 

“I uh did. I sent you the dates, and time,” he tells them.

 

“Oh that’s what those were?” his mother asks.

 

Jungkook grits his teeth, “Yes.”

 

“Well there’s always next time,” his father mutters.

 

Jungkook feels his palms get sweaty, his head start to hurt, and his chest get unbearably tight. His mother and father just stare at him. He feels bile rise up his throat, and all he wants are his friends. He wants his _real_ family. He wants the people he’s in love with to come and help him.

 

“Moving on, Jungkook we needed to talk to you about some boys coming over?”

 

Jungkook looks at his mother, “Why?”

 

“Well our neighbors saw a few of them acting really, ‘chummy’ with you, is there something you need to tell us?” his father asks.

 

Jungkook feels like the pair are ganging up on him and he panics, “No! They’re just my friends. We hang out a lot because it’s nice to have someone here!”

 

Jungkook’s father glowers at him, “And what did you mean by that?”

 

Jungkook looks up at him, and he feels that final rubber band snap.

 

“YOU’RE NEVER HERE!”

 

“You don’t tell me happy birthday, you don’t pay attention to me, you never come to any of my school events, and you didn't even know I was in college!!”

 

His father’s eyes widen, “How dare you speak to me like that!”

 

“Like what?! You have no right to talk to me at all!! You’re never here! You don’t care about me! All you care about is your FUCKING REPUTATION!!”

 

_SLAP_

 

Jungkook’s head whips around. His face feels hot, and his cheek hurts. He look forward to see his father’s furious expression. Jungkook feels a laugh bubble up his chest.

 

“See? What did I tell you? You don’t care about me at all,” he says with a growl.

 

_SLAP_

 

_PAO!_

 

_POP!_

 

Jungkook is hit three more times, and he tastes something metallic in his mouth. His face hurts even more, and Jungkook wonders if this is how it started for Taehyung. The quick slaps, the hurtful words. Jungkook feels his eyes water.

 

He just wants his friends.

 

He wants Taehyung’s smile.

 

He wants Jimin’s soft touches.

 

He wants Jin’s cooking.

 

He wants Yoongi’s rough voice.

 

He wants Hoseok hugs.

 

He wants Namjoon’s warm hands.

 

He wants his family, he wants his friends.

 

Jungkook slams into his father forcing him back into the wall. His father grabs him roughly by the neck, and pulls him back. Jungkook starts kicking and screaming. His mother is yelling, his father is punching, Jungkook is crying. He is thrown into the wall, and Jungkook feels glass press into his back. He glares at the taller man, and then starts running. He feels hands grab at him again, but Jungkook is running. He knows he won’t have time to unlock the door and keep on running, so Jungkook makes a last minute decision.

 

_He jumps out the window._

 

Glass shatters all around him, and Jungkook knows there are shards in his arms. His body slams into the ground, and he feels cuts spread all over him. Jungkook however can hear the door open, and he is up again. Jungkook hears the yelling of his parents, but no longer is concerned. He is running, running, and running.

 

Jungkook knows there is something wrong. He can feel how his legs burn, he can feel something wet dripping from his head, and he can feel the tears running down his cheeks.

 

He’s in so much pain, emotionally and physically, and all he wants is his friends. He wants them so bad. He knows he’s late, he knows that the others are going to panic, but he’s so scared.

 

Jungkook doesn’t exactly remember everything on the way. He remembers falling down a lot, and he remembers how cold it is.

 

Regardless Jungkook finds himself at the door of Jin’s apartment, and he feels so out of breath. His hand raises, and he’s knocking one, two, three.

 

Jungkook waits.

 

He prays.

 

And then the door is opened.

 

“Jungkook! What a- OH MY GOD!”

 

Jungkook hears screaming, and hands grab him. He’s being carried inside, and when he looks down he finally sees all of the red. His hands tremble as he grabs onto Jin’s shirt.

 

“Hyung- Hyung I’m so sorry,” he whispers.

 

Jin shakes his head, “Don’t apologize, don’t you ever, we’ll get you fixed up okay?”

 

Jungkook is set in the tub, and water is turned on. His back burns, and he tries to get away from the feeling. Hands hold him in place.

 

“I know it hurts Jungkook-ah, but you’ve gotta let us help,” Yoongi tells him.

 

Jungkook whines, but in the end relaxes into the soft touches. He feels someone take his clothes off slowly, and hears someone gasp. Jungkook opens his eyes, and he sees pink water flowing down the drain. There is a cloth being placed on his head, and Jungkook feels it sting.

 

“Shush, Kookie it’s okay,” Jimin crows at him.

 

Jungkook can feel more tears come, and he finally takes a deep breath to look at them all.

 

Jin and Yoongi are washing him off. Jimin his pressing a warm cloth onto his head with a very sad smile. Namjoon is holding his clothes, and holds a furious expression on his face. Hoseok and Taehyung however…

 

He doesn’t know where they are.

 

“Tae,” he rasps, “where’s Tae?”

 

Namjoon looks behind him, “He’s with Hobi Jungkook-ah. He’s not ready to see this right now.”

 

Jungkook whines, “Is he okay?”

 

“He’s okay baby, we’ve gotta worry about you now okay?” Jin tells him.

 

Jungkook bites his lip and nods. At one point he realizes he’s lifted up from the tub, and helped into warm clothes. Jimin wraps arms around him, and Jungkook is finally, finally able to see his reflection.

 

His face is bruised horribly, they are starting to turn purple, and there are cuts all over his body. He has a cut on his head which most likely caused all of the bleeding. Jimin and Yoongi help him up again, and Jungkook sees dark bruises on his ankle. He limps out of the bathroom, and crashes into the bed.

 

“Jiminnie, please, Tae, where is he?” Jungkook asks.

 

Jimin bites his lip, “Jungkook-”  


“Please- I need to see him, I’m sorry- I didn’t mean to- to-”

 

Jimin shushes him, “Kookie? It’s okay, none of this is your fault Tae just- He’s... “

 

“I’m here.”

 

Jungkook looks up hearing a voice crack. Taehyung is there with Hoseok. The pair are holding onto each other tightly, but Hoseok is the one keeping Taehyung up on his feet. Taehyung walks over slowly, and sits down on the bed. Jungkook looks at the other boy, Taehyung looks as if he’s been crying for hours, and Jungkook feels his heart break.

 

_“Tae, please, I’m sorry-”_

 

“No.” Taehyung says.

 

The boy wraps his arms around him, “Don't apologize. Don’t you _ever_ apologize for this, I’m going to kill whoever did this, I’m gonna _kill_ them.”

 

Jungkook grabs onto Taehyung, feeling tears start to stream down his face. Taehyung responds by wrapping arms around Jungkook tightly. Jungkook feels himself relax in the arms of his oldest friend. He feels Jimin’s hand card through his hair. He hears Hobi start humming a song. He smells Yoongi’s cologne.He listens to Namjoon and Seokjin talk to him, and Jungkook finally feels like he’s home.

 

Yes the events leading up were horrible, but Jungkook is with his family. He’s with the people he loves, and the people he’s in love with.

 

The one thing he can’t get out of his head is-

 

_Something’s changed between the others._


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jungkook's an idiot, the others are in love, and wow depression is a thing.

Over the next few weeks the boys refuse to leave Jungkook alone. It feels nice knowing they all care about him so much. However with them all together Jungkook is able to observe them all. He realized something had changed.

 

And now he knows what.

 

It starts with Yoongi and Hoseok.

 

He can see Hoseok’s bright smiles being directed at solely Yoongi. He can see how Yoongi’s eyes follow Hoseok everywhere. The pair are obviously interested in the other, and Jungkook hates how jealous he feels.

 

Then it was Namjoon and Jin.

 

Namjoon was way too obvious. He followed Jin like a love struck puppy, and Jungkook couldn't _believe_ Jin wasn't noticing it. Jin was pretty bad too though. He was always touching or hugging the other boy. He looked at Namjoon with so much love and care. Jungkook felt more jealousy wrap around his heart.

 

Finally it was Taehyung and Jimin.

 

Perhaps Jungkook noticed them first, and he just didn't want to admit it. The pair has always been touchy, but this was different. They seemed to always be having their own private conversation. Taehyung’s boxy smile never went away, but it was _only_ around Jimin. With the other boy Jungkook could only see how Jimin’s hands would always be holding Taehyung, messing with his hair, and pressed as close as he could.

 

Jungkook felt his heart crush after that.

 

Jimin wanted Jungkook to stay with him and Tae, but Jungkook claimed it would be too crowded.

 

_That wasn't why._

 

He decided to stay with Jin, until he could find an apartment and roommate. Jungkook hated how bad he was hurting. Hated how angry he was because it wasn't their fault. It was entirely his own.

 

What he hated the most however,

 

Was that he wanted them to be happy too.

 

Jungkook could see how happy they were with each other. Yes he was upset because it wasn't with _him,_ but Jungkook couldn't deny how happy they were. Jungkook's entire life revolved around helping his hyungs. Revolved around making them happy, so Jungkook decided something absolutely detrimental to his health. Something absolutely suicidal.

 

He would get them together.

 

Jungkook knew Taehyung and Jimin would be the hardest for him to get through. It was the same reason he decided to get them together first. Jungkook knew how much torture he would be putting himself through, but he decided to ignore it.

 

He calls Jimin one day, and asks to hang out. He claims he wants to go over some choreography, and to meet him for lunch.

 

Once Jimin arrived Jungkook can feel his total regret for this, but he chooses to ignore those feelings.

 

“So what's that choreography for Kookie?” Jimin asks.

 

Jungkook does everything he can to push away the sadness he's feeling, “Sorry hyung, I actually lied about that. I wanted to talk to you.”

 

Jimin changes his posture going into full ‘hyung’ mode, “What's wrong? Are you okay? Are your parents bothering you?”

 

Jungkook is badgered with a million questions, and Jungkook is only reminded more about how it's only ‘friendly’ concern. Once again Jungkook hates how jealous he feels.

 

“No, it's kind of about you,” he tells him.

 

Jimin's brows furrow, “What do you mean?”

 

Jungkook takes a deep breath, there's no turning back after this. He will have to deal with this regret and jealousy for years. He's going to have to crush all of those feelings, but Jungkook's given pieces of his heart to Jimin. He knows that there's no way to get them back.

 

“You're in love with Taehyung,” he tells Jimin bluntly.

 

Jimin's eyes widen and he sputters, “What?! No I'm not!!”

 

Jungkook smiles, “You know how observant I am hyung, you can't hide these things from me.”

 

Jimin looks down blushing, “Is it really that obvious.”

 

Jungkook bites his lip hard, Jungkook knew it, but hearing it be confirmed hurts even worse.

 

“Sorry hyung, but it is pretty obvious,” he tells him.

 

Jimin pouts, “Do you think Taehyung knows?”

 

Jungkook can't help but chuckle, “No, considering I see him pining just as much, and not asking you out.”

 

“Taehyung doesn't like me like that,” Jimin replies.

 

Jungkook raises an eyebrow, “Hyung, he absolutely does. I told you, I'm observant. I _see_ how much he likes you.”

 

Jimin shakes his head, “I know because he's in love with someone else.”

 

Jungkook blinks surprised, “What?”

 

Jimin nods, “Yup, he told me about it.”

 

“Why not me?” Jungkook asks.

 

Jimin shrugs, “He was embarrassed, and we were together one night and it just slipped.”

 

Jungkook is reeling, “Well I didn't know that, but that doesn't change anything. I can see him pining after you hyung, maybe he got over them?”

 

Jimin sighs, “I don't think so Kookie.”

 

Jungkook pouts, still unable to believe he didn't know about this. Regardless Jungkook _knows_ Taehyung likes Jimin, it's plain as day!

 

“Besides Taehyung would never like me regardless.”

 

Jungkook looks up at the older boy, “Why do you say that, hyung?”

 

“Look at me Kookie, I’m not much,” Jimin responds.

 

He looks at the ground pitifully, and rests his face on his hand. Jungkook decides fuck that, and kicks his angry and jealous feelings aside for a moment.

 

“Hyung, I don’t _ever_ want you to think about yourself like that.”

 

“You’re incredible, always have been! You’re so talented hyung, you’re beautiful, and the kindest, _sweetest_ person ever created.”

 

Jimin looks away blushing, “You’re only saying that be-”

 

“Nope! If you’re going to say something negative about yourself, you’re not allowed to speak,” Jungkook replies.

 

The older boy sighs, “You’re such a dork Kook-ah.”

 

“The sooner you realize how incredible you are, the sooner I stop being a dork,” he retorts.

 

Jimin laughs beautifully, “Yeah right, like that’ll happen. You’ll always be our shy, cute nerd.”

 

Jungkook feels his face heat up at _‘ours’._ Jimin’s giving him this smile, you know _the smile_ . It’s the one that melts Jungkook’s insides, and god Jungkook just wants to _kiss-_

 

Jungkook pats Jimin on the shoulder, “It'll work out hyung, I know it.”

 

Jimin nods, “Thank you Kook-ah, you’re a good friend.”

 

Jungkook swallows thickly, “You’re welcome hyung.”

 

The pair walk back to Jimin's house, and Jungkook can't stop thinking. Who does Taehyung like? Jungkook's always been so observant, and he's never known that. And also why hasn’t Jimin come to Jungkook sooner about those insecurities? He’s always been there for both of them...

 

_It hurts more than it should._

 

“Jiminie! Kookie!”

 

The pair look ahead at Taehyung running towards them. Jungkook automatically holds out his arms, but Taehyung dives towards Jimin. Jimin laughs, and catches the younger easily.

 

Jungkook feels bile rise up his throat.

 

Taehyung then turns to Jungkook smiling widely. Jungkook smiles back, unable to keep his own away upon seeing a the boys boxy smile.

 

“Where were you guys?” Taehyung asks.

 

Jimin smiles, “Kookie wanted to go over some choreography.”

 

“Ooh! What’s it for?” Taehyung asks, his eyes sparkling.

 

Jungkook feels his heart twist, “It's mainly for me, but I want to show our club something of my own.”

 

Taehyung pats Jungkook on the head, “That's awesome Kookie! I'm sure it'll be great.”

 

Jungkook despite how upset he is, feels warmth spread from Taehyung’s touch. He leans into it, and smiles sadly. The trio go inside and play games, but Jungkook can't keep his eyes off of them.

 

He feels like he’s losing something there. He knows he has to let go of them. This time however he’s letting go of those pieces of his heart. He's still hopelessly in love with them. That might never go away, but he needs to get over these feelings. He just has to pretend he's over them, and maybe one day it'll be real.

 

“Jungkook-ah, you've been really quiet, is everything okay?” Jimin asks.

 

Taehyung glances at him, “Yea normally you'd be whining about me winning so much.”

 

Jungkook sighs, “Sorry I'm just dealing with stupid feelings right now.”

 

“About your parents?” Taehyung asks.

 

Jungkook bites the inside of his cheek hard, “Uh yeah sure, it's um just a lot.”

 

To be perfectly honest Jungkook hasn’t thought once about his parents since he’s started living with Jin. He hasn’t given himself anytime to think about it, and just focuses on the older boys in his life. Focuses on keeping them happy,

 

_But not himself._

 

Taehyung gives him a pitiful look, “Don't worry Kookie it'll be okay. No one is going to hurt you again.”

 

Jungkook smiles back but in the back of his head he whispers, _except for myself._

 

Jungkook decides to next try and convince Taehyung. They decide to go see an action movie, and for a moment Jungkook completely forgets his jealousy and hurt. Taehyung is laughing and whispering to him in the movie. Tae makes him laugh, and annoys everyone else in the theatre. He's able to feel that warmth in his heart, but it doesn't last.

 

When they leave Jungkook asks to go get ice cream. Taehyung would never pass up the frozen desert, so the two go and sit down.

 

“Hey Tae, can I talk to you about something?”

 

Taehyung looks up from his ice cream, “What is it Kookie?”

 

Jungkook smiles, “You like Jimin don't you?”

 

Taehyung burns red, “Uh- Of course I do! Jimin's one of my best friends.”

 

Jungkook laughs, “You know what I mean hyung, your in love with him.”

 

Taehyung looks away his face even redder, “How long have you known?”

 

“Honestly?” Jungkook says, “Since the whole thing with my parents.”

 

Taehyung looks at him surprised, “That long? Am I that obvious? Do you think Jimin knows?”

 

Jungkook laughs, “He asked me the same thing.”

 

“What?” Taehyung asks.

 

Jungkook smiles, “Tae, Jimin likes you too.”

 

Taehyung blinks, “No, there's no way… Are you sure?”

 

“Who are you talking to again hyung?” Jungkook asks.

 

Taehyung smacks him lightly, “Oh shut up, so you think I should ask him out?”

 

Jungkook nods, but his insides are screaming, “You'd be good together hyung.”

 

Taehyung pauses there. He looks at Jungkook for a long time. He sees how Tae swallows thickly, and how he bites his lip.

 

“Tae? Are you okay?” Jungkook asks.

 

Taehyung nods, “Yeah, no I’m good. Just, Jungkook are you positive I should ask him out?”

 

Jungkook cocks his head to the side, “You like him don’t you?”

 

“Of course I do, it’s just that- I thought that you- I mean,” he mumbles, “I’m just not used to liking someone this much.”

 

Jungkook holds back a grimace, “Than yeah, I think you should. If you like him hyung, I say go for it. Lord knows Jimin wants it too.”

 

Taehyung smiles. It’s not a normal smile, and Jungkook wonders if he said something wrong. Taehyung closes his eyes, and then they flash up with a grin. Jungkook can tell it’s a tad forced, but some of it is true too.

 

“Thanks Kookie, you’re always looking out for us,” Taehyung replies.

 

Jungkook smiles, “Of course, you’re my family.”

 

Taehyung giggles and wraps Jungkook in a tight hug. Jungkook smiles and returns it. The warmth spreads, and Jungkook finds himself relaxing into it. He tightens his arms around Tae, and takes in a shuddering breath.

 

This is it.

 

_It’s over._

 

It doesn’t happen immediately though, in fact it takes quite a while for Taehyung to make a move. He's extremely nervous still despite Jungkook's reassurances. During this Jungkook can tell there's another reason he's not asking him out yet, but whatever it is Jungkook can't figure it out.

 

Finally fed up with all the dancing, Jungkook decides to take this into his own hands. If he's going to get over them then he needs to be prepared. He needs them to hurry up even if it kills him.

 

Jungkook invites the two out one day. He tells them he wants to get food and talk about something, and of course his friends say yes. When they show up Jungkook feels like he's going to throw up. He doesn't want to be here. If things go as planned he's going to have to see them. See how much they love each other.

 

_And not him._

 

“Hyungs! Over here!” Jungkook shouts.

 

The other two boys come to Jungkook smiling.

 

“Kookie!! It's nice to see you, we missed you so much!” Jimin exclaims.

 

Jungkook smiles, “We saw each other last week, hyung.”

 

Jimin hugs him tightly, “Doesn't mean I can't miss you.”

 

Jungkook wants to cry, god he can't do this. Jungkook takes a deep breath and smiles.

 

“So what did you wanna talk about?” Taehyung asks.

 

Jungkook grins, “I'll tell you guys later, for now it's food time.”

 

Taehyung exclaims, “Yes!! Food time sound good.”

 

Jungkook laughs, and the three order food. He finds himself having a good time despite everything going on. He can't stop laughing at Taehyung's random jokes, he can't stop his smile at Jimin's bright laugh, and he can't stop the feelings he has.

 

“Hey Kookie, how are you holding up with your parents?” Jimin asks.

 

The youngest glances up, “Uh, I mean it’s just- I don't know it’s just something I’ve got to deal with.”

 

Taehyung glares, “No it’s not something you should have to _deal_ with. If I told you that about my father how you have reacted.”

 

“Not particularly well,” he responds.

 

Taehyung nods, “Exactly, Jungkook, what happened wasn’t okay. You were seriously hurt, and none of us want to see you like that ever again.”

 

“TaeTae’s right, that was really scary Kookie,” Jimin tells him.

 

The boy looks away. He knew how scary that was for them, but Jungkook doesn’t want to focus on those feelings right now. He’s been doing okay, well maybe not okay really, but he’s not about to shatter like they think he is.

 

“We’re just worried,” Tae adds.

 

Jungkook nods, “I know, but I’m honestly okay. You guys have been helping more than you’ll ever know.”

 

Jimin and Taehyung beam at him. The pair grab him tightly again, and Jungkook can’t hold back his laughter. In actuality Jungkook knows nothing will _really_ change between the three. They will always be super touchy and cuddly, but Jungkook knows in his heart he wants more.

 

Jungkook sighs, he knows he feels like shit, but somehow it's getting easier to deal with. He then excuses himself to the restroom for a moment, leaving the pair alone. Jungkook decides it's finally game plan.

 

He grabs his phone and clicks on Jimin's contact.

 

_Me (11:54)_

 

_Okay Tae it's game time, just ask Jimin out you got this, fighting!_

 

_Me (11:54)_

 

_Fosobfjddj oh my god that wasn't for u sorry!!!_

 

He then taps on Taehyung's contact.

 

_Me (11:55)_

 

_Okay Jimin it's time to roll, just ask Tae out I know he’ll say yes, fighting!_

 

_Me (11:56)_

 

_Hjsjakisn wait that wasn't for h!!_

 

Jungkook puts his phone away and then watches as both of them receive the messages. They both look at their phones confusedly, before looking at the other. Jungkook notices Jimin’s burning face, and Taehyung's awkward smile.

 

He sees Taehyung's mouth moving, and Jimin looks away. Suddenly Jimin's head snaps back up, looking at Taehyung with wide eyes. Jungkook watches as Taehyung's entire face lights up, and Jimin is laughing. The pair look at one another wide big smiles, and Taehyung hugs Jimin tightly.

 

He comes back with an equally big smile.

 

Jimin and Taehyung look at him grinning.

 

“You planned this didn't you?” Jimin asks.

 

Jungkook laughs, “You were dancing around one another so much I had to get involved.”

 

Taehyung laughs, “Thank you Kookie, we really appreciate it.”

 

Jimin nods and Jungkook can see how he squeezes Taehyung's hand. Jungkook smiles, albeit a bit sadly, and then sits back down. The trio finish their meal, but Jungkook can see how antsy they are.

 

“If you want some time alone I can leave,” Jungkook tells them.

 

Taehyung burns, “No! It's okay you don't have to.”

 

Jimin nods with him, “Yeah! We're not going to abandon you, just because we're going to be dating now.”

 

Tae gives Jimin his boxy smile, and Jimin in return cards his hand through his hair. Jungkook quirks his lips up, and picks up his phone.

 

“I might as well head back to Jin’s anyway, I do have a project to do,” he tells them.

 

Jimin frowns, “Liar, you don't have anything to do. Seriously Kookie you don't have to leave.”

 

Taehyung grabs his hand, “Jimin's 100% right. We love you Kook-ah, we won't ever stop wanting to hanging out with you.”

 

Jungkook tries to laugh, but it comes out short, “Seriously guys, you should have some alone time. You just got together after all, and I would rather not have my eyes corrupted by all the PDA I know that's coming.”

 

Taehyung gives him a sad look at bites his lip, “Are you sure you’re okay with this Jungkook?”

 

_No no no no no no no no no no no no no_

 

“Absolutely, you guys are happy, and that's all that matters.”

 

Jimin and Taehyung look at him sadly, but Jungkook smiles brightly. He says goodbye to the pair, and heads back to Jin’s.

 

He thinks about his two best friends, the people he’s closest with, the people he’s fallen in love with. He thinks about how happy they are, how big their smiles are, and how their eyes glow. Taehyung's so happy with Jimin, he's no longer in any pain, just overwhelming happiness. Jimin is just as happy, he's no longer worried about what he looks like, he's happy with who he is and who he's with. Jungkook knows they balance each other out well, and he can’t stop thinking about how _good_ they look together.

 

So yeah, Jungkook really can't stop that smile that ends up forming on his face. Maybe he's a little crushed, but his friends are happy.

 

_That's all that will ever matter to him._

 

Next on his list was Yoongi and Hoseok.

 

He figured those two would be harder in the sense that both can be _extremely_ stubborn.

 

So Jungkook decides it’s best to start individually with each of his hyungs and go from there. He still goes to the library that never is going to change, so Jungkook sees Yoongi a lot. There’s one day that Jungkook strikes up a conversation. It’s a bit forced, and Yoongi can tell there’s something wrong with the boy.

 

“Okay, what's going on?”

 

Jungkook looks up, “Nothing, why do you think there's something going on?”

 

“Because you won't stop bouncing your leg, and your trying to force a conversation,” he replies.

 

The youngest smiles sheepishly, “Oh, sorry hyung.”

 

He stops bouncing his foot, and starts to go back to work. Yoongi looks at him incredulously before hitting the table.

 

Jungkook jumps up.

 

“What was that for!”

 

Yoongi rolls his eyes, “You didn't answer my question brat, kind of rude don't you think?”

 

Jungkook pouts, “It was still mean.”

 

The older boy sighs, and then ruffles his hair, “Hyung is sorry, but seriously Kook-ah. What's going on?”

 

Jungkook puts off talking about it mainly because he's not sure how to bring this up to Yoongi. He knows that Yoongi is extremely stubborn, and also that he's going to deny this entire thing.

 

Jungkook bites his lip, “When everything with my parents happened all of you were there to help. You guys stayed with me throughout the entire thing, and I appreciated that.”

 

Yoongi nods, “Yeah of course, we would never not be there for that, you’re family Jungkook-ah.”

 

“I know that, and it's the same for me. The point is with all of you around me, around each other, and around so much, I noticed something,” he tells him.

 

Yoongi's brows furrow, “Noticed what?”

 

Jungkook swallows, “I noticed that Tae and Jimin started looking at each other differently, I noticed Jin and Namjoon start to act like a lovey dovey couple, and I noticed how Hoseok smiles at you and how you've been acting different around him.”

 

“What the hell do you mean by that?” he asks.

 

The other boy sighs, of course Yoongi wasn’t going to make this easy. He's scared to say it out loud, because just like before Jungkook knows he's giving up those pieces of his heart. He's abandoning them, and Jungkook isn't sure how he's going to recover.

 

“You like Hobi-hyung, do you not?”

 

Yoongi sits there and stares at Jungkook for a moment.

 

“Not the like that you’re thinking, Jungkook-ah,” he replies.

 

Jungkook sighs, “Really hyung? I can _see_ you whenever you’re with him! You act so different.”

 

“Hoseok just has that effect on people Jungkook, trust me I don’t like him,” he replies.

 

The youngest rolls his eyes, “Whatever you say.”

 

“Aish, brat. I’m still older than you,” Yoongi responds.

 

Jungkook grins, “Whatever you say, _hyung_.”

 

Jungkook dodges Yoongi pretty well after that.

 

With Yoongi acting like a stubborn mule, Jungkook moves on to Hobi. He’s not entirely sure how Hoseok is going to react, but he’s hoping it’s better than Yoongi. Hoseok is a bit more obvious in general with his feelings towards the second eldest. Hoseok is always smiling towards the others and loves to hug and cuddle them, but this is different.

 

“Kookie!!”

 

Jungkook turns to see Hoseok running towards him with a big smile. Jungkook smiles back, and hugs the older one tightly. Hobi sloppily plops a kiss on his forehead that Jungkook pretends he’s trying to get away from. Hoseok just laughs, and Jungkook feels all of the bad thoughts he’s been having disappear. The elder is like literal sunshine, and can cast away all of the shadows a person has.

 

“Hi hyung, how are you?” Jungkook asks.

 

The elder beams, “Fantastic! Yoongi-hyung and I recorded some music not too long ago, and now I get to spend time with my dongsaeng!”

 

Jungkook smiles, “Oh? And how did Yoongi act around you?”

 

Hoseok gives him a weird look, “What do you mean by that Kook-ah?”

 

Jungkook shrugs, “Well, Yoongi and I talked the other day.. I was just curious.”

 

“What did you talk about?”

 

Jungkook smiles cheekily, “Tell me how he acted first and then I might tell you.”

 

Hobi rolls his eyes, “He acted pretty normal, there was this one time tho… I got kind of close to him and he moved away, I was worried I made him uncomfortable, but he was really red so I assumed he was just embarrassed.”

 

Jungkook sighs, “I wonder why he still won't believe me.”

 

Hoseok tilts his head, “Kook-ah, what are you going on about?”

 

The youngest looks up at Hobi, and just like with Yoongi he hesitates. Hoseok has always made him feel special, and Jungkook is worried he’ll stop. Regardless the younger boy has committed, and there's no going back.

 

“Yoongi-hyung likes you.”

 

Hoseok turns red, like bright cherry red, “W-What?? Jungkook that’s insane!!”

 

Jungkook gives him a look, “How is it insane? Hobi-hyung think about it. Think about the way he looks at you, the way he smiles at you-”

 

“No- Jungkook he doesn't like me, he _can't,_ ” Hoseok replies.

 

“Why not? If your about to pull a Jimin on how you’re not good enough I _swe-_ ”

 

“We both like someone else, Kookie.”

 

Jungkook stops, “What?”

 

Hoseok sighs running a hand down his face, “We like someone else, the same person.”

 

“Hold on, you guys both like one person? Like the same person?”

 

Hobi’s face scrunches up, “Yes, we both agreed not to do anything about it though.”

 

Once again, Jungkook is reeling. How is it he doesn't notice these things, but he sees everything else?

 

“But, hyung, you like Yoongi too! I see it all the time,” Jungkook says.

 

“I know!! Which is why I can't do anything about it, it's not normal to like two people isn't it?” He asks.

 

Jungkook pauses, this was a question he's asked himself multiple times. He's unsure on how to respond, because what if his hyung asks him how many? Or even worse who?

 

“I don't think it's bad Hobi-hyung, so maybe it's not normal… That's not your fault though right? You can't control your heart,” he tells him.

 

Hoseok looks him in the eyes, “What do you think I should do Jungkook-ah? This other person… Well I've liked them for a while.”

 

“Have they shown any interest?”

 

Hobi frowns, “Sometimes? There are times I swear I see him watching me, looking at me like I'm his whole world… but, he does that with other people too.”

 

“So you think that's just how he is?” Jungkook asks.

 

Hoseok nods, “I like him a lot, and so does Yoongi-hyung… It's just neither of us are sure he likes us back.”

 

Jungkook bites his lip, “Hyung, if I'm being honest with you I think you should try dating Yoongi-hyung. I know I don't know this person, but if they don't show any interest it might be a good idea to move on.”

 

Hoseok looks away sadly, “I know that, I've thought about it for months, but he's really special…”

 

Jungkook feels bitter, and he tries to push away the feelings of jealousy.

 

“Think about it hyung, Yoongi-hyung likes you a lot too,” he tells him, “I think you just need to talk about it…”

 

Hoseok nods once, “Okay, I- God I know you’re right, and I'll try…”

 

Jungkook smiles sadly, “It'll be okay hyung, I'll always be here.”

 

Hoseok gives him a big smile, but it seems so sad… Jungkook frowns before grabbing to elder, and hugging him tightly. Hoseok hugs him tightly as well, and Jungkook wonders if Hobi is thinking of the other person he likes.

 

Jungkook hates that whoever this is doesn't appreciate his feelings, but at the end of the day.

 

He's an absolute idiot.

 

It's about a week later, he gets a call from Yoongi.

 

“Hyung? What’s up? You normally hate phone calls.”

 

 _“Trust me Kookie, I still do,”_ the elder replies.

 

“Then what’s up?” Jungkook asks.

 

_“Okay, so you know how you mentioned me, possibly, liking Hoseok?”_

 

Jungkook huffs out a laugh, “Yes, which I am completely right about.”

 

_“Not right now Kook-ah.”_

 

_“It's just that, I think I wanna try dating him… Hoseok and I had a very long talk the other night-”_

 

“About what hyung?” Jungkook asks.

 

_“Aish, don't interrupt me! We talked about the chemistry between us, and what you talked about with Hobi…”_

 

Jungkook smiles, “And? How did that go?”

 

_“I didn't want to admit it at first, but you know Hoseok he’s stubborn.”_

 

“Yeah, just like you hyung.”

 

 _“Yah! Don't act like a brat, my point is I think you two are right. It sucks that this guy I kind of_ _like_ _doesn't like either of us like that.”_

 

“Which is so dumb, because you two are incredible. I can't imagine why he wouldn't like you.”

 

Jungkook listens to Yoongi laughs very loudly, and Jungkook furrows his eyebrows together.

 

“What? What did I say?”

 

_“Nothing Kook-ah, anyways I think I'm ready to move on. I think Hoseok would be a good way of doing that.”_

 

Jungkook frowns, “Yeah, I agree hyung. You two… You two would look good together.”

 

_“I heard some hesitation there, what are you thinking Kook-ah?”_

 

Jungkook hates how Yoongi can tell these things, but what is supposed to say. I'm in love with both of you and I want us all to be together? There's no way he could ever tell him that… so what is he even supposed to do?

 

“No it's just, don't leave me behind okay?”

 

_“We would never Kook-ah, you are so so important to us.”_

 

“Thank you hyung,” Jungkook replies.

 

_“Alright, wish me luck, fighting!”_

 

“Fighting!”

 

Almost the moment Jungkook hangs up,  the younger boy gets another call.

 

_“Kookie!”_

 

“Hobi-hyung?”

 

_“Jungkook! Listen, Yoongi and I talked about what you said, and I think he kind of agreed with it?”_

 

“Oh.. that's good right?”

 

_“Yeah! I really think this is the best option, and we couldn't have to that conclusion without you Kookie.”_

 

_“Yoongi-hyung seemed kind of unsure about it, but neither of us could deny how we feel about each other.”_

 

_“He said he wanted time to think, and I understand that for sure. Honestly though? I think we’d be good together.”_

 

_“Yoongi-hyung helps me a ton with my depression and gives me so much inspiration. I like to think I help him too…”_

 

“You do hyung, I see how much Yoongi-hyung smiles around you. He acts more childlike and I think that's good,” Jungkook replies feeling his heart hurt more and more.

 

_“I'm glad, thinking about him already has my heart fluttering. I've never talked about it until you Kookie.”_

 

_“So thank you! Without you I doubt any of would've actually happened.”_

 

Jungkook bites the inside of his cheek, hard, “Y-You’re welcome hyung, I'll always be here to help.”

 

_“I know you will Kookie, but don't think this means we're gonna stop hanging out!”_

 

Jungkook hates how Hoseok can see into his brain just like Yoongi can.

 

“I know hyung, I’d hate that if it happened,” Jungkook replied.

 

_“Me too! Again thanks Kook-ah, I really appreciate it. Wish me luck! I've got a Yoongi to catch.”_

 

Jungkook doesn't admit until years later that when he hangs up that phone.

 

_He breaks down in to tears._

 

I week later has Yoongi and Hoseok holding hands.

 

2 weeks later has the pair sharing their first kiss.

 

3 weeks later has Jungkook witnessing it for himself.

 

He hates admitting what it did to him. He put up such a strong front with Tae and Jimin, so he wasn't as affected. He didn't prepare at all for Hobi and Yoongi. He hates how upset he is because yes he is happy for them, but he's also so so bitter.

 

A few weeks after that they admit to the group they are dating, and in turn Jimin and Taehyung come out as well. Everyone congratulates the couples, and some act as if they knew as well. Jungkook congratulates them both, even though he's known for quite a while.

 

The couples smile widely at him though, and Jungkook feels a little proud at causing it.

 

He's still hurting, and he's not sure what to do about it.

 

Hoseok still hangs out with him, but he stops being as affectionate. He also sees how Hoseok seems to always be texting Yoongi, or talking about to Jungkook.

 

He sees Yoongi too, but the visits don't happen as often as they did. He also notices how Yoongi has stopped ruffling his hair and giving him quick hugs.

 

Jungkook hates how the relationship changes things despite how they claimed it wouldn't.

 

He knows saying that makes him seem very selfish too, but he's hurting. He wishes he could have them, but it doesn't seem possible anymore.

 

_He doesn't even realize how depressed he’s getting…_

 

Jungkook expects that Jin and Namjoon will be the easiest to get together.

 

He's right,

 

And he's wrong…

 

Jin and Namjoon already act like a married couple. In fact the others have asked multiple times if they're together, and every time they tell them no.

 

Even though Namjoon blushes like a tomato every time it's mentioned.

 

Regardless Jungkook decides to talk to the two about it. These pair are so obvious he's not sure if it'll be too easy or too hard to get them together.

 

“Hyung, you know Namjoon-hyungs likes you right?”

 

Jin looks at Jungkook and smirks, “Oh my goodness! I never knew!! How could I think that when he looks at me like I'm a _god_.”

 

Jungkook frowns, “So you do know.”

 

“Of course I know Kookie, he's not subtle,” the eldest replies.

 

“But then what are you waiting for??”

Jungkook asks clearly surprised.

 

Jin gets a melancholy face, “Well, at first I wanted to wait for this other guy..”

 

“Oh my god are you serious?? You like someone else too??”

 

Jin quirks an eyebrow, “What does that mean?”

 

Jungkook sighs, “Tae, Yoongi-hyung, and Hobi-hyung all liked someone else before they got together. Yoongi-hyung and Hoseok-hyung liked the same person even!!”

 

Jin laughs, “I saw that too, the only person who didn't notice was you Kook-ah.”

 

“But I notice everything…” Jungkook whispers.

 

Jin pats him on the back, “You don't have to, besides they were careful to hide that around you.”

 

Jungkook frowns, “I still don't get it.”

 

The eldest huffs out a laugh, “Maybe one day you will.”

 

“Okay, moving on… you said _at first_ you were waiting for this guy, what is it now?”

 

“Well to be honest, I really like seeing Joonie act so flustered it's adorable!!” Jin replies.

 

Jungkook can't deny that. When Namjoon gets all embarrassed and flustered it's adorable. He can be extremely awkward, but he's adorable when embarrassed. His face always turns red, and the way he smiles makes Jungkook crazy.

 

_How doesn't he see that he acts like that around him too?_

 

“But hyung, he really likes you! Song you wanna be together?” Jungkook asks clearly still confused.

 

Jin laughs, “Sure I do, but I want him to make the first move. He’s going to act like such a dork.”

 

“Are you seriously in love with him, or are you just trying to embarrass him?” Jungkook asks rolling his eyes.

 

Jin turns pink, “Of course I am, but I still want him to make the first move.”

 

Jungkook grumbles, “You two are absolutely hopeless, Namjoon-hyung will never be able to. He’ll die from a stroke before he can.”

 

Jin laughs, “I believe in him, you should too Kook-ah. We all know in our rag tag group Namjoon is the leader.”

 

Jungkook knew he couldn't deny that. Ever since he met him Namjoon always took charge. Yes he acts awkwardly and breaks everything he touches, but he’s strong. The amount of times Namjoon has taken charge proves that alone.

 

“Still, hyung… are you sure about this? I know you like him and you wanna date him, so why wait?” Jungkook asks.

 

Jin smiles, “I think a part of me wonders if the other guy will do something, and the other part of me wants to start dating Namjoonie…”

 

Jungkook pouts, “Just, don't miss your chance because you decided to wait hyung…”

 

Jin looks down at the youngest, “I would never.”

 

Jungkook smiles at the eldest, and then sits down at the table. During their talk Jin made dinner and the pair get ready to eat it. Out of everything that went right after his parents kicked him out, Jin's cooking was the best.

 

It made him feel warm, whole, and so so happy.

 

The pair eat their food and Jungkook notices Jin staring at him curiously.

 

“What is it hyung?”

 

Jin cocks his head to the side, “I realized you never really talk about your parents.”

 

Jungkook suppresses a grimace. He knows the others have been try to get him to talk about what happened. Maybe they think it'll help him, but all Jungkook can think about is how much it's going to break him.

 

He doesn't want to think about it.

 

He doesn't want to talk about it.

 

He doesn't want to do anything with it.

 

In the back of his head, Jungkook knows this way of coping is bad. But he's already hurting himself by destroying parts of his heart. He's scared that talking about his parents and everything they did will obliterate the rest of his heart.

 

“Hyung, do we really need to talk about this right now..?” Jungkook asks.

 

Jin gives him a pitiful look, “Kook-ah, you know we’re just worried. It might help you to talk about it!”

 

Jungkook shakes his head, “I understand hyung but please, I just.. I can't right now.”

 

Jungkook watches the elder bite his lip. He then stands up and holds the maknae tightly. Jungkook relaxes into the hold like he always does.

 

_He is so terrified those hugs will stop._

 

Jungkook lets Jin have his fun for a month, but at one point seeing Namjoon get so overwhelmed by Jin and his… Jin-ness.. It gets a bit too painful to watch.

 

Which is why Jungkook has dragged the leader out for ice cream.

 

Before Namjoon even has a chance to ask what they are doing here Jungkook pops the million dollar question.

 

“You’re in love with Jin-hyung.”

 

Maybe it's more state than question…

 

Still it is pretty entertaining to see Namjoon turn bright red. His eyes turn down, and his ears turn pink. Jungkook can't help but take a mental photo of that moment. Namjoon has always been adorable on his own, but everyone loves to see him embarrassed. It’s as if his cuteness gets doubled 10 times over.

 

“How did you know?” he asks.

 

Jungkook literally burst out laughing, “Hyung, are you serious? You are the most obvious person on this entire planet!”

 

Hey! Don’t be rude,” Namjoon says as he hits him, “am I really that obvious though?”

 

Jungkook chuckles, “Yes hyung, you’re freakishly obvious.”

 

The other boy groans, “Oh nooooo, do you think Jin-hyung knows?”

 

“I think he’s known for a while,” the youngest tells him.

 

Namjoon puts his face in his hands, “Ughhhh god this is the worst, I’ve probably made him so uncomfortable and I didn’t even know!”

 

“Quite the opposite, hyung.”  


Namjoon looks up at Jungkook who is smiling softly. Throughout all of this Jungkook has put barriers up. He’s prepared for it, well at least he thinking he is.

 

“Jin-hyung likes you too,” Jungkook tells him.

 

Namjoon’s eyes widen, “W-What? Jungkook you have to be kidding me.”

 

Jungkook shakes his head, “I wouldn’t joke about this one, Jin-hyung really likes you… He’s just, he’s been waiting for you.”

 

Namjoon stares at Jungkook for a long time. Jungkook can see millions of emotions whirling through his head, and Jungkook wishes he could understand what each of them mean.

 

“Do you think I should ask him?”

 

Jungkook smiles, “Yes I do, you’d be good together. You are already the parents of our group anyways.”

 

The elder huffs out a laugh, “I suppose you’re right. How should I do it though?”

 

Jungkook shrugs, “That’s up to you hyung. You could honestly just go over to the apartment and tell him, or you could take him out and ask him.”

 

Namjoon seems to ponder this idea for a bit.

 

“I think I’ll take him out to dinner and ask him… Should I buy flowers?”

 

Jungkook can’t help but laugh, “Like I said hyung, that’s your choice. I doubt Jin-hyung would mind though.”

 

The leader looks down smiling warmly. Jungkook can tell he’s excited, happy, and nervous. There are some more emotions there, some that are hidden much better.

 

Maybe if he paid close enough attention he’d have seen how sad Namjoon was too.

 

A few days later Jungkook gets a plethora of texts from Namjoon. The boy is extremely nervous, and he’s gone all out. Jungkook laughs loudly when he sees Namjoon wearing a suit. He also can’t help but shake his head seeing the box of chocolates _and_ bouquet of beautiful roses.

 

Jungkook frowns for a moment.

 

_Jin’s going to be one lucky guy._

 

The youngest shakes those thoughts away. He’s happy for them, he knows how happy they will be. He wants them to be happy.

 

_But he just can’t stop the way his heart hurts._

 

About two hours later Jungkook receives a text message from the group.

 

_Eomma (13:41)_

 

_Just to let you guys know that I have the cutest and sweetest boyfriend ever~_

 

_Sunshine-hyung (13:42)_

 

_WAIT WHAT??_

 

_RapMon-hyung (13:42)_

 

_JIN-HYUNG!_

 

_Suga-hyung (13:43)_

 

_Oh, did Namjoon finally ask you out?_

 

_Eomma (13:46)_

 

_Yes!! He finally did it, and he was so cute you guys! He shows up in this suit with roses and chocolates! Personally I had no idea what to think, but then Namjoon starts stuttering and turning bright red. He finally got those words out, and I don’t think I’ve ever smiled wider~_

 

_Sunshine-hyung (13:47)_

 

_Ah!!! Namjoonie, you’re so cute!_

 

_Suga-hyung (13:47)_

 

_Jesus christ Namjoon, did you seriously have to go all out like that?_

 

_RapMon-hyung (13:48)_

 

_NFISAIKMO OKAY LISTEN-_

 

_RapMon-hyung (13:49)_

 

_I was first, very nervous despite Kookie’s reassurance. Second I had no idea on how to even try asking someone out, and finally Jin-hyung has known for MONTHS that I’ve liked him!_

 

_Sunshine-hyung (13:51)_

 

 _Yeah Joonie, everyone’s kind of known for months…._ _  
_   


_RapMon-hyung (13:52)_

 

_I’m feeling so attacked right now._

 

_Suga-hyung (13:55)_

 

_Ignoring that, did Kook-ah talk to you?_

 

_RapMon-hyung (13:55)_

 

_About asking Jin-hyung out?_

 

_Suga-hyung (13:56)_

 

_Duh, what else could I be talking about?_

 

_RapMon-hyung (13:57)_

 

_IFISIJI9 MULTIPLE THINGS!_

 

_RapMon-hyung (13:59)_

 

_But to answer your question yes, Jungkook talked to me about it over lunch one day. I was really nervous, but he said I should go for it._

 

_Eomma (14:00)_

 

_Which I am grateful for Kookie~ But I also told you I wanted to see Joonie act all embarrassed!_

 

_Me (14:01)_

 

_Sorry hyung, but watching Namjoon-hyung like that was painful for everyone._

 

_Me (14:02)_

 

_I’m glad that you two are finally together. Will I need to move out to make room for Namjoon-hyung ;)_

 

It’s maybe a minute later Jungkook receives a phone call.

 

_“You know I would never right?”_

 

Jungkook pauses clearly confused, “Hyung? What are you talking about?”

 

_“I would never kick you out Kook-ah.”_

 

“Oh that, I was just joking hyung. I didn’t mean anything by it…”

 

_“Jungkook if there’s one thing I know about you it’s that you will downplay your troubles to make things easier for others.”_

 

_“You’re family, I won’t ever kick you out. Remember that.”_

 

“Yes, hyung. I should go, and you should hang out with Namjoon-hyung. Congratulations…”

 

_“Thank you Kookie~ Love you!”_

 

Jungkook hangs up the phone without responding. Hearing the eldest tell him he loves him does wonders on his already fragile heart. Jungkook feels like crying, and he decides to go to his room to do so.

 

He’s happy for them.

 

He’s happy for them.

 

He’s happy for them.

 

He’s-

 

_God no he’s not._

 

Read the end notes please~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was initially going to be WAY longer however it was already blending into the themes I have for next chapter so I decided against it, and decided to combine the end of this chapter with what the next chapter will be about.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jungkook distances himself while finding out new facts about the world,
> 
> the others worry.

_ Jungkook is drowning. _

 

He thought he would be okay,

 

He thought he could do this,

 

He’s so wrong.

 

Over the next few months Jungkook continues to go to college, meet new people, dance, sing, and draw.

 

_He also continues to suffer_

 

When Jungkook got the others together he thought it would be easy to get over them afterwards.

 

Boy was he wrong.

 

Seeing how each boy reacts in a relationship, makes Jungkook crave it just that much more. He sees first hand how sweet Seokjin is, how romantic Namjoon can be, how Taehyung’s lips perk up everytime he sees Jimin, how Jimin’s eyes follow Taehyung everywhere, how Hobi kisses Yoongi right on the cheek, and how Yoongi will return those kisses softly and chastely.

 

Jungkook sees this happening all around him, and he’s suffocating. It isn’t as easy as you’d think trying to get over your six best friends after you got them together.

 

He hates how they’ve started to pull aways from him too.

 

Jungkook understood the couples needing their alone time, but he rarely gets to see them anymore. He just wants his dumb movie nights with Tae and Jimin back. He wants to be able to get some alone time with Jin, he wants to study and talk with Namjoon, he wants to sing and dance with Hoseok, and he wants to eat lamb skewers with Yoongi.

 

He misses them so much, but he could never ask them to just stop hanging out with the other.

 

Jungkook understands that they still see each other, the 7 boys alway make sure to hang out once a week. Every time however Jungkook is just reminded more and more about the three couples he’s brought together.

 

Jungkook tries to bear with it, and honestly he’s done a good job.

 

He manages to smile and laugh with the others, and a lot of that it real.

 

But more of it is just a lie…

 

Jungkook hates how jealous he’s getting, can’t believe how hurt he is when he’s the one whose caused this. The others have nothing to be sorry for, he’s just an idiot.

 

Jungkook comes home from work with Jin one day. The pair are exhausted, and Jungkook really just wants to watch a movie. The eldest promised Jungkook they could eat some junk food and watch a movie later, so the youngest is excited.

 

“Jin-hyung!”

 

Jungkook looks up to see Namjoon standing at the top of the stairs leading to Jin’s. Jin lights up like a christmas tree, and then proceeds to sprint towards the leader. Jungkook feels his heart seize, and he looks away. He hears the pair share a kiss, and Jungkook tries desperately hard to ignore the throbbing in his heart.

 

“You ready for movie night?” Jin asks.

 

Namjoon smiles, “Yeah! I’m excited to spend time with you.”

 

Jin squeals and pinches his cheeks, “Ah! Stop being so cute Joonie!!”

 

Jungkook pauses, “Uh, I thought it was going to be just us watching a movie hyung?”

 

The pair look over at Jungkook as if they just remembered he was there. Jungkook frowns in disappointment and hurt.

 

“Oh, sorry Kook-ah… I thought I mentioned it,” Jin tells him.

 

“I can leave if you want to have some alone time,” Namjoon says.

 

Jungkook wants to say yes, but he knows they really want to spend time with one another.

 

Jungkook has always been a people pleaser, and it only gets worse and worse.

 

“No it’s fine, I was just surprised.”

 

The elders smile warmly and open the door. The three of them go to the living room, but all Jungkook can focus on is how the two are attached to the hip. The movie might be really good, but Jungkook has no idea. All he can focus on is the other two on the couch hugging and smiling and kissing. Jungkook feels a burns sensation spread throughout his entire body, and he feels ready to throw up.

 

Jungkook tries to focus on the movie, but his brain just won’t shut off. Everything around him reminds the boy of the pair in the room. They aren’t quiet after all. The youngest bites his lip praying the pain will drown out the pain in his heart.

 

“Jungkook-ah?”

 

The youngest looks up at Jin curiously.

 

“Have you been doing okay?” he asks.

 

Jungkook’s eyes widen, “Uh, yeah… Why do you ask hyung?”

 

“You’ve just been acting a little off Kookie,” Namjoon replies.

 

Jungkook furrows his eyebrows in slight worry. He hopes the others don’t pick up on this, but he can’t stop thinking about how he’s been acting. Sure he’s probably really distant and stressed from… everything, but he thought he was doing well!

 

“No hyung, I’m okay I promise! There’s just been a lot of changes, and school is almost out. I promise there isn’t anything going on,” Jungkook says smiling.

 

_God he’s such a liar._

 

“Okay Kook-ah…” Namjoon replies.

 

“Man, I'm tired wanna head to bed Joonie?”

 

Jungkook looks up at the eldest, “I thought it was movie night?”

 

Jin looks down and frowns, “Sorry Kookie, were really tired. We can stay up late for movies another night.”

 

The youngest knows that these actions shouldn't hurt them as much as they do. Namjoon and Jin are clearly tired, but Jungkook just wanted to spend time with Jin. Jungkook sees how they are slowly pulling more and more away. Jin doesn't hug him like he used to, doesn't call him baby anymore, he doesn't kiss him anymore either.

 

Jungkook hates how selfish he’s being, he knows that what he's doing isn't healthy.

 

He just has to get over them.

 

“Jungkook.”

 

The boy looks up at the leader. He's staring at him strangely, and there's this authority there. An authority Jungkook isn't used to being on the other end of.

 

“What's going on?”

 

Jungkook freezes.

 

“What do you mean?” He asks.

 

Namjoon furrows his eyebrows, “You keep getting this look on your face everytime I come over. Does us dating bother you?”

 

Jungkook holds back a scream, “No! Hyung, I'm happy for you. Besides I was the one who got you together, so why would it bother me?”

 

“If not that, what is bothering you Kookie? You keep saying you’re fine, but you’re clearly not!” Jin exclaims.

 

Jungkook looks between the two for a bit. He's not sure on what to say. He's been lying for so long now, but what would they do if they found the truth.

 

“It's nothing hyung, I don't really have many issues to deal with now,” he replies.

 

“Jungkook-”

 

“Sorry Jin-hyung. I am feeling rather tired. I'm going to go to bed.”

 

“Jungkook!”

 

The youngest closes the door behind him, and locks it in the process. He hears the elders knocking, but he drowns out the noise. As Jungkook sinks to the floor, his eyes leak tears that travel down his face.

 

_I need to get out of here._

 

Jungkook knew it would be impossibly hard to keep living with Jin, so he decides to spend his time looking for a roommate. He found an apartment not too far, and good price wise if split between two people. He puts listings up, and prays for the best.

 

He gets something alright.

 

“Jungkook!!”

 

Said boy turns to see Yugyeom sprinting towards him. The boy skids to a stop and grins wildly. Jungkook smiles back and the pair share a quick hug. When everything with the others was going to shit, Jungkook started talking to people more.

 

Yugyeom was a big help.

 

He introduced Jungkook to his own rag tag group, and Jungkook couldn't help but laugh with them. They reminded Jungkook of his friends a lot, but it wasn't painful. He wasn't too surprised either to find out many of them already knew some of his members.

 

“What are you up to?” The tall boy asks.

 

Jungkook smiles, “I decided to look for a roommate.”

 

“Why?”

 

Jungkook looks up to see Yugyeom staring at him curiously. Despite how silly the boy can be he can also be very intuitive.

 

“Jin-hyung and Namjoon-hyung have over taken the apartment with their lovey dovey act,” Jungkook tells him.

 

“Ahhh I see,” Yugyeom replies, “well when you wanna tell the truth I’m here to listen.”

 

Jungkook stops and grimaces to himself.

 

Times like these Jungkook wonders if Yugyeom is actually a mind reader.

 

“Oh and I’ll do it,” Yugyeom says.

 

Jungkook looks at him strangely, “You’ll do what?”

 

The other boy grins, “I’ll be your roommate, however you must know I will be bothering you every second of every day.”

 

“Wait really?! You’ll do it?” Jungkook asks.

 

“You act surprised that I would, is it that hard to believe we’re friends Jungkook?” Yugyeom replies with an exaggerated pout.

 

Jungkook rolls his eyes laughing, “Oh shut up, but seriously thank you. I was worried I’d have to go through the awkward first meeting.”

 

“God you’re such a hermit.”

 

Yugyeom receives a punch in response.

 

With the roommate situation figured out, Jungkook talks to the ladies at the front desk. They are very sweet, and Jungkook gets all the details. Yugyeom and himself meet up several times after that, trying to figure out how adulting works.

 

Just like in math, they kind of suck at it.

 

It is refreshing however, Jungkook can act like a kid again, he can pretend he’s not hung up over his six best friends. Jungkook can laugh like he used to, and just… forget. He doesn’t want to think about his feelings, so he decides not to.

 

That probably isn’t healthy.

 

When it comes to telling Jin he’s leaving, Jungkook knows he’s going to freak. Jungkook grabs all of his things before hand, and then sits Jin down one evening.

 

“Hyung, I have something to tell you.”

 

Jin looks up hearing Jungkook’s serious tone, “Is everything okay Kookie?”

 

Jungkook looks up at him with a smile, “Yes actually, but I needed to talk to you about something.”

 

“I’m all ears Jungkook-ah,” Jin replies.

 

“So, Yugyeom was looking for a roommate, and you know I have been too-”

 

“Which you _really_ don’t need to be,” Jin interrupts.

 

Jungkook huffs out a laugh, “Anyways, he asked me if I wanted to, and I said yes.”

 

Jin’s eyebrows turn down, “Are you unhappy here Kook-ah?”

 

Jungkook feels his throat close up. It’s not that he’s unhappy-

 

Well,

 

He is but-

 

That doesn’t matter.

 

“No hyung! I told you way before that I wanted to become completely independent, figure these things by myself,” he tells the eldest.

 

Jin still looks upset, “You don’t need to though! Jungkook I’m here to help you. I love you so much I don’t understand why you won’t accept my help!”

 

Jungkook’s face contorts into a grimace, “Hyung, I’m sorry. Even with you saying that… I just can’t stop those feelings…”

 

“Besides, we already made the payment.”

 

Jin scoffs and shakes his head, “Okay, okay… Do you need help moving your things.”

 

Jin’s tone grows snappy, irritated, and Jungkook hates himself even more for being the cause behind it. He shakes his head and looks down at the floor ashamed.

 

“I’m sorry hyung.”

 

Jin simply shakes his head and gets up. He goes off into his own room, and Jungkook curls up onto his knees. He hates how he’s causing the others pain, hates how much they’re causing him pain.

 

But he hates himself the most for being both reasons these things are happening.

 

Jungkook doesn’t bother Jin after that. He decides to give the elder space until he calls for the youngest. Jungkook and Yugyeom start moving things around making their apartment a bit more homey, and Jungkook is thankful for the distraction.

 

It’s around the final day of moving out that Jin comes to him.

 

Jin looks like a mess, his eyes are red, there are bags, and stress lines all over his face. Jungkook feels his heart twist in guilt.

 

“Hyung I-”

The boy is interrupted by the eldest pulling him into a tight hug. Jungkook tenses in surprise before calming himself down and relaxing. Jin runs a hand down his back and through his hair. It’s just like the old hugs they used to share, and Jungkook feels like crying.

 

Hell he probably already is.

 

Jungkook leans back wiping at his eyes, “Hyung, I’m sorry for making this so sudden but I just-”

 

“It’s okay Kookie, I don’t understand _yet_ , but I will one day right?” Jin asks.

 

Jungkook knows it’s Jin’s way of telling him, ‘I’ll let this go for now, but I need answers’.

 

The youngest smiles, “Of course hyung. One day… I’ll explain everything to you.”

 

Jin smiles, and kisses Jungkook's forehead just like he used to. The youngest grabs onto Jin's shirt. He leans into the warm feeling that spreads from the eldest. Jungkook feels his lungs get tight, and he feels like screaming.

 

_ He’s drowning. _

 

College comes to a close and finals draw near once more. This time around Namjoon isn’t as stressed out, and Jungkook _really_ needs help with his math final. He forces himself to pay attention to what Namjoon is saying.

 

Not his hair, not his eyes, not his face, not his nose, and definitely not his lips-

 

 _Fuck_ he’s doing it again.

 

Jungkook shakes himself out of his thoughts and goes back to paying close attention to what Namjoon is teaching. Some of it still sounds like gibberish, but Namjoon is a good teacher. Jungkook couldn’t be more thankful.

 

Jungkook gets through the rest of his problems with faint ease. He’s still terrible, but he’s able to get through it all. Once they finish Jungkook lets out a very audible sigh, and Namjoon chuckles at it. Jungkook cracks an eye open at the leader, and smiles softly.

 

The pair lock eyes, and Jungkook feels his face heat up. There’s something about the way Namjoon stares at him that gets Jungkook going. He gets overheated, overly excited, and way too distracted.

 

Regardless Jungkook loves looking at Namjoon like this.

 

The elder smiles softly and touches Jungkook’s face. The youngest blushes brightly, and looks away. Almost instantly it’s as if Namjoon realizes what he did, and retracts his hand quickly. He is also blushing bright red, and Jungkook can’t contain his giggles.

 

“Ah, sorry Kookie, didn’t mean to get so… intimate there,” he tells him.

 

Jungkook smiles warmly, “It’s alright hyung… I didn’t mind it.”

 

_I wish you would do more of it._

 

Jungkook shakes his head as if he’s trying to get the thoughts out as well. Namjoon looks at him curiously and Jungkook is caught like a fly in his gaze once more.

 

“What’s been going on with you?” Namjoon asks abruptly.

 

Jungkook blinks in surprise, “Um, what do you mean hyung?”

 

Namjoon sighs, “You know exactly what I mean Kook-ah. You’ve been acting… off lately.”

 

“How so?” Jungkook asks.

 

The elder frowns, “You’re only asking me that in hopes you can correct those mistakes later.”

 

Jungkook looks away guiltily because yep, Namjoon was right. Jungkook slides his gaze back towards the other boy awkwardly.

 

“So? Do you have an answer this time?” Namjoon asks.

 

“Or are you gonna run like last time?”

 

Okay,

 

_Ouch._

 

Jungkook winces feeling that one just stab in him the stomach. He looks up at the elder and tries to figure out what to say, try to help him understand without saying anything.

 

But that just isn’t possible.

 

“Hyung, I’m fine-”

 

“Stop lying Jungkook,” Namjoon orders.

 

Jungkook hates being on the other side of Namjoon when he’s like this. Namjoon is always so prepared to take any new information, and try to process it in his brain. Jungkook normally loves seeing him act like this, but with this specifically Jungkook hates it.

 

“Hyung, please…” Jungkook whispers.

 

Namjoon’s eyes soften, “Kook-ah I just want to help, we all do.”

 

Jungkook runs a hand through his hair taking deep breaths, “I know. I know. It’s just… I don’t even know how to explain it Namjoon-hyung.”

 

“It just feels like my balance of the world is tilted. Like, nothing is going my way, and it… it sucks hyung, maybe that's selfish of me to say but I just-

 

“It’s not selfish Kook-ah,” Namjoon says.

 

The elder ruffles his hair, “It’s okay to want something better for yourself. You’re dealing with some really tough stuff, but your powering through it. It'll be okay Jungkook-ah.”

 

Jungkook looks away pathetically, “What if it's never okay?”

 

“Jungkook-”

 

“It doesn't seem like it's going to get better hyung, I can't stop thinking and feeling and I wish I could just shut off my brain for _one_ goddamn second,” Jungkook whimpers.

 

Namjoon looks at him with wide eyes, “Jungkook- What is going on?”

 

The youngest smiles bitterly, “I'm in love hyung, and they won't ever love me back.”

 

Namjoon sucks in a breath, “In love? With who?”

 

Jungkook laughs bitterly, “I don't wanna say their name, I know you and the others will want to have a long talk with them.”

 

“But Jungkook-”

 

“Please hyung,” he whispers, “I don't wanna talk about this any longer… you know now, are you happy with the answer?”

 

Namjoon looks away guiltily, and Jungkook feels bad for acting like this. It isn't Namjoon’s fault, not really, but once again Jungkook is selfish. He's hurt.

 

And he can't be upset when he's the cause of it.

 

Despite Jungkook acting like a brat, Namjoon pulls him into a hug. It's warm and soft, and Jungkook feels his eyes water. Everything seems to be crashing down on him.

 

_ He’s drowning. _

 

Jungkook finishes his finals after that, and summer break starts. He keeps himself extremely busy, working on paintings, dancing outside of the club, and writing music of his own.

 

To put it shortly.

 

He's avoiding the others.

 

He's not sure if they notice as well, he hasn't heard any of them talking about it. Maybe that's because they're too wrapped up in one another, Jungkook isn't sure. He's not sure if he really wants to know.

 

He still stops by the library, he's curious if Yoongi will show up. He does for the first few weeks, and Jungkook will join him for the most part. Soon enough however he to stops showing up, and Jungkook isn't sure how to feel about. Some part of him is glad that he doesn't have to deal with his feelings of unrequited love. On the other hand he is forced to deal with his feelings of rejection and pain.

 

He's pretty pathetic huh?

 

Jungkook’s good at ignoring his feelings though, stupidly good.

 

“Kookie!”

 

Jungkook spins around to see Hoseok sprinting towards him. Jungkook smiles softly, and waves.

 

“Jungkook-ah! I was surprised to see you, I thought you said you'd be busy?” Hoseok asks looking confused.

 

Jungkook holds back a grimace. He forgot the others were meeting up today, and he said he was going to be too busy. It's not a total lie, he does have to work on a project, do some editing, and you know-

 

_Avoid his friends._

 

“Oh, I'm on my way home actually, I've got to finish a commission,” he replies.

 

Hobi frowns, “Is it really necessary you finish it today?”

 

Jungkook looks away, “Well it’s for someone's anniversary, and I wanted to go ahead and get it done.”

 

That, Jungkook isn't lying about, he does need to finish it. It's just he only has finishing touches to do…

 

Hobi gives him a look, “Jungkook, I can tell when you’re lying.”

 

“I'm not lying, I do need to finish it!” He replies.

 

“But that doesn't mean you’re telling the whole truth,” the elder responds.

 

Jungkook bites his lip, “I just have things I need to do. I'm sorry hyung, but I can't right now.”

 

Hoseok looks at Jungkook for a few minutes. Jungkook looks away, unable to look at the elder out of guilt. Hoseok pulls out his phone, and types something out.

 

Jungkook feels a buzz in his pocket. He stares at Hobi suspiciously and then pulls it out.

 

_Sunshine-hyung (14:26)_

 

_Hey guys! I'm so sorry but something came up, I can't come.._

 

_Suga-hyung (14:28)_

 

_Is everything okay Hobi?_

 

_Sunshine-hyung (14:29)_

 

_Everything's fine babe, I have to help a friend._

 

Jungkook looks up at Hoseok who is smiling at him softly.

 

“Let's go for a walk okay Kookie?”

 

Jungkook looks at the elder and sighs.

 

“Okay hyung.”

 

The pair walk to a park nearby, and Hoseok takes him to a tree. He sits the youngest down, and pulls him into a hug. The sun shines on the pair, and Jungkook feels warmth not only from the sun in the sky,

 

But also the sun right next to him.

 

“Jungkook, I'm really worried about you,” Hoseok whispers.

 

Jungkook leans against him, “I'm okay hyung, I'm still here aren't I?”

 

Hobi hugs him tightly, “But something's wrong. Can you rely on your hyungs a bit more?”

 

Jungkook huffs out a laugh, and Hoseok gives him a concerned look. The younger of the two sighs and squeezes Hoseok’s hand tightly.

 

“This is something I have to deal with on my own-”

 

“Bullshit.”

 

Jungkook scoffs and looks away, “Hyung I really don't want to be rude, but I mean it. I don't want you getting involved.”

 

Hoseok furrows his eyebrows and frowns, “Jungkook I can tell that whatever is going on is seriously messing with your mental health. I'm worried. We're worried.”

 

“I'm okay, I promise I'm okay-”

 

“Jungkook you’re lying! You're not ok-”

 

“What do you know?!”

 

Hoseok leans back in surprise. Jungkook normally doesn't snap at the others, and the fact that he did is shocking. Jungkook breathes heavily and feels his chest get unbearably tight.

 

“Hyung, I’m sorry. I can’t talk about it right now I just-”

 

“It’s okay Kook-ah,” Hoseok whispers, “I should know better than to push you into a corner.”

 

Jungkook takes in a shuddering breath, “It’s not like I want to be distant from everyone it’s just that it’s hard being around everyone when I’m like this.”

 

“Depression does that to a person.”

 

Jungkook’s head snaps up.

 

Depressed?

 

He’s not depressed,

 

Is he?

 

Jungkook looks down with a confused expression, “Is that what this is hyung?”

 

He hears Hobi take in a sharp breath, “You didn’t know?”

 

Jungkook laughs, “No, No I didn’t. I didn’t think that I could be- That I was- am- I mean-”

 

“Jungkook breath, it’s okay to have depression, I mean look at me,” Hoseok tells him with a smile.

 

Jungkook does look at the elder, and he feels all of his emotions leak out for a small moment. He’s so upset, he’s hurting so bad, and no one knows.

 

He’s all alone in this world, and no one is going to be there to witness him crash and burn. Jungkook curls in on himself feelings one of his six walls crack. He tries to cover it up, tries to slam his hands over the crack, but the water is burning. He feels his body burn sickeningly, and he hiccups pathetically.

 

“Oh, Kook-ah.”

 

Jungkook is taken into the other man’s arms, and he is no longer able to hold the wall. In fact all six of his walls collapse, and he can’t stop the sobbing that comes forth. Hoseok somehow always gets Jungkook to confront those feelings. Jungkook isn’t sure whether he should hate it, or be thankful for it.

 

Regardless it hurts.

 

Once the tears subside, Hoseok pulls him against his chest. They lay there for a bit, letting the sun continue to shine on them . Jungkook feels himself grow sleepy, and Hoseok must see it as well.

 

“Come on Kookie, let's get you home,” Hoseok whispers.

 

Jungkook walks with Hoseok to his apartment, and leans heavily against the elder. Jungkook doesn’t want to let go of that warmth, and he clings onto it with all of his might. When they arrive at his apartment door, Jungkook knows Hoseok has to leave. He’s practically moved in with Yoongi, and there’s no way he’ll want to be away from the other.

 

“Thank you for everything Hobi-hyung,” Jungkook whispers.

 

Hoseok gives him a pitiful look, “You’re welcome Kook-ah, but I want you to know we will always be here for you. Don’t pull away. No matter what the issue is, we will accept you.”

 

Jungkook wants to laugh, wants to cry, and scream all at the same time.

 

Who in their right mind would accept someone like him?

 

“Thank you hyung,” Jungkook answers instead.

 

Hoseok smiles satisfied, and hugs the maknae tightly. Jungkook tries to burrow himself in the elder’s neck. He prays he can hold on to his sunshine just a bit longer, but soon enough it’s ripped away from him. Hoseok smiles one last time before descending the stairs. Jungkook hears his phone ring, and watches the elder answer.

 

“Yoongi-hyung! Hey I’m just leaving Kookie’s apartment, he needed some help. I’ll tell you about it later. I’ll be home soon sweetie.”

 

_“I love you!”_

 

_ He’s still drowning. _

 

Despite his talk with Hoseok, Jungkook still struggles severely in talking with the others, letting them know what’s going on, and making sure they never _really_ find out what’s going on.

 

He continues to keep himself busy, only meeting the others once a week. He never stays long, but it's enough to not cause extreme suspicion.

 

Jungkook becomes extremely thankful for Yugyeom during this time. Yugyeom keeps his brain occupied by his random thoughts, his weird shenanigans, and loud singing. It's easy for the two bits to get along. They're both the youngest in their groups, and they both know what that's like.

 

Jungkook hopes that he can maybe force himself to like Yugyeom.

 

“Ya! Jungkook!”

 

Jungkook recognizes the voice, and he turns around slowly. Yoongi walks towards him hurriedly, and Jungkook fears the expression on the elder’s face. He looks angry, and Jungkook doesn’t like being on the other end of that expression.

 

“Ah, hyung. What’s up?”

 

Yoongi gives him a look, “I’ve been messaging you for hours!”

 

Jungkook blinks and grabs his phone. Sure enough there are many messages from the second eldest. Jungkook looks back at him sheepishly, and Yoongi swipes at his head.

 

“Sorry hyung, what exactly did you need?” Jungkook asks.

 

Yoongi rolls his eyes, “I wanna get lamb skewers, and you’re the only person who will come with me.”

 

Jungkook furrows his eyebrows together, “But you never have a problem going alone…”

 

Yoongi freezes for a moment, like he’s looking for an answer that won’t bring up suspicion. His actions alone however put Jungkook on edge. He must need to talk about something with Jungkook, and with how things have been going lately…

 

It’s probably about him.

 

Jungkook audibly sighs and the elder looks at him curiously. Jungkook looks up and smiles softly.

 

“Let’s go hyung.”

 

Yoongi visibly relaxes, thankful he doesn’t have to come up with an excuse. They walk to the closest restaurant, and Jungkook does his best to just relax for a moment. He waits for the older boy to interrogate him, ask him what’s going on like all the others-

 

“I need help on a date with Hobi.”

 

Jungkook freezes.

 

Oh.

 

_Oh._

 

_Never mind._

 

_This is way worse._

 

Jungkook looks up, “Why on earth do you need my help hyung? It’s not like I’ve ever been in a relationship.”

 

“I know that, but you have a tendency to just know what to do in these situations,” Yoongi replies looking away.

 

Jungkook can see how the man blushes. He knows Yoongi is probably very embarrassed, and still isn’t used to talking about his relationship. Jungkook also realizes that because he’s the one who got them together, of course Yoongi would come to him. Jungkook bites the inside of his cheek, and then grins brightly.

 

“Okay! Well is there a reason you want this one to be special?” Jungkook asks with fake optimism.

 

Yoongi puffs up his cheeks, “Well the other week I kind of realized we’ve never been on like an official date?”

 

Jungkook furrows his eyebrows, “What do you mean? You’ve been on plenty.”

 

“But we’ve never clarified it as a date, I just want to take Hoseok out… I think he deserves that,” Yoongi mumbles.

 

Jungkook is shot in the heart, god why does Yoongi have to be so sweet? Jungkook smiles to himself, of course Yoongi out of everyone would be the sweetest boyfriend ever. Yoongi looks up at Jungkook wondering why the youngest hasn’t responded. They lock eyes, and Jungkook smiles softly.

 

_If he paid more attention he would’ve noticed Yoongi blush._

 

“I agree hyung, besides I’m sure Hobi-hyung would love that,” Jungkook says, “he seems like the sucker for cliche romantic tropes.”

 

Yoongi laughs, “You’re exactly right Kook, he really is… So then, what should I do?”

 

Jungkook leans back and ponders. If he knows Hobi, and jesus christ yes he does, then he knows he would fall for the stupid old romantic gestures. Jungkook giggles to himself thinking of the elder and how he would react. He also can’t help but think of how cute Yoongi would be in that situation too.

 

“So? What should I do?” Yoongi asks again.

 

Jungkook smiles, “Do something creative, something really stupid. I know you might feel uncomfortable but Hobi-hyung will love it. Get him flowers, chocolates, open the door for him, pull his chair out for him. You know like boyfriend stuff.”

 

Yoongi pouts seemingly unsure on how to go about this. Jungkook grabs his hand, and takes a deep breath.

 

“Hobi-hyung, will love it. Tell him you wanna take him somewhere nice, and show up at his house looking like a million bucks,” Jungkook tells him grinning.

 

Yoongi looks at him uncertainty clouding his vision, “You really think so?”

 

Jungkook nods fervently, “Absolutely, he’ll fall in love with you all over again just like m-”

 

Jungkook chokes on his words, and Yoongi gives him a strange look.

 

“Like who?” Yoongi asks.

 

This time it’s Jungkook’s turn to freak out. He has no idea on what to say, how could he be so careless? Jungkook tries to wrack his brain for a way out of this situation, and he slowly panics more and more.

 

“Just like my friend has with his boyfriend,” Jungkook spits out quickly.

 

Yoongi gives him a look, that clearly states how he knows Jungkook is lying. The youngest chooses to ignore this however, and instead focuses on the restaurant.

 

“You really have been acting weird.”

 

Jungkook whips his head back at Yoongi who is watching him fiercely. The elder has his eyes narrowed like a tiger would when viewing it’s prey. Jungkook leans back, and looks away quickly.

 

“Hoseok said he talked to you. I just hope whatever it was about isn’t still plaguing you,” Yoongi tells him.

 

Jungkook holds back a laugh.

 

If only he knew.

 

Jungkook shakes his head, “Some of it still is, but it’s getting better.”

 

He gives Yoongi his signature bunny smile, the one that will get anyone off his back. Yoongi seems to relax upon seeing it, and Jungkook mentally pumps a fist in the air. When the pair say goodnight Jungkook is painfully reminded once more about how Yoongi is going through all this trouble for Hoseok, not him. He hates how envious he is. Hates how angry, and sad, and hurt he is. He wants them to be happy doesn't he? That's what spurred this whole thing on...

 

_ He's drowning  _

 

 

By the end of the summer Jungkook is officially sure he’s dying. Everyday seems to be getting worse, and the others keep pulling away more and more. It seems like they’re doing it way more often too. Do they really not want him around? Jungkook is terrified because he doesn’t know what he did. What did he do to receive this treatment? Do they know? Do they know how disgusting he is? How gross and broken and hurt and-

 

_SLAM!_

 

Jungkook is startled from his thoughts by the front door slamming closed. Jungkook watches at Yugyeom storms in his face red and blotchy. His eyes flow with tears, and he grabs a pillow and screams. When Yugyeom looks up at Jungkook his eyes widen.

 

“Why are _you_ crying?” Yugyeom asks.

 

Jungkook blinks, “What?”

 

It’s then that Jungkook realizes his cheeks are wet. He’s not sure when he started crying, but he is. He looks back at Yugyeom who is slumped against the couch. The pair sit in silence, and let their tears flow down their faces.

 

“What happened to you?” Jungkook asks.

 

Yugyeom laughs wetly, “God, everything, and nothing.”

 

Jungkook’s brows furrow, “Yugyeom what are you-”

 

“Have you ever been in love with multiple people?”

 

Jungkook freezes upon hearing the question. His mind races a million miles a minute, and he isn’t sure on how to respond. He can tell Yugyeom is starting to regret asking so Jungkook takes a leap of faith.

 

“Yes,” he whispers, “yes, I- Yugyeom I’m not lying when I say this, but yes… I’m in love with too many people.”

 

Yugyeom whines, “I know the feeling, you mean it though?”

 

Jungkook nods, “Sometimes I wish I didn’t.”

 

The two share a look, and there is some unspoken agreement. Jungkook realizes for the first time in his entire life that he’s going to talk about everything. About how he fell in love, how he got them together, how his heart is breaking into a million pieces. Yugyeom smiles bitterly.

 

“I’m in love with all of my members,” Yugyeom whispers.

 

Jungkook sits up surprised, “Wait you mean everyone in your friend group? Like all six of them?’

 

Yugyeom sighs, “Yeah, all six. It’s crazy isn’t it. How selfish can I be to want six different people?”

 

“As selfish as me.”

 

The other boy stares at Jungkook, “What do you mean?”

 

Jungkook smiles to himself, “I’m in love with my members. I have been for years. I fell in love with Taehyung first-”

 

_Jungkook looks up in surprise and confusion, before being met with the most beautiful smile he’s ever seen._

 

“Then Tae, he brought Jimin and-”

 

_He’s breathtaking_

 

“The others showed up after and I just-”

 

_Seeing Jin happy makes Jungkook’s world-_

 

_“It does look like a bunny”-_

 

_Hobi’s smile is warmth and sunlight-_

 

_“I’m glad we could meet Kookie”-_

 

Jungkook sobs, he finally feels every single dam he created crumble. Yugyeom takes him into his arms. Jungkook wails, and he can’t stop it. Everything hurts so bad, and Jungkook feels like he’s going to collapse. Yugyeom continues to hold him however, and Jungkook leans back. He needs to get this all out he _has_ to.

 

“But then- The others they, they started looking at each other differently and I-”

 

_Hoseok’s bright smiles being directed at solely Yoongi-_

 

_Yoongi’s eyes follow Hoseok everywhere-_

 

_Followed Jin like a love struck puppy-_

 

_Always touching or hugging the other boy-_

 

_Own private conversation-_

 

 _Boxy smile never went away, but it was_ _only_ _around Jimin-_

 

_Jimin’s hands would always be holding Taehyung-_

 

“God I was so _stupid_ I just want them to be happy so I thought they should be with each other-”

 

“Yugyeom I was such an idiot, I don’t want them to be together, and I hate myself for it-”

 

_No no no no no no no no no no no no no-_

 

_He breaks down in to tears-_

 

_He’s happy for them-_

 

_He’s happy for them-_

 

_He’s happy for them-_

 

_God no he’s not-_

 

“I did this to myself, but I can’t handle it- this is all my fault and I’m still acting like such a _brat-_ ”

 

Yugyeom shushes him and leans back. He cradles Jungkook’s face in his hands.

 

“No you’re not. This is a completely valid reason for you to be acting like this. You may have gotten yourself into this situation, but you have every right to be upset,” Yugyeom tells him.

 

“Everyone experiences heartbreak Jungkook, for us it’s just so much more extreme,” Yugyeom whispers.

 

Jungkook exhales and hiccups once more.

 

“Yugyeom the tears- they won’t _stop-_ ”

 

“And that’s okay,” Yugyeom whispers, “let it out, this is the first time you’ve told anyone this assume?”

 

Jungkook nods, and more tears leak out of his eyes. Yugyeom just continues to hold him, and they rock back and forth. Both boys realize how broken they are, Jungkook knows Yugyeom still needs to talk about himself. About what happened, but Jungkook can’t stop crying. He’s so tired, and he ends up crying himself to sleep.

 

_ He’s drowning _

 

The next day Yugyeom tells the other boy what happened the night before.

 

“When I met the others everyone already had such great chemistry. For the longest time I was in love with BamBam, and I couldn’t get over my feelings. As I got to know the others however I realized my feelings were spreading between all six of them, and suddenly I was stuck with these feelings.”

 

Jungkook nods, “I get that.”

 

Yugyeom pokes him, “I know you do.”

 

“The point is that I fell in love with all of them, but I knew at least four of them were already attracted to each other. I knew that, but I couldn’t stop it. Mark-hyung and Jinyoung-hyung got together first, and not long after Jaebum-hyung and Youngjae-hyung followed. It hurt seeing them together, but they were happy.”

 

“It not like I could just take that away from them,” he whispered.

 

Jungkook nods in understanding, Yugyeom then takes in a shuddering breath.

 

“That meant it was only Bammie, Jackson-hyung, and myself left, but yesterday- God I wish I could have just waited… I went to the bathroom and I saw them- they were- _fuck-_ ”

 

Yugyeom buries his face in his hands, and Jungkook leans over and rubs his back. Jungkook couldn’t imagine just walking in on something like that. He’s not sure how he would’ve reacted, but he knows it wouldn’t be good. Yugyeom leans back and looks down.

 

“I’m pathetic huh?”

 

Jungkook pulls the other boy into a hug, “Well then I guess we’ll be pathetic together.”

 

Yugyeom laughs under his breath, “Thanks Kook. God all of this feeling crap has gotten me so tired, do you wanna watch a movie?”

 

Jungkook frowns, “Are you sure you don’t want to talk about it more? I can tell there’s a lot more there than you’re letting on.”

 

“Maybe another time,” Yugyeom replies faking a smile, “right now I need to see Iron Man go beat up an army of aliens with the Avengers.”

 

Jungkook laughs and nods, “Okay, thank you for everything Yugyeom. I thought I was alone in this world, but looks like we’ll just be idiots together.”

 

Yugyeom grins, “Well you’ll be the only idiot.”

 

Jungkook grabs at him, and the pair start rough housing. It’s not easy to be dealing with heartbreak, but the boys knowing they can go to each other for help comforts them. It eases the cracks in his heart even if they will never truly heal.

 

School starts up again for the two boys, and Jungkook thanks god he has a valid reason to avoid the others. It reminds him of the first time he came here, and how upset he was that he had no classes with them.

 

How time changes things so quickly scares him.

 

Regardless Jungkook starts his classes, math is still difficult and he probably should go talk to Namjoon… Jungkook decides not to and Yugyeom and himself do their best to understand the confusing problems. Jungkook finds his second year is much harder than last year, and he knows it’s because he’s so closed off again.

 

The months go by and the cold weather settles in, and all the while Jungkook avoids and sees the others every week.

 

One day he’s on his way home from class, it’s been a long day and Jungkook is about ready to pass out.

 

“Kookie!!”

 

Jungkook turns to his left to see Jimin smiling brightly. Jungkook smiles weakly back, if his heart was in tact perhaps it would have done more to him. Now all it does is make him force his feelings to the back of his heart. Jimin runs over to him, and hugs the younger boy tightly. Jungkook hugs him back, but pulls away quickly. Jimin gives him a confused look, but Jungkook just continues to smile.

 

“Are you okay Kook?” Jimin asks.

 

Jungkook nods, “Just tired hyung, school has been a tad difficult lately.”

 

Jimin frowns, “You need to take care of yourself Kookie, you’re gonna get yourself sick.”

 

“I’ll be okay hyung,” Jungkook replies.

 

He goes to turn away when Jimin grabs his arm. Jungkook looks at the elder curiously, and Jimin is looking at him with concern and sadness.

 

“When did you start calling me hyung willingly?” Jimin asks trying to smile.

 

Jungkook stares at him for a while. He’s not sure when the nicknames stopped, but he knows _why_ they did. Jungkook simply smiles and shrugs.

 

“Sorry ChimChim,” Jungkook responds.

 

Jimin’s eyes search for something, and Jungkook understand that Jimin realizes something must be wrong. Jungkook can’t have him finding anything out, so he pulls his arm back and says goodbye.

 

“No.”

 

Jimin grabs him once more and drags him towards a bench. Jungkook tries to pull away, he doesn’t want to be having this conversation. He doesn’t want anything to do with it. Jimin doesn’t relent, and Jungkook finds himself stuck in the elder’s hold.

 

“Jimin-hyung-”

 

“Stop with the hyung Kookie!”

 

Jungkook looks up at the elder. He never thought he’d hear him say those words, but Jungkook understands why. Jimin grabs Jungkook’s face and he stares into his eyes. Jungkook pushes every feeling he has for Jimin back, he can’t let them resurface. He’s been doing so well, and if he let’s those feelings come back-

 

Jimin wraps his arms around him, and kisses his forehead softly.

 

Jungkook feels his dam open, and he grimaces. Once again Jungkook is reminded of the fact Jimin doesn’t love him, and of how much he loves him. If the hanahaki disease existed like in the fairytales, Jungkook would surely be dead.

 

“Jungkook, the others kept saying you were acting weird, but when we would be together you acted fine. I thought they were over reacting but-”

 

Jimin looks into his eyes again, “I can tell there is something going on. I’ve known you for years, Kookie. I may not be as observant as you are, but I know _you_. Which means I also know when something is up.”

 

Jungkook wants to laugh at the situation. It seems he gets himself into the same one every time he sees another member of his friend group. Jungkook sighs and takes Jimin’s hands.

 

“Jiminnie-”

 

“ChimChim! Kookie!”

 

Both boys look up to see Taehyung sprinting towards the two. Jungkook tries to force his walls up again, he can’t let Taehyung get past them. He’ll crash again.

 

_He’ll drown._

 

Taehyung tackles the pair to the ground, and Jungkook groans. Taehyung laughs loudly though and leans back. He gives Jungkook that boxy smile, and Jungkook once again feels his heart shatter. The feelings rush back inside like a tsunami of negativity. The youngest not only feels all of his love for Taehyung and Jimin, but he feels the others as well.

 

Some of it isn’t really bad.

 

He remembers every sweet moment he’s ever shared with the six, but Jimin and Tae will always be special to him.

 

Jungkook looks to his side, and sees the other two looking at him intently. He’s taken back to that night he realized he loves them. He remembers how they smiled, and how warm he felt.

 

Jungkook smiles as he feels the warmth once more.

 

Taehyung grins, and then turns to Jimin. Jimin smiles at the other boy, and the kisses him softly.

 

_Jungkook hates how quickly he grows cold._

 

The three sit up, and Taehyung plops right onto Jimin’s lap. Jungkook smiles at the two, and pretends he’s there too. Jungkook looks away sadly, and then stretches.

 

“Jungkook and I were just talking about how he’s been acting lately,” Jimin says.

 

Taehyung looks between the two, “But he’s been okay? I mean he’s been distant but-”

 

“Taehyungie- He’s not okay,” Jimin whispers giving Jungkook a pointed look.

 

“He called me hyung, _voluntarily,_ ” Jimin mutters.

 

Taehyung’s eyes widen and he look at Jungkook, “Why? You never call Jiminnie hyung.”

 

Jungkook huffs out a laugh, “I’ve been doing a lot of things lately hyung.”

 

“Why are you calling me hyung?”

 

Jungkook looks up and sees Taehyung give him a hurtful look. Jungkook grinds his teeth together, and breathes in deeply.

 

“Sorry Tae, there’s been… a lot going on lately,” Jungkook mumbles.

 

Taehyung gives him a concerned look, “Jungkook if you’re in trouble you know you can always come to us.”

 

Jungkook nods, “I know Tae, I just can’t talk about it right now-”

 

“One day I’ll explain but I can’t get into it,” he finishes.

 

The other two boys share a look, and then look at the youngest. They notice the bags under his eyes, notice how shaggy his hair his, how his clothes seem to hang off of him.

 

“Jungkook you’re scaring me,” Jimin whispers.

 

Jungkook looks up and smiles bitterly, “That’s what the others said too.”

 

The pair look at him in horror.

 

“Jungkook this isn’t funny, you’re seriously freaking me out-”

 

“Tae please,” Jungkook interrupts.

 

Jungkook looks at them with a cold stare. The other two have never seen him look at them like this, and it makes them hold onto each other tighter.

 

“I don’t need you getting involved,” he tells them.

 

Jimin’s eyebrows furrow, “Jungkook something is clearly wrong, and you not talking about it isn’t going to help _anyone_.”

 

The youngest looks away, “It’s the only way I know how to deal with it.”

 

Taehyung grabs his shoulders, “That isn’t healthy Kookie, what you’re doing is really bad for you. Is this why you’ve been missing from the group lately?”

 

Jungkook looks away refusing to answer the question. Taehyung and Jimin lean forward and bring him into a hug. He’s stuck between the two, and Jungkook feels like crying. Maybe he does. Only a little bit though. Jimin hums a soft tune, and Taehyung cards a hand through his hair. Jungkook relaxes against the pair, and he thinks back to a time things were easier.

 

It only seems fair now that the others aren’t suffering he has to right?

 

The two boys take Jungkook to Jimin’s and the youngest realizes it’s been a long time since the three of them have hung out. Jungkook expects to be pushed aside, and be forced to watch the two have their moments. He’s surprised by the boys bringing him in the middle. Jimin grabs a blanket, and Taehyung puts a movie in. Jungkook is cuddled on both sides, just like they used to do. Jungkook feels a part of his heart mend for a moment. It won’t last and he knows that, but for now he’ll take it.

 

Jungkook sinks into the couch, and in turn the two boys hold. He lets his mind wander onto the movie, and focuses on the warmth that spreads between them.

 

When was the last time he felt like this?

 

He can’t remember.

 

Jungkook smiles contently, and feels his mind grow foggy. With the boys holding onto him, he manages to slip into sleep easily.

 

He thinks he feels lips brush against his temple, but he’s already too deep to focus on it.

 

When he wakes up, it to hushed voices, and a not so warm couch. Jungkook realizes the two boys must have gotten up at some point, and Jungkook searches for the pair in the house. He’s still groggy, and very tired but Jungkook follows the faint voices.

 

“Jiminnie? TaeTae?”

 

Jungkook opens the door to see the two boys playing a video game. Jungkook smiles to himself and joins them. Taehyung gives him a big smile, and Jungkook returns it happily. He watches Jimin lose over and over again until the eldest boy promptly gives up. They laugh and talk for hours, and Jungkook is able to just, forget for a bit.

 

He’s with his two best friends.

 

The two people he fell in love with.

 

The two boys who won’t ever love him back.

 

Jungkook pushes the thoughts to the back of his brain, and instead focuses on the meaningless conversation they’re sharing.

 

“Hey Kookie?”

 

Said boy look at Jimin, “Hm? What is it Jiminnie?”

 

Jimin smile warmly happy the boy used the nickname, “Will you come to movie night this Saturday?”

 

Jungkook looks at him with uncertainty, “Ah, I don’t know-”

 

“Please Kook-ah?” Taehyung asks.

 

The younger of the two bites his lip, “I’ll think about it okay? It depends if it’s a bad day, but I might… Just leave the door unlocked for me okay?”

 

The two boys nod satisfied with that, and Jungkook smiles. When it comes time for him to leave, the other two beg him to stay.

 

“I can’t, and I mean it this time,” he tells them, “I promised Yugyeom we would have movie night.”

 

The pair frown and Taehyung asks, “You two seem awfully close lately…”

 

Jungkook raises an eyebrow, “Yeah? We are roommates Tae.”

 

“He’s asking if you two are dating,” Jimin tells him promptly.

 

Jungkook chokes on the air, “Me and Yugyeom? Dating? Are you serious?”

 

The pair look at the him confusedly, “Why is that such a shocking thing to ask?”

 

Jungkook laughs, “It’s not, at least not really, but Yugyeom is in love with someone else, and we few each other more of wingman's rather than possible love interests.”

 

The youngest shakes his head, “Regardless, no, we aren’t dating.”

 

Taehyung relaxes at this which confuses Jungkook.

 

“Okay, well then I guess you should head home,” Jimin mutters pouting.

 

Jungkook laughs, “Don’t worry Jiminnie, we can hang out again soon.”

 

Jungkook means that this time, it wasn’t as painful as he thought it was going to be, maybe he is getting used to-

 

“Alright sweetheart, let’s go inside,” Jimin says to Tae sweetly.

 

He kisses him chastely and says goodbye to Jungkook.

 

Oh yeah, that’s right.

 

_ He’s drowning _

 

When Saturday comes around Jungkook can’t stop pacing, he’s incredibly nervous, and he isn’t sure on what to do. Yugyeom watches him for hours until he can’t stand it.

 

“Jesus christ Jungkook, either leave or stay!”

 

“Ah! Yugyeom you know this isn’t easy,” Jungkook hisses.

 

Yugyeom rolls his eyes, “Then stay for god’s sake.”

 

Jungkook frowns, “But Jimin and Tae really seemed to want me there…”

 

“THEN GO!”

 

Yugyeom glares at him annoyed, and Jungkook puffs up his cheeks.

 

“Okay, I’ll go,” he says to himself.

 

Yugyeom stands up then and grabs Jungkook by the shoulder, “It’ll be okay. If you need anything just call me okay?”

 

Jungkook nods, “I know, thanks Yugyeom, I should head out.”

 

He grabs his yellow coat to guard him from the cold wind. With winter arriving sooner than expected everything is freezing. Despite all of this Jungkook knows he is pretty late, so he hurries over quickly. It’s funny that despite how long it’s been since he’s been to Jin’s his body just remembers exactly every movement it takes to get there. He smiles to himself, and does his best to ease the nervous jitters. He walks up to the door, and tests the knob. He’s pleased to see they left it unlocked for him, and he opens it quietly. He doesn’t want to disturb anyone after all.

 

He hears laughter coming from the living room, and Jungkook takes a deep breath to ease his nerves. He walks in quietly, and thinks of scaring the other boys. He hides behind a wall, and then peaks out.

 

_What_

 

_Wait_

 

_What?_

 

Jungkook feels his insides turn to jello. There on the couch aren’t the usual couples. Hoseok is holding onto Jimin, Taehyung is snuggled up into Jin, and Namjoon is resting his head against Yoongi. Jungkook tries to believe that this is just something they’ve started doing. Yeah of course, it doesn’t mean anything its just-

 

_Jungkook watches as Taehyung leans up and kisses Jin right on the lips._

 

Jungkook steps back, and stupidly knocks into a table. The others turn and see him standing there. Taehyung’s eyes widen in horror and he sits up suddenly. The others stare at him like a deer in the headlights, and Jungkook feels like he’s going to vomit.

 

“Jungkook this isn’t what you think it is-”

 

“Tae, he deserves to know,” Jin interrupts.

 

Jin looks between them, he feels something twisting inside of him, “What’s going on?”

 

The others look between each other.

 

“Jungkook, we… We’re dating. All, all six of us,” Namjoon tells him.

 

Jungkook feels the ground collapse underneath him.

 

_Oh,_

 

_Six._

 

Jungkook can’t help the laugh that bubbles up, he’s on the verge of a breakdown. The others stand up visibly concerned for their youngest, and Jungkook steps back laughing louder.

 

“Why is god so cruel?” he whispers out loud.

 

“Kook-ah, what are you talking about?” Yoongi asks.

 

Jungkook buries his face in his hands, “I can’t believe this. You’re dating. All of you? You’re all dating? How? When?”

 

Hoseok clears his throat, “When you started pulling away we talked for a while on what to do, we we’re worried. We started meeting up more and more, and well-”

 

“We started to fall in love with each other,” Jimin finishes.

 

With Jungkook not present he couldn’t have ever seen the signs of this coming, and Jungkook backs away.

 

“Jungkook-”

 

He feels tears stream down his face and he laughs again.

 

“Of course,” he whispers, “of course.”

 

“Jungkook if you’re uncomfortable,” Yoongi starts.

 

“I’m not! No I won’t ever be uncomfortable around my best friends who are apparently all _dating_ now!”

 

Jungkook knows he’s being a brat, he knows that what he’s saying is hurtful, but none of them understand the type of pain he’s in right now. He’s loved them for years, and they never loved him. They chose each other over him.

 

Is he really that dislikable?

 

“Jungkook, we understand if you’re upset, but you don’t have to act like this,” Jin scolds.

 

“Act like what?! Like I’m upset? Like I’m angry? Well sorry to break it to you hyung, I can’t control those feelings,” he spits.

 

“Jungkook! What is _wrong_ with you?!” Jimin exclaims.

 

“Wrong? _Wrong?!”_

 

Jungkook screams into his hands, he starts sobbing, and the others stare in horror. No one has any idea why the youngest of their group is having such a strong reaction, but it’s scaring them. Jungkook wails, and Hoseok tries to step towards him.

 

**“ _DON'T!”_**

 

Jungkook backs away his face red and blotchy, he’s never cried like this in front of the others. Jungkook laughs bitterly. He turns away from them, and his shoulders shake.

 

“Jungkook, what is going on?”

 

Jungkook huffs out a laugh.

 

How many times has he been asked that now?

 

Six? Eight? Fourteen times?

 

He’s never had an answer for them, never been able to answer without fearing how they would react.

 

Jungkook doesn’t care anymore though.

 

He’s practically lost everything already.

 

“Turns out I suck at being in love,” he whispers.

 

The others look at him confusedly.

 

“Kook, what do you mean?” Namjoon asks.

 

Jungkook smiles bitterly, “I met Taehyung in the fall, from there he brought Jimin into my life, and then they brought the rest of you in. I gave each of you a piece of my heart  and you, I let you do what you wanted with it.”

 

“Because of that I grew to love Tae’s boxy smile, Jimin’s small hands, Jin’s cooking, Yoongi’s raps, Hoseok’s dancing, and Namjoon’s tutoring. Each one of you helped me in different ways, and I love it.”

 

_“I love you.”_

 

The other boys look at him with wide eyes.

 

Jungkook’s breath hitches.

 

“I’m in love with you- All of you- I have been for years- And god I- I’m so _sorry_ -”

 

Jungkook takes a step back, and then another. Suddenly he’s sprinting outside of that apartment, and ignores the screams of his name. Even if one of them runs after him, he knows he can outrun them. Jungkook’s always been fast, and as he sprints away he feels the cold hair freeze his tears.

 

He ends up at the river Jin took him to so long ago, it’s freezing outside, but Jungkook couldn’t care less. He sinks to the ground and sobs. He’s such an idiot, how could he ever think things could be okay?

 

Jungkook’s thoughts are interrupted by a phone call. Jungkook expects it to be one of the boys, but he’s surprised to see it’s Yugyeom.

 

“Hello?”

 

_“Jungkook?! Hey, are you okay?! I got a call from Jackson saying Namjoon told him that you ran away?”_

 

Jungkook laughs, “I guess you could say that.”

 

_“Jungkook what’s going on?”_

 

“They, they’re dating Yugyeom, all six of them. They are dating-”

 

_“Oh, Oh my god Kook- I-”_

 

_“Where are you?”_

 

Yugyeom’s voice grows incredibly serious, and Jungkook blinks away his tears confusedly.

 

“The river, why?”

 

He hears Yugyeom’s breath hitch.

 

_“Stay there Jungkook, don’t move, don’t you dare move!”_

 

_Oh,_

 

Jungkook laughs bitterly, he’s never thought about doing anything like that. Something about it seems peaceful though. He looks out at the freezing water, and smiles. It seems to be calling to him, and Jungkook stands up. He walks to the edge of the bank.

 

_“Jungkook!”_

 

_“Hey! Why aren’t you responding??”_

 

Jungkook laughs wetly before it delves into a sob, “Yugyeom, I’m sorry.”

 

_“Wait- No? Jungkook wait!!”_

 

Jungkook throws the phone away, and steps into the water.

 

It’s freezing, but Jungkook has felt colder than this for so long.

 

He goes further out, and starts to feel his teeth chatter. He knows he will most likely die of hypothermia before anything, but Jungkook has other plans. He grabs some heavy rocks, and ties them to his waist. He swims out as far as he can with the heavy rocks, and then lets them fall. They don’t pull him all the way to the bottom, but he’s no longer able to take any more air in.

 

Jungkook looks up at moon from beneath the freezing waters. His chest is getting tight, his head is pounding, and he’s in excruciating pain.

 

_Jungkook’s drowning_

_He’s drowning._

_He’s drowning_

_He’s-_

 

_\---------------------------------------------_

 

#####  **Okay,**

 

**First of all.**

 

**Please don’t kill me.**

 

**Second,**

 

**Jesus christ you guys I decided to just leave my computer alone for a day to just see how many people would end up commenting on the last chapter. I always get really excited to see comments, and it helps me write as well. It just made me really happy! I got freaking nineteen messages in a day, and I about started sobbing. I went to friends and freaked out on them for a little bit,**

 

**Which I know they thoroughly enjoyed.**

 

**But seriously! That was so awesome of you to do that, I know from experience that sometimes you’ll read something and decide not to comment or anything, so I appreciate how you guys took the time out of your day to do so.**

 

**That was honestly the driving force for me to get this chapter out so quickly, I’m sorry for this angst bucket, but it does get better, hopefully, maybe ;)**

 

**I hope to see more of you soon, it might take me a tad longer with this next chapter because my birthday is this upcoming Monday and I am spending the weekend with some friends.**

 

**Regardless, have a good day everyone! See you next update~**

 

**PS: I have a twitter if you'd like to follow it there's nothing there right now, but i post some of my art on there, you can check it out if you want it's Muscle_Bunni just like my user here.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time to see the fate of our beloved bunny,
> 
> and some resolution shit.

Jungkook didn’t expect to wake up.

 

He was prepared to die, and he found it peaceful once the water came in. He shut his eyes and he prays for a better life.

 

But suddenly he’s throwing up water, and hacking up a lung in the process. He’s extremely disoriented, and he’s not sure on what exactly is happening. He hears voices, people screaming, and sirens? Jungkook curls in on himself. Fuck he can’t even die correctly?

 

_“Jungkook!”_

 

_“Jungkook you mother fucker!”_

 

The young boy manages to focus on the person above him.

 

“Yugyeom… What-”

 

“You _fucker!_ ”

 

Yugyeom slaps him across the face, “How could you even think for a second this was a good idea?! You’re an absolute-”

 

“Sir, we need to take him, depending on how long he was in that water he could be in grave risk due to hypothermia,” an emt tells him.

 

Yugyeom nods and turns to Jungkook, “We’re going to talk more at the hospital, especially about how much of an _idiot_ you are.”

 

Jungkook manages a nod, but he feels so weak.

 

“We’ve gotta take him now, he’s too cold.”

 

Jungkook hears more voices, but soon enough they all blend together. He feels everything press down on him, and he passes out from the weight.

 

And then,

 

He wakes up.

 

Jungkook opens his eyes to a white room. He’s standing in the middle of it wearing a set of white pajama pants. He doesn’t know where he is, and he can’t seem to find an exit either.

 

“Oh my baby Jungkook.”

 

Jungkook freezes.

 

“Grandma?”

 

Jungkook turns around to see his grandmother even if she is in a much younger version of herself. She steps forward and wraps him in a tight hug. Jungkook grabs her tightly and sobs. He’s been crying a lot lately, and the tears just keep coming. She pulls away from him before glaring.

 

“Idiot! How could you think trying to die like that would prove anything?!” she yells swatting at him.

 

Jungkook touches his head, “Ow!”

 

His grandmother leans back, “You deserve that, you put your friend through a lot Kook, you need to remember the people around you also care about you.”

 

Jungkook looks away, “I was just in a lot of pain, I know that I should’ve handled it better… I was scared, and hurt, and just- God I don’t even know.”

 

His grandmother grabs his face with her hands. She smiles warmly and kisses his forehead.

 

“Well remember the people around you Kook, you don’t get second chances often,” she tells him.

 

“Second chances?” Jungkook asks.

 

His grandmother laughs, “Where do you think we are?”

 

Jungkook pauses looking around, “I, I don’t know-”

 

“Exactly, we’re in a limbo right now, it's the in between the living realm and the afterlife.” she informs him.

 

“So, I’m not dead?” he mumbles.

 

She shakes her head, “You came close. You went into cold shock, it can really mess with someone Jungkook. You could’ve died.”

 

Jungkook pauses, he isn’t sure on how to react. On one hand he did plan on dying so he should probably be upset he failed right? But on the other hand he knows people would’ve been extremely torn up about it. Jungkook quirks his lips, and looks back at his grandmother. She’s giving him a warm smile, and Jungkook knows what it means.

 

“It’s time for me to go back isn’t it?” he asks.

 

She simply nods her head, and Jungkook hugs her tightly.

 

“It isn’t your time Kookie, one day we’ll see eachother again, but not like this. Live your life to the fullest, and go get those boys,” she says with a wink.

 

He gives her a confused look, “They don’t want me.”

 

She shakes her head, “How is it you’re so intuitive when it comes to others, but not yourself?”

 

He wants to ask her what she means by that, but he’s being pulled away. He reaches a hand out to her, and she smiles brightly. His grandmother waves at him, and Jungkook feels one final tear slip down in cheek.

 

“See you in the future.”

 

Jungkook feels his eyes twitch, and light floods his vision. He hears beeping and whirring sounds, and hears people outside his room. Jungkook turns his head to his right, and sees Yugyeom sleeping in a chair. He smiles softly, and tries to push himself up. It’s difficult, and he’s still so tired. It feels like he has dumbbells all over his body.

 

“I see you’re awake.”

 

Jungkook looks up seeing a woman smiling at him. She’s short, and holds a clipboard in her arms.

 

“How are you feeling?” she asks.

 

Jungkook tries to speak but it comes out as a croak. She winces and then gives him a cup of water.

 

“You’re throat is most likely sore due to when you threw up all that water,” she tells him.

 

Jungkook nods and gulps down the cold drink, “Thank you.”

 

“Mhmmm…”

 

Jungkook turns to see Yugyeom stir from his slumber. The boy rubs at his eyes before looking up at Jungkook. Yugyeom’s eyes widen comically, and he shoots up. He strides forward and Jungkook prepares to be hit, but Yugyeom hugs him tightly.

 

“You _asshole_.”

 

Jungkook laughs, “How many insults do you have for me?”

 

Yugyeom leans back smirking, “I have a long list I’m prepared to use.”

 

Jungkook smiles softly.

 

“Thank you Yugyeom. You saved me, and I just- thank you,” Jungkook whispers.

 

Yugyeom sighs, “It wasn’t all me…”

 

Jungkook furrows his eyebrows together, “What do you mean?”

 

“Jin was the one who got you out of the water, I just did the CPR,” he informs the boy.

 

“Jin-hyung? He got me out? But that would mean-”

 

“The others were there yes,” Yugyeom whispers.

 

Jungkook looks away, “God, I’ve probably made them feel terrible-”

 

“Yeah you did-”

 

Jungkook shuts Yugyeom up with a glare, the other boy rolls his eyes before continuing.

 

“But they deserve a bit of it. Those idiots should’ve just told you instead of hiding it,” he growls.

 

Jungkook shakes his head, “To be fair Yugyeom, I wasn’t all that honest either.”

 

The other boy puffs up his cheeks, “Well I’m still pissed, at them and _especially_ you.”

 

Jungkook looks away, “I’m sorry, I bet that was really scary for you.”

 

The other boy sighs, “Dammit how am I supposed to stay mad at you when you do shit like this?”

 

Yugyeom looks at him, “Buy me lunch for 2 weeks and we’re even.”

 

The forgotten nurse looks horrified, “You can’t possibly ask that of him when he just-”

 

“Deal,” Jungkook says.

 

The nurse looks between the two before muttering something along the lines of ‘boys and their stupid shenanigans’. The young boys watch her leave and look at each other. They laugh loudly, and Jungkook looks up. He knows he has to talk to the others. It’s time to get all of these feelings out, whether they hate him or not Jungkook needs them to know. That can wait though. He isn't ready, he's not sure he ever will be.

 

“Where are they?” Jungkook asks.

 

Yugyeom looks over to him, “They are waiting outside in the you know, waiting room.”

 

Jungkook looks at the fellow maknae, “I don’t want to see them yet.”

 

“Jungkook-”

 

“Please Yugyeom,” he whispers.

 

“I can’t right now.”

 

Yugyeom sighs, and rubs his back, “Just because you can avoid them now, doesn’t mean you’ll be able to in the future.”

 

Jungkook nods to himself, “I know…”

 

Jungkook stays in the hospital for one more day, but honestly he is okay. Yugyeom helps grab his things, and Jungkook holds the yellow jacket that he wore before. He looks at the bright yellow color, and smiles bitterly. He throws it on ignoring Yugyeom’s worried look.

 

Jungkook stays on edge as they leave the hospital, he keeps looking around for a sign of one of the boys.

 

“They aren’t here if that’s what you’re worried about,” Yugyeom tells him.

 

Jungkook looks at him, “Where did they go?”

 

Yugyeom raises an eyebrow, “Home? Where else dingus?”

 

Jungkook smacks his arm, and sighs relieved.

 

Apart of him wants to see the others, hear what they have to say. Jungkook is terrified of it though. If they tell him they hate him, Jungkook might never recover. He hates that despite everything, despite almost _dying_ he still priatorizes the others over himself.

 

Yugyeom takes him home, and the pair relax like they used to. There is still a heavy aura floating around in the apartment, but the two are able to relax. Jungkook is alive. The two boys are content with letting that thought consume them.

 

He’s alive.

 

Over the next week Jungkook is so extremely careful. He probably looks crazy to some of his neighbors. He goes extremely out of the way to avoid the others. He takes the longest route to school, so the others won’t find him. When classes end for the day Jungkook waits at least two hours, before heading in the complete opposite direction of his home. He receives messages too, there are so many of them, that Jungkook silences his phone.

 

So in short,

 

He’s been avoiding them really well.

 

Yugyeom reprimands him for it most days.

 

Today Jungkook has to go grab art supplies for his next project. He goes to a completely different store than he would normally go to, and heads out. He’s wearing that yellow jacket again, and Jungkook is strangely comforted by it. He gets to the store, and grabs the supplies he needs. He talks to the cashier, who is a very sweet girl, who is also studying art. Jungkook and the girl talk for a bit until more customers come. He says goodbye, and then heads out.

 

It’s a bit later into the day, and Jungkook is starving. He walks for a bit, and lands at a restaurant that serves lamb skewers. He smiles to himself, before walking inside.

 

It’s weird for him to be eating alone like this, but it isn’t bad. He thinks about Yoongi in that moment, and every time the pair came to a place like this. He thinks of Yoongi and his eyes, his smile, and his smell. Jungkook leans back, and he can almost feel the elder next to him. How his eyes would trace over him, how the elder would ruffle his hair, and give him that wide gummy smile. The smile that made him falter every time he saw it.

 

_He wants to see him._

 

The waitress delivers the food, and Jungkook thanks her.

 

He devours the food quickly, and pays just as fast. It’s late into the evening, and Jungkook decides to go for a walk. He lets Yugyeom know, lord knows if he didn’t Yugyeom would freak.

 

_Gyeommie (16:47)_

 

_Do you want me to come with?_

 

Jungkook chuckles, he knows the other boy is worried.

 

_Me (16:48)_

 

_If you would feel better coming with me, by all means you can._

 

_Gyeommie (16:51)_

 

_No, it’s okay… I need to talk to the others about something anyways._

 

_Me (16:51)_

 

_What is it??_

 

_Gyeommie (16:52)_

 

_Wouldn’t you like to know :P_

 

_Me (16:53)_

 

_Hey! No fair, seriously is everything okay? You seem worried._

 

_Gyeommie (16:55)_

 

_Yeah, I think…_

 

_Gyeommie (16:56)_

 

_I think I’m going to confess to them._

 

Jungkook chokes on the air.

 

_Me (16:58)_

 

 _Seriously?? Are you sure you’re ready for that?_ _  
_   
Gyeommie (17:01)

 

_Nope! But after everything with you, I don’t want something like that to even possibly happen. I told them I had something to tell them and I’m going to head over to Mark-hyung’s house soon._

 

_Me (17:03)_

 

_Okay, whatever happens I’ll be right here. Call me later okay? I doubt that they’ll hate you even if they don’t like you like that._

 

_Gyeommie (17:04)_

 

_I suggest you take your own advice._

 

Jungkook huffs out a breath. He knows saying that makes him a bit of a hypocrite, but he just doesn’t have the courage do anything about it. He wishes the boy luck, and prays to whichever god might be listening.

 

_Please let him be happy._

 

Jungkook goes on his walk throughout the city, it’s peaceful, tranquil, and Jungkook gets lost in the feeling. He sees the dance studio he used to go to with Hoseok and Jimin. He thinks of the times the three could dance the night away. How Jimin would leans against him and laugh right in his ear. Jungkook loved his laugh. He also remembers Hoseok’s bright smile, his warm touches. Jungkook feels his hand tingle as a phantom hand, ghosts over his palm.

 

_He wants to see them._

 

He looks up towards the sky, and wonders if it might snow. The sky is cloudy, and with how cold it is, Jungkook thinks the possibility is there. He continues walking and walking and walking. He ends up at the study hall Namjoon would take him to for tutoring. He thinks of the elder’s big hands, his deep voice, and glowing eyes. Namjoon made Jungkook weak just by looking at him, and Jungkook presses a palm against his chest.

 

_He wants to see him._

 

Jungkook spins around on his heel, and walks down to the path leading towards the river. He doesn’t plan on doing anything, he honestly just wants to sit for a moment.

 

He sits down a few feet away from the river, and thinks of Jin. The elders dumb jokes, his bright laugh, and charming face. Jungkook leans back feeling a ghost of Jin’s lips on his forehead. He touches his it and smiles softly. Jin always made him feel safe. Like he was wrapped up in this blanket. Jin felt like home.

 

_He wants to see him._

 

It’s very late into the evening, and Jungkook decides it’s time to go home. He still hasn’t received a call or message from Yugyeom, but Jungkook has a feeling the other boy is okay. He’s not sure where the feeling comes from, but he decides to trust it. Jungkook heads home, but he takes his time. Looks at the people passing by, and focuses on their expressions. Jungkook likes to try and read them. As Jungkook looks at the people, he notices a certain girl in the crowd.

 

She’s tiny in the big crowd, but she’s laughing wildly with her friends. She has a big smile, and Jungkook laughs to himself.

 

_It’s boxy._

 

Jungkook realizes that he’s staring at Taehyung’s younger sister, and he can’t help but smile at how well she’s grown. She looks so much better than before. She’s had to have graduated high school by now, and Jungkook wonders how she is.

 

More importantly he wonders how Taehyung is.

 

Jungkook thinks of the boy, and sighs. He remembers every moment they shared. Taehyung’s smile, his cuddles, and his eyes. Jungkook can almost hear the other boys voice, and he once again clutches at his heart. He misses him.

 

_He wants to see him._

 

Jungkook watches the younger girl leave with her friends, and Jungkook smiles bitterly.

 

They remind him of his own friends.

 

The lonely boy heads home, still taking a longer route than normal. As he gets closer to home, he feels something fall on his nose. He looks up and sees the first snow of the year falling from the sky.

 

The boy grins, because despite how lonely he might be, seeing the snow always gets him excited. He sticks a tongue out and catches snowflakes. Jungkook twirls around in the snow, and he pretends he’s all alone.

 

He pretends he didn’t almost die last week.

 

He pretends he doesn’t hate himself for it.

 

He pretends he doesn’t love his friends.

 

He pretends.

 

Jungkook sags against a wall, and continues to watch the snow fall.

 

He doesn’t want to go home.

 

Without Yugyeom there, it’s very lonely for Jungkook, and since he hasn’t spoken to the others as of late there’s no way he could go to them. Jungkook stays there for a bit longer, and he finally gets up when his hands grow numb.

 

He’s tired, and Jungkook prays he can get an adequate amount of sleep tonight. He sees the apartment complex up ahead, and Jungkook hurries along. He just wants to take a shower, watch some stupid movies, and-

 

“Jungkook?”

 

Said boy freezes in place. He whips his head around and see Jimin looking at him with wide eyes. Jungkook’s eyes widen in terror.

 

Dammit,

 

He forgot to be careful.

 

It just slipped his mind.

 

Jungkook watches as Jimin takes a step towards him, but Jungkook can’t handle it. He takes one step back, and once again like he’s done every time he’s ever confronted by a problem he doesn’t know how to solve-

 

He runs.

 

Jimin yells his name, but Jungkook is already halfway towards his apartment complex. He bursts through the doors and takes the stairwell sprinting as fast as he can. He hears the door open and labored breathing, and Jungkook keeps running. He pushes the door open, and he’s surprised it doesn’t pop off it’s hinges.

 

Jungkook continue running towards his apartment door, and unlocks it with surprisingly ease.

 

**_“JUNGKOOK!”_ **

 

The boy pauses for just a moment, and perhaps that is what leads to his downfall. Because it’s not just Jimin that stands there. Taehyung stands directly in front of him with tears streaming down his face. Jungkook can’t bear to look at them any longer, so he throws the door open. He slams it shut, listens to the two boys bang on the door relentlessly.

 

_“Jungkook!”_

 

_“Kookie please!!”_

 

Jungkook slides against the door, with a thud. He’s scared, and he’s such a coward. They deserve more, they deserve to talk to him, but Jungkook isn’t ready for the rejection that will surely come. He takes in a shuddery breath, and waits for them to leave.

 

_They don't._

 

In fact Jungkook hears one of them talk to someone on the phone, and the youngest knows it has to be one of the elders.

 

Maybe an hour later, he hears more voices.

 

He knows it’s his hyungs.

 

Jungkook prays they’ll leave, he knows he should go to his room, stay away from the door, but it’s like a magnet. He remains stuck.

 

About an hour later he gets a call from Yugyeom.

 

“Hello?”

 

Jungkook talks quietly as to not alert the other boys.

 

_“So, you mind explaining why there are six boys standing in front of our apartment door?”_

 

Jungkook sighs, “Jimin saw me, and I panicked.”

 

_“Jesus, Kook. You need to talk to them, how many times do I need to tell you avoiding won’t do anything?”_

 

“Sorry, are they going to leave?”

 

_“Nope, Jimin says he’s ready to camp out here until you come out.”_

 

Jungkook blows out hair, “Of course he would.”

 

_“Listen, some... things occurred tonight at Mark-hyung’s-”_

 

“Is everything okay?”

 

 _“Yeah, things are actually really good. That’s besides the point, I’m unlocking the door, and you’re going to_ talk _to them.”_

 

“Yugyeom wait-”

 

His roommate however hangs up on him, and Jungkook is stuck staring at the door. He sits down, and waits trying to quell all of his anxiety. The doorknob clicks, and Jungkook hears Yugyeom’s muffled voice. He tries to imagine the door locking, maybe he has some super power maybe this is all a dream-

 

The door cracks open,

 

Jungkook tries not to vomit.

 

Despite everything Jungkook can’t stop that door from opening. Not anymore. He looks up to see Namjoon standing in front of him. The others trail behind, and Jungkook sits up a bit straighter. He notices Jin’s exhausted expression, and Jungkook smiles at him weakly. Jin lets out a relieved sigh, and smiles at the youngest warmly. Jungkook can tell that this is going to go in a completely different direction than his negative mind took him.

 

He looks up to Namjoon who looks equally as tired, he leans against Jin and stares at Jungkook thoroughly. It’s almost as if he’s searching for any other issue until his eyes finally land on Jungkook’s face. Jungkook smiles at him, and Namjoon sags. He seems much less stressed than before, and looks over his shoulder.

 

Jungkook sees Yoongi and Hoseok next.

 

Hoseok looks horrible. His eyes are extremely red and puffy, and he looks about ready to fall. He stares at Jungkook for a long while, and then smiles softly. Tears leak out of his eyes, and Jungkook lets out a shuddery breath. He hates seeing Hoseok cry. He always will.

 

Yoongi doesn’t look much better. He may seem much more composed, but Jungkook can see how pale he is. He sees how his face crinkles with worry, and how his wander all over him just like Namjoon. Yoongi looks him the eyes, and sighs.

 

“Dumb brat.”

 

Jungkook can't help but let out a watery laugh.

 

Finally Jungkook turns to Jimin and Taehyung.

 

They by far look the worst off.

 

Jimin has an arm wrapped around Taehyung, and the other boy holds just as tightly. They look at Jungkook as if he is about to disappear, and to be fair he almost did. Jungkook sees how Jimin’s legs shake from all of the running, and how his face is red and blotchy from crying no doubt.

 

Taehyung… God he looks terrible.

 

Taehyung doesn’t really show an emotion on his face, but he still looks like someone just killed his dog. His eyes are swollen and he still has tears running down his face. Taehyung looks at Jungkook like he’s his whole world, and Jungkook isn’t sure how to handle it.

 

Jungkook looks down. He’s so scared, and he has no clue on where to start.

 

“Did you mean it?”

 

Jungkook looks at Yoongi, “Mean what?”

 

Yoongi cocks his head to the side, “That night, did you mean what you told us?”

 

Jungkook looks down, “You mean how I confessed that I’m in love with all of you?”

 

The second eldest nods and Jungkook sighs, “Yes, I- I’ve been in love with you for so long. It wasn’t hard, all of you are incredible and my heart just couldn’t handle it.”

 

“Then why did you get us together?” Namjoon asks clearly confused.

 

Jungkook lets out a broken laugh, “Once I saw how you started liking Jin-hyung, I didn’t want my feelings to get in the way. I figured that even if it wasn’t with me, you being happy was all that mattered for me to be happy..”

 

“I uh, _I was wrong about that though_ ,” Jungkook whispers.

 

Namjoon gets this look on his face, “Kook-ah, why would you- Why do you always put us before yourself?”

 

Jungkook looks away, “I- I don’t know. I just… I love you so much, and I want you to be happy. If that means sacrificing a few things that’s okay I can live with that.”

 

“Well I can’t.”

 

Jin looks at him fiercely, “I don’t want you ever saying that again. You deserve all the happiness in the world, and I’m so sorry I didn’t notice.”

 

Jungkook looks away, “I didn’t want you to notice, I hid it so no one knew, but then things got so complicated. I was so upset with myself and how envious I was. I was the one who got you together, and then I pushed you away because of it. It wasn’t right of me to do that.”

 

Jin runs a hand through his hair, “How is it the only one who can’t see how worth it you are is you, Jungkook?”

 

Jungkook looks up at the eldest at a loss for words. He has no idea on what to say, and so he looks down.

 

“Jungkook-”

 

Jungkook closes his eyes tightly before looking up, he owes this to them at least. He looks at Hobi who has moved closer, and is now leaning forward in his space. Jungkook looks up with tear filled eyes. He hates seeing Hoseok cry, and he can’t handle all of the emotions. He’s still so unbelievably scared. They haven’t even talked about his feelings for them, and Jungkook is terrified it means rejection.

 

Hoseok grabs his hands, and lets out a sob.

 

“God we we’re so scared, Jungkook don’t you _ever_ do something like this again,” he orders.

 

Jungkook huffs out a laugh, “I’m sorry hyung, I just- Everything seemed to be crashing down on me and I just-”

 

“It’s okay Kook-ah,” Yoongi tells him, “you’re alive, and that’s all that matters to us.”

 

“I think it’s time we had a talk though,” he finishes looking at their leader.

 

Namjoon turns to Jungkook and smiles. Then he glances at Taehyung and Jimin, and nods.

 

Taehyung lets go of Jimin and stands up straight.

 

“Jungkook, you were an absolute idiot, I was so _fucking_ scared you were going to die, if you did I wouldn’t have ever forgiven you. Then you go off and avoid us, and we couldn’t even check up on you. I just wanted to know if you were okay and _fuck-_ God I can't stop crying… But… what I mean to say is, you’re _here_ your alive and I just-”

 

Taehyung hiccups, and tears flow freely.

 

“God, I was so _scared_ Yugyeom was trying so hard to get you breathing again, and I was so sure we were too late. Then of course you manage to come back throwing up all that water, which was gross by the way.”

 

Jungkook can’t help but laugh despite the circumstances. Taehyung cracks a smile of his own, and then he takes in a deep breath.

 

“You meant what you said though? You seriously love all of us?” Taehyung asks.

 

Jungkook looks away guiltily, “I-Yes but don’t worry I can get over this we can go back to like it was-”

 

“Nah, I don’t wanna go back to that.”

 

Jungkook looks at Taehyung surprised, “What do mean by that Tae?”

 

Taehyung strides forward and grabs Jungkook’s face in his hands before crashing their lips together. Jungkook literally _squeaks_ in surprise, and he feels Taehyung smile into the kiss.

 

“I love you,” he whispers.

 

“I love you”

 

“I love you _so much_ ”

 

“Don’t you _ever_ do that to me again.”

 

“God I love you so much, please don’t you _ever_ leave me.”

 

Taehyung repeats the words over and over again, and Jungkook looks at him with wide eyes. Taehyung just smiles and rests his forehead against his own. Jungkook stares into his eyes, and feels his face crumple. He hugs Taehyung tightly, praying he won’t ever have to let him go. Taehyung holds him equally as tightly, and Jungkook feels something wet on his shoulder.

 

If this is a dream Jungkook prays he’ll never wake up.

 

He smiles so happily at Taehyung, “I love you so much Tae, I love you _so much._ I never thought you would love me back I just-”

 

Taehyung cuts him off with a quick kiss, Jungkook’s face heats up and Taehyung smiles in response.

 

“I fell in love with you in highschool, it wasn’t hard. You were always so adorable and sweet, but then with my dad, when everything was so terrible I expected you to run away, but… but you were always there. I always knew that I was safe as long as I had you by my side,” Taehyung tells him with a smile.

 

Jungkook feels his breath hitch, “Oh my god, you-”

 

He looks at everyone and it makes sense. Almost as if a curtain is lifted up, he sees everything so much more clearly now.

 

He sees how Taehyung would turn beat red when Jungkook initiated contact.

 

He remembers how Jimin would hold onto him, and smile towards him like he was the sun.

 

He thinks about the time Jin would kiss him and hold him tightly as if he was protecting him.

 

He thinks about the times Yoongi would grab his hand, and just hold it during the day while they worked.

 

He remembers how Hoseok would hug him tightly, cuddle with him, and smother him with love.

 

He sees every time Namjoon got flustered, not by Jin, but by _him_.

 

How is he so oblivious?

 

Jungkook lets out a sob, he can't believe it, but he still needs to hear it. He grabs Tae, and looks up at the others with tears streaming down his face.

 

“I- Do you, do you love me too?” He asks whispering so quietly.

 

The others can tell he's extremely scared, terrified that they’ll reject him.

 

_They would never._

 

Each boy fell in love with Jungkook along the way.

 

Each boy fell in love with him before they even thought about the other’s as a love interest.

 

Jimin fell in love with his voice, Jin fell in love with his spirit, Yoongi fell in love with his smile, Hoseok fell in love with his laugh, Namjoon fell in love with his heart.

 

Namjoon smiles warmly, it's big and wide and full of so much love. Jungkook covers his mouth to stop the pathetic noises of his crying. Despite how he may look Jungkook is overjoyed.

 

“We love you too,” Namjoon whispers.

 

Jungkook bends over and buries his face in his hands. He sobs and laughs all at the same time. Taehyung hugs him tightly and rests his head against his own.

 

“We love you so much Kookie,” he whispers.

 

The others step forward, and Hoseok grabs his hand. He kisses it, and Jungkook _feels_ something connect with his heart. It feels almost like a puzzle piece.

 

Yoongi comes forward as well smiling brightly, and ruffling his hair. Jungkook feels that puzzle piece feeling once more, and he grows warmer and warmer.

 

Jin comes on the other side and kisses his forehead lightly, and again there's a pop in his heart. Jungkook huffs out a laugh and leans against him. He's so unbelievably happy, and his heart feels... fuller?

 

Namjoon grabs his other hand and squeezes it tightly. He gives the boy a big smile, and his eyes lock on onto his own. Jungkook sees every emotion that swirls in them, and he smiles widely. His heart clicks again and Jungkook feels warmer and warmer.

 

The others part to let Jimin through and the older boy throws himself at the youngest. He wraps his arms around his waist and Jungkook feels him shake. Jungkook runs his fingers through his hair, and smiles. Jimin looks up at him, and Jungkook feels his heart skip a beat. His heart clicks again, and he looks at Taehyung who smiles sweetly at him. Jungkook feels his heart click one more time, and he realizes he feels whole again.

 

Jungkook's heart is complete again.

 

He gave each boy a piece of his heart,

 

And they gave him one right back.

 

Jungkook wipes away at his eyes, “God I was _so stupid_.”

 

Yoongi huffs out a laugh, “To be fair, we all were.”

 

The other boys chuckle at this, and Jimin looks into Jungkook’s eyes passionately. The youngest feels his face heat up, and Jimin sends him the smile, you know _the smile._

 

“Kookie? Can I kiss you now?” the other boy asks.

 

Jungkook’s eyes widen comically, and he nods unable to get the words out of his mouth.

 

Jimin rises from his spot, and rests his hand on his face. Jungkook blushes madly, and Jimin smiles, no no, _smirks_.

 

“You’re so cute,” he whispers before leaning in.

 

Kissing Jimin is different, with Tae there was this desperation from the pair that had been longing for that moment for years. Jimin takes his time, he makes it soft and rough and _oh my god._ Jimin literally bites on his lip, and Jungkook whines. He feels Jimin smile against him, and then he leans back. Jungkook’s eyes flutter open, and Jimin is still there, so close to his face. Jungkook thinks about every moment the pair shared, and how much Jungkook wanted to do this.

 

Jungkook lets out a shuddery breath, and Jimin looks at him worriedly.

 

“Kookie? What’s wrong? Was it bad?” the elder asks worriedly.

 

Jungkook laughs, “No Jiminnie, it was perfect _you_ are perfect.”

 

The youngest leans back and smiles at him, “I just wanted to do that to you for so long, and I’m _so, so, happy._ ”

 

Jimin looks at him with wide eyes, and hugs him tightly. Jungkook feels a few tears slip past, but he’s happy. He’s so happy. His best friends love him. The first two people he ever fell in love with, love him back. It’s not over though, there are four other people in this room after all.

 

He leans back laughing. He looks at the elders who are all standing in front of him. He smiles so warmly and reaches a hand out.

 

“Come here, please,” he whispers.

 

None of the elders know who exactly he’s talking to so they all come forward. The maknaes move out of the way, and smile brightly at Jungkook. He looks at each of the members faces, and lets a relieved sigh.

 

Jin smiles at the youngest, and steps forward.

 

“When I first met you I knew you had me wrapped around your finger. You were this adorable kid, who had the sweetest smile. I wanted to protect you from everything but in the end you protected me,” Jin tells him with a smile.

 

“When my family showed up I was surprised how you stood up to them, you seemed so strong, and I admired you for it Jungkook,” the eldest tells him.

 

Jungkook laughs weakly, “I hated seeing you being attacked like that. I tend to get a little over protected of my friends.”

 

“That’s an understatement,” Jin and Namjoon say at the same time.

 

Jin steps forward kissing his forehead. Jungkook melts into it, and Jin holds him closely.

 

“I always knew you liked my kisses,” Jin whispers.

 

Jungkook _giggles_ , “They’re soft and warm, and they make me feel safe.”

 

“What do you mean Kook-ah?” Jin asks him.

 

Jungkook just smiles, “You make me feel safe, your smiles, kisses, and hugs. It's like wrapping me in a warm blanket of protection and love. It was how I knew I was in love with you.”

 

Jin looks him with wide eyes. His face breaks out into a smile, and just as quickly Jin dives in for a kiss. Jin's lips are big and plush, and wow he is scarily good at this. If Jungkook was standing his knees would surely buckle.

 

Jin makes him feel hot and cool at the same time, and the youngest clings to Jin's shirt tightly.

 

Jin leans back his eyes fluttering open. He laughs at Jungkook's dazed expression and beet red face. Jungkook fiddles with his hair, Jin kisses him quickly. It's short but Jungkook can feel his love and he smiles into it.

 

He's happy.

 

So so happy.

 

The youngest lets out a laugh that is full of so much light. The older boys look at him affectionately, and once Jungkook notices it, and he can't stop his face that heats up.

 

Yoongi clears his throat then, and Jungkook looks up at the second eldest.

 

“Jungkook, you.. You were always a brat,” Yoongi tells him.

 

Jungkook can’t hold in the snort of laughter upon hearing that.

 

Yoongi huffs out a laugh, “You were this mysterious kid, that seemed so much older than you were. Then you would completely flip and act like a six year old.”

 

The maknae looks down with a soft smile, he always loved to tease the elders. Especially Yoongi. It was fun for Jungkook to bother him, sling an arm around him, and talk endlessly.

 

“I acted like I hated it, but we both know that isn't true,” he mutters.

 

Yoongi takes a deep breath, “That night when you saw us, I saw so much hurt in your eyes. It was then I realized what had happened what you had done.”

 

“I hated seeing you so upset,” he whispers, “you broke down, and none of us were prepared.”

 

Yoongi grabs his hands and squeezes tightly, “You know I'm not great at expressing my emotions but-”

 

Yoongi looks him in the eyes, his eyes pierce through Jungkook, and the youngest knows he’s done for. Yoongi leans in kissing him chastely, its soft and sweet, and so so warm. Jungkook feels his heart leap into his throat, and his face burns.

 

Yoongi leans back sending him a beautiful smile. He rests his hands on his cheeks, and kisses him again. The pair take in deep breaths before Yoongi leans back.

 

“I love you so much you dumb brat.”

 

Jungkook laughs, and hugs the elder tightly. Yoongi returns it easily, and kisses his hair. It's intimate, and beautiful and Jungkook feels more tears come.

 

He's happy,

 

So so happy.

 

Jungkook feels a hand on his neck, and he looks up right before Hoseok kisses him deeply. Jungkook shuts his eyes and kisses back fervently. Kissing Hoseok is exactly how Jungkook imagined it to be. It's warm, incredible so, and Jungkook feels like the sun is shining upon him.

 

When Hobi pulls away Jungkook fucking _whines_ and Hoseok looks at him mischievously.

 

 _God he is_ _so screwed._

 

“I thought you were dead,” Hoseok whispers.

 

Jungkook looks away guiltily but Hoseok is holding his face.

 

“Hey, it's okay, I mean it isn't not really, but you're here,” Hoseok says holding onto his hand.

 

Jungkook smiles, “I'm still sorry.”

 

Hoseok looks him in the eyes and smiles. It's not as big as his normal smiles, but Jungkook knows the emotion is the same. His eyes hold so much love it completely wrecks Jungkook to the floor.

 

“I love you hyung,” he whispers.

 

Hoseok lets out a breath he didn't realize he was holding. He wraps Jungkook in a tight hug and kisses his face all over.

 

“I love you too Kook-ah. I love you _so much,_ and I'm going to tell you everyday.”

 

Hoseok squeezes him tightly, and then leans back. Hoseok smiles like the sun, and Jungkook absorbs it happily. Hoseok pecks him on the cheek one last time, and Jungkook knows he’s burning.

 

He’s happy.

 

Incredibly happy.

 

The leader then stands in front of Jungkook. He towers over the boy, and Jungkook fears the elder is mad. Namjoon looks at him as if he's staring straight into his soul. Namjoon bends down and cups Jungkook's face in his hands.

 

Jungkook notices his face that grows redder and redder, and Jungkook can't help but laugh. Namjoon looks away embarrassed and it's enough for Jungkook to take charge.

 

He grabs the back of Namjoons neck, and leans forward pecking him sweetly. Jungkook starts to lean back shy and nervous, but Namjoon drags him back in. The leaders lips are rough, and Jungkook is pushed back as the elder kisses him fervently.

 

Once Namjoon pulls away, Jungkook leans back in the chair all the way.

 

Jungkook shyly looks up at his leader, and he smiles softly. Namjoon smiles as well and rests his lips on the corner of Jungkook's forehead.

 

The youngest feels his heart beat a little faster, and god Jungkook doesn't understand how Namjoon as this effect on him.

 

“I love you Kook-ah,” he whispers.

 

“I have for so long, maybe it was after that fight, or when we went to your house, I don't know, but don't ever forget-”

 

“We love you too.”

 

Jungkook’s eyes glisten with unshed tears, and he wipes them away before they have a chance to spill. He looks up at the leader, and then hugs him tightly.

 

“I'm sorry hyung, I know you worried,” he mumbles into Namjoons chest.

 

Namjoon lets out a soft cry, and then he's hugging the younger boy tightly.

 

“I love you so much Kook-ah, don't you _ever_ do that to me again,” he says into the maknaes shoulder.

 

Jungkook clings to the elder and he absorbs everything in. He feels the leaders big hands card through his hair, and Jungkook presses as close as he can.

 

“I love you too hyung, I promise I won't do it again, I just- I'm sorry, everything was just _so much_ and I-”

 

Namjoon shushes him softly, and kisses him one more.

 

“It's okay Kookie, you’re here, and we are _never_ letting you go,” he whispers.

 

He kisses the maknae one last time, and Jungkook _knows_ his lips but be bruised. Namjoon pushes him back, and Jungkook feels like he's being sucked in more and more. Finally the elder leans back a glint in his eyes.

 

“I thought you were the shy one?” Jungkook mumbles.

 

Namjoon _smirks_ , “When it comes to this I have to take charge. There's no way I'm letting you leave without knowing how much I want you. How much _we_ want you.”

 

Jungkook stares at him for a moment before his head tilts over the chair, and he groans. The others giggle at their maknae, and Jungkook looks at them with a beautiful smile.

 

It causes all of the boys to freeze on spot, and they all feel pink travel to their cheeks.

 

They love him.

 

And he loves them.

 

Taehyung gives him his boxy smile, and pulls the boy towards him. Jimin curls his arms around his waist, and effectively traps the boy in a sandwiched hug. Jungkook laughs brightly, and rests his forehead against Taehyung’s shoulder.

 

“I'm sorry for being so oblivious,” Jungkook tells them.

 

Taehyung pulls back cradling his face, “Hey, don't apologize. We all were a little oblivious. I thought you might've liked me, but then the others came and you acted the same around them.”

 

“We all thought it was platonic love, and we though you didn't like any of us,” Hoseok tells him.

 

Jungkook pauses, “Wait, hold on. That guy you talked about, the one who didn't like you-”

 

“That was you,” Yoongi tells him.

 

Jungkook buries his face in his hands, “Jesus Christ, I didn't even realize it!”

 

Jimin pats his back, “It's okay Kookie, we all know the truth now right?”

 

Jungkook nods, “I know, but _still-_ ”

 

“Aish, listen to your hyungs,” Jin tells him, “everything is going to be okay now. We love you Kookie.”

 

Jungkook looks at the eldest and melts, “Okay, and.. I love you too.”

 

Jungkook looks away as his cheeks burn red. The others coo at him, and the boy turns even redder.

 

“Oh Jungkookie, you’re going to be the death of us all,” Hobi tells him.

 

Jungkook looks up finally, and tucks a strand of his hair behind his ear. The others admire him for a moment. He’s always been adorable, but they realize it isn’t just that. Jungkook always made them feel this burst of happiness.

 

Taehyung exclaims, “It’s time for sleep!”

 

Jungkook looks at him incredulously, “Tae, there’s no room!”

 

“There will be,” Yoongi replies.

 

Hoseok and the second eldest disappear before coming out with Jungkook and Yugyeom’s mattresses.

 

“W-What are you doing?” he asks.

 

Jin smiles wrapping an arm around his waist, “We just got you back, there’s no way we're letting you out of our sight.”

 

Taehyung comes from behind squeezing him tight, “And there’s no way we’re letting you go.”

 

Jungkook feels his heart come to life, and the feeling is infectious. It brings a smile to Jungkook’s face, and his eyes glow. The boys set up the beds, and grab a multitude of blankets. Taehyung and Jin lead him towards the center, and Jungkook plops down. Tae immediately dives for the spot next to him, and no one complains about it.

 

Jimin lays on his other side, effectively tangling their limbs together. Jungkook remembers moments like these with the younger two, but now it means something completely different.

 

The others join them, and Jungkook feels Hobi grab his hand. Jungkook sees how Hoseok holds onto Jimin, and sees how Hoseok grabbed Jungkook’s hand from underneath Jimin’s arm. Hoseok smiles so brightly, and it forces the boy to return it. There’s no way you can’t smile with Hobi.

 

Jin positions himself beside Taehyung, and he kisses Jungkook’s forehead before lying down. Jungkook touches his forehead softly, and remembers how he imagined Jin earlier.

 

The real thing is _so_ much better.

 

When Yoongi crouches over him for a moment, Jungkook doesn’t think he can take any more affection from the others.

 

Okay,

 

That might be a lie.

 

Yoongi smiles so so softly, it’s that gummy smile that always sets Jungkook off. The elder kneels down, and grabs his hand.

 

“This is embarrassing, but I want you to know how much I love you,” he whispers.

 

Yoongi leans in kissing his hand, and then slides up towards his lips. Jungkook feels how his breath ghosts over his skin until he leans up to meet the elder. His quick, but the feelings are there, and Jungkook is going to _burst_.

 

When he finally notices Namjoon looking over him, Jungkook knows he’s done for. The elder bends down on one knee, and ruffles his hair affectionately.

 

“You aren’t ever leaving us Kookie,” he tells him.

 

Jungkook knows there are two meanings to what the leader said, and he also knows that Namjoon meant both of them.

 

“I don’t plan on it,” Jungkook says smiling.

 

Namjoon’s eyes soften with affection, and very quickly he pecks him on the lips. He sits down behind Hobi, and wraps his arms around the rappers torso. Jungkook looks at the boys to his right, and then the boys on his left. He’s never felt so… whole in his entire life, and Jungkook feels himself melting into the bed.

 

More importantly, the boy’s arms.

 

Jungkook feels his heart burn with love and affection for the boys, and it feels like his whole body is just overflowing with happiness. Jungkook remembers a word that describes it. What was it again.

 

Oh yeah,

 

_Euphoria_

 

He thinks it’s a good word to describe how he feels about the boys, when he’s with them, and when he’s talking about them. They make him happy, so so happy. Jungkook yawns, and he realizes that all of this made him very tired. His eyes shut closed, and he curls into Jimin mumbling. Throughout the whole night, Jungkook remains asleep in the arms of the ones he loves.

 

But even in the dark anyone could see,

 

How big his smile was.

  
  


**SO,**

 

**I may have gotten a tad excited. Originally this was going to come out much later like next wednesday probably? But then you guys commented a bunch, and I got a tad over excited. I probably spoil you too much ;), but seriously guys thank you so much and follow my instagram or twitter ig: musclebunni and twitter: Muscle_Bunni, seriously I’d love to talk to you guys, and I post stupid crap. Anyways thanks for reading and I hope to see you next chapter!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And finally our story comes to an end.

The morning comes too quickly for Jungkook.

 

The light streams in through the window, and shines in his eyes. He murmurs slightly to himself, and registers the feeling of a body beside him. Memories of last night burn into his brain, and even though logically Jungkook knows it has to be one of the boys next to him-

 

He’s still scared it was all a dream.

 

Jungkook however also knows he needs to face this. He’s realized now that he has a very bad tendency with avoiding his problems, and it’s not exactly healthy. So slowly and shakily, Jungkook opens his eyes.

 

He’s met by a _beautiful_ sight.

 

He’s not sure when but it seems Yoongi took Jimin’s spot, and is currently inches away from his face. The elder looks peaceful, serene, and Jungkook thinks he looks like an angel. He smiles so warmly, and looks on the other side to see Taehyung still wrapped around him. Jungkook feels his heart stutter, and his smile continues to grow.

 

It wasn’t a dream.

 

They’re here.

 

Jungkook looks around for the others, and sees Hoseok beside Yoongi wrapping his arms around him like an octopus. The other three, Jungkook can’t find.

 

Very carefully, Jungkook slides out of the boy’s grasp, and watches how Taehyung rolls over trying to find that warmth. Yoongi reaches his arms out and finds Tae in the process. Jungkook can’t help but giggle at the pair, and sets out to find the others.

 

He wanders into the kitchen half expecting Jin to be there, but alas the eldest isn’t there. Jungkook goes throughout the whole apartment, and doesn’t see any of them.

 

_FLUSH~_

 

Jungkook pauses hearing the toilet, and he skips over to the bathroom.

 

Namjoon opens the door, and almost falls upon seeing the youngest.

 

“Jungkook!” He exclaims, “Don’t scare me like that!”

 

Jungkook laughs, “Careful hyung, the others are still sleeping.”

 

Namjoon peaks out, and sure enough the others are still snoring away. Namjoon huffs out a laugh, before turning to the maknae.

 

“How you feeling?” he asks softly.

 

Jungkook smiles brightly, “I’m feeling good. Better than ever.”

 

Namjoon smiles and wraps the boy in a hug, “I’m glad, now let’s relax before the others wake up. I want some alone time with our youngest.”

 

Jungkook buries himself in Namjoons neck, “Hyung you’re so embarrassing.”

 

“Yah! Don’t be rude,” Namjoon tells him.

 

“Where are Jiminnie and Jin-hyung by the way?” Jungkook asks.

 

Namjoon runs a hand through his hair, “Grabbing food for everyone, you didn’t have much to cook with, and Jin-hyung didn’t like all of the instant ramen he saw”

 

Jungkook looks away sheepishly, “To be fair, not all of it is mine.”

 

The elder chuckles, and ruffles his hair affectionately, “Whatever you say maknae.”

 

Ultimately they migrate to Jungkook’s room that is currently missing it’s mattress, but the pair don’t seem to mind. Namjoon plops down on the floor, and Jungkook turns the tv on. He’s still unsure on what exactly he should do, or what he and Namjoon are towards one another now. Regardless he plops down beside him, and rests against his shoulder.

 

The tv show might be good, but Jungkook just focuses on Namjoon.

 

How warm he is,

 

How his smile radiates,

 

And how his eyes flicker towards him.

 

They lock eyes in that moment, and Jungkook feels his face flush. Namjoon’s cheeks turn red, and he looks down shyly. Jungkook can’t help but laugh, and he leans up kissing the side of his cheek quickly.

 

Namjoon grins, “And you call me embarrassing.”

 

Jungkook smiles despite the teasing, “I don’t mind if it’s because of that.”

 

“Aish you brat,” Namjoon mutters before leaning down.

 

Once more like last night, the elder captures his lips, and Jungkook flys up on cloud nine. Jungkook leans forward, and Namjoon shifts him until the youngest is practically sitting on his lap. It’s so intimate that Jungkook feels as if they are literally melting into one another.

 

“Easy hyung, this is making me have some nasty thoughts.”

 

The couple jump back, and Taehyung stands by the door smirking. Jungkook and Namjoon both flush bright red, and look down. Taehyung laughs, and then join the two.

 

He plops a very sloppy and wet kisses on their foreheads, and then gently kisses Jungkook. He stays there for a while, and Jungkook relishes the feeling. When they lean back, Jungkook stares at the other with half lidded eyes.

 

Jungkook leans back against Namjoon covering his face, “Ahhhh, you two are going to cause me to combust.”

 

The two boys laugh, and Jungkook hears the door open. The trio stand up, and go outside to see who came inside.

 

Jin and Jimin both come inside, carrying bags of food. They set the food down, and Jungkook watches as Jimin looks at the mattress confusedly before his eyes land on the boys down the hallway. He watches as Jimin’s face lights up, and he skips towards the youngest quickly.

 

“Kookie!”

 

He immediately leans up kissing the younger of the two quickly. Jimin doesn’t stay long ultimately leaning back, and dragging the boy to the kitchen.

 

“Jin-hyung and I got food for everyone, so help us set the table!” Jimin tells him.

 

Jungkook laughs, and watches the other boys stir from their sleep. Jin glances over his shoulder at the youngest, and his face breaks out into a smile.

 

Jungkook ducks his head down, still extremely shy and unsure. Jin doesn't seem to mind, in fact he gently grabs Jungkook's face and kisses him sweetly.

 

Jungkook can't remember a time he's felt like this.

 

He’s never kissed anyone, he's always been too hung up on the others. He's so glad his first was with the boys though. Jungkook looks dazed when Jin leans back, and the eldest coos at him. Jungkook looks away blushing once more, and sets the table quickly.

 

The last two boys are now slowly rising, but Jungkook can tell they’re still wiping the sleep from their eyes. Very quickly without thinking, Jungkook leaps over and kisses both boys on the forehead. He attempts to skip away, but Hobi is _much_ faster than he thought he was.

 

“And where do you think you’re going?!”

 

Jungkook shrieks as he is pulled down onto the mattress, and Hoseok cages him in. His breath tingles on the nape of his neck, and Jungkook really thinks he's turning into jello.

 

Yoongi watches them with half lidded eyes, but Jungkook can tell by the smile on his face that he's happy.

 

“Kookie you haven't kissed me yet!!” Hoseok whines.

 

Jungkook looks behind him as best he can, “I did?”

 

Hobi grins, “A _proper_ kiss!”

 

Jungkook hates how easily they can rile him up, but that's what he gets for pining for so long.

 

“Hobi, stop teasing the poor kid,” Yoongi tells him.

 

Jungkook is _so_ thankful for Yoongi.

 

“Aw, hyung, don't act like you don't love how cute his face gets,” Hobi replies.

 

Yoongi hums, “You’re right, but this is cuter.”

 

Yoongi quickly leans forward, and Jungkook feels his hair stand up. He's kissed once more, and this time Yoongi takes his time. He rests a hand on his face, and Jungkook feels like it's hard to breath.

 

They part, Jungkook taking in reel breaths after-

 

Well

 

_That._

 

“See? This is way cuter,” Yoongi says with a glint in his eyes.

 

Jungkook groans, and Hoseok laughs loudly, “Aw c’mon Kookie, you love us.”

 

“Of course I do, that's why I can't stop how you affect me.”

 

The boys are taken aback by how serious his response is, and Jungkook curls in on himself a bit more. God why did he say-

 

Hoseok spins him around and kisses him quickly.

 

“God, Kookie you’re literally killing me,” he mumbles.

 

Jungkook looks into his eyes, “What do you mean hyung?”

 

Hoseok presses kisses all over his face, “You are the cutest bunny I've ever seen, and your adorableness is literally making me scream.”

 

“Hyunggg,” Jungkook whines.

 

“Oh hush, we all know you love being teased by us,” Jin says.

 

Jungkook attempts to bury himself deeper into Hobi, but Jin comes and picks him up.

 

“Alright boys, it's time for breakfast,” Jin says with a smile.

 

It's only then Jungkook registers they only have 4 chairs, and the boy panics.

 

“Oh gosh, sorry, we can uh, we can eat in the living room,” Jungkook tells them.

 

“Oh no it's okay!” Jimin exclaims.

 

Jimin falls down right in Namjoons lap eliciting an ‘oof’ from the later. Jungkook blinks in surprise as Taehyung sits on Yoongi. Hoseok sits down and grins cheekily at the younger. Jungkook flushes once more, and is dragged down.

 

It's not bad or awkward really. Hoseok wraps his arms around the youngest, and hums softly. Jin brings drinks, and sits down in his own chair. Jungkook feels bad that the elder is by himself, but Jin smiles so brightly.

 

Jin notices Jungkook staring and winks, “Don't worry Kookie, you can sit in my lap later.”

 

The youngest chokes, “Jin-hyung!”

 

The others laugh, and Jin blows him a kiss. Jungkook buries his face in his hands, and isn't sure if he’ll be able to handle this constantly.

 

“Relax Kookie, we just can't help but smother you right now,” Jimin tells him.

 

Jungkook has _no_ idea how they just can pick up on thoughts like those.

 

Despite the teasing though, Jungkook feels warm. He loves the attention, and he's never felt so taken care of.

 

The boys eat, and somehow there's no food spilt despite three boys holding people in their laps. They decide to just have a lazy day, and Jungkook melts into them all.

 

He's laying against Jin when the topic is brought up.

 

“Hey Jungkook, there's something I want to talk to you about,” Namjoon tells him.

 

Jungkook looks behind him at the elder taking note of his serious expression. Jungkook prepares himself to help him any way he can. He's always so prepared to do anything for the others. He loves them so much.

 

“You need to stop putting our needs before your own,” he tells him.

 

Jungkook blinks in surprise. He wasn't expecting that, and the question throws him off guard.

 

“And don't try and say you don't know what we're talking about,” Jin mutters behind him.

 

Jungkook chews on his lip, “I- I know that I do it a lot. Too much really, but it's just…”

 

Jungkook swallows thickly, clenching his hands in the process.

 

“I don't know how to _stop_ ,” he whispers.

 

He hears someone shifting, and sees Yoongi sliding towards him. The elder runs a hand through his hair, and hums softly.

 

“And that's okay, you've been doing this for a _long_ time Kook-ah. We don't expect you to get over this quickly,” Yoongi says smiling.

 

“But we’ll be there to remind you, you need to take better care of yourself. Let us know when something is wrong, or if we did something to hurt you,” Hoseok pipes up.

 

Jungkook still looks so unsure, so confused.

 

“It's okay Kookie, you’ll always be our hero, but you don't need to bear all of that by yourself,” Jimin tells him.

 

“Jiminnie is right! We're here to help you, besides we're kind of dating now, so it's kind of mandatory,” Taehyung says with a grin.

 

Jungkook can't help but laugh at that. However he can see how serious they are about this. He knows what he's been doing for a majority of his life isn't healthy, but it's the only thing he's ever known. His priority and job in this world was to look out for the others. It defined him as a person.

 

“I- God this is hard,” Jungkook says.

 

His chest is getting tight again, and he doesn't want to talk about this anymore. But then Yoongi is grabbing his hands, Hoseok is hugging him from behind, and Jin kisses his forehead. Jungkook has to try for them. He will try.

 

“I don't know how to stop, I told you that, but I will try. All I've ever known in life is helping you all. I lived off of making you happy, and for a while it worked…”

 

“But it wasn't _healthy_ ,” Namjoon scolds.

 

Jungkook ducks his head down, “Logically I _know_ that but…”

 

He takes in a deep breath, “It’s the one thing that’s kept me going…”

 

The others go quiet, and Jungkook curls in on himself. He’s made them uncomfortable, and now they're going to leave and-

 

Jungkook’s thoughts are interrupted as Jin pulls him in tighter, and kisses his forehead.

 

“Easy Kookie, I can tell your brain is going into overdrive,” Jin whispers in his ear.

 

Jungkook tries to relax, he really does, but he’s tense and scared and _god_ his chest feels so tight. Jin rubs his hand across his back, and rocks the two slowly. Jungkook clenches his fists into Jin’s shirt, and tries to just breathe. He manages to get his breathing under control, and pulls away.

 

“I’m sorry for being like this,” he says barely above a whisper.

 

“Don’t you _dare_ apologize for this Jungkook,” Hoseok says sternly.

 

Taehyung nods, “Hobi-hyung is right, you don’t ever need to apologize for this. Not only that, but I don’t want you saying something like this about yourself period.”

 

Namjoon slides off the couch and kneels in front of him, “We love you Kook-ah, flaws and all. It’s okay that you’re not perfect, none of us are either.”

 

The leader cards a hand through his own hair, “But I hated seeing you like that, and I don’t ever want something like that to happen. With a relationship like ours we are going to require a lot of communication.”

 

The others nod with their leader, and Jungkook looks away. He fumbles with his hands for a bit before leaning forward and curling himself around Namjoon. In return the elder wraps his body around the boy, trying to protect him from the whole world. The others smile softly, but wait anxiously for Jungkook to talk more about this. When finally the boy leans back, everyone can see how tired he is.

 

“I- I can’t promise you I’ll stop. I will try to, but… It’s just become a second nature for me now,” he says looking up at them.

 

Jimin smiles warmly, “The fact that you’re willing to try is all we need Kookie, we will be here to take care of the rest okay?”

 

Jungkook smiles back, “Thank you, I know you say it’s fine but… just sorry.”

 

Everyone lets out a soft whine for their maknae. They never realized how bad this habit had become for Jungkook. When he confessed to them and almost drowned the others realized there was so much more going on. Only yesterday after their talk did they realize what exactly had happened.

 

Jungkook grew up as a self sacrificing boy.

 

He grew up believing the things happening to him weren’t that bad, and that it was fine if no one knew. He never wants anyone to worry, and back then with everything going on, Jungkook _really_ didn’t want anyone knowing.

 

But the others know now.

 

Jungkook has nothing _left_ to hide,

 

And he’s not sure if that should scare him.

 

The others reel him back in like they always do, and Jungkook stays in the center practically smothered by warm bodies and soft kisses. In that moment with those boys cradling him and holding him tightly, Jungkook thinks maybe he can do this.

 

As long as the others are there to help, Jungkook can do about anything.

 

The rest of the day is much less serious than before. They watch movies for hours, sleep for the rest of the day, and literally cuddle for the rest. Around seven pm Yugyeom comes home. He throws the door open and literally jumps into view.

 

“JUNGKOOK!”

 

It’s only then Yugyeom registers the six other people in the room. He stumbles back, and falls right on his ass.

 

“Holy shit!”

 

The others watch this happen, and Jungkook bursts out laughing. Yugyeom leans up glaring at the other boy.

 

“Asshole,” he mutters.

 

Jungkook roll his eyes, “Oh shut up.”

 

Regardless he stands up, and helps the boy off of the floor. Yugyeom dusts himself off, and looks over Jungkook’s shoulder.

 

“So?” he asks with a grin.

 

Jungkook gives him a look, “I hate you. But you were right…”

 

Yugyeom laughs triumphantly and hugs Jungkook tightly, “See? What did I tell you?!”

 

The others watch this scene unfold, and Jungkook turns to them with a bright smile.

 

“Well, we might need to put the mattresses back now,” he says with a grin.

 

The others smile with him, and Yugyeom looks around at the apartment.

 

“So, I’m assuming everything went well?” he asks.

 

Jungkook nods, “Yeah, it… it went great.”

 

Yugyeom smiles, “I’m glad.”

 

He then turns towards the others, “Now if any of you hurt him, I will not hesitate to _murder_ all of you.”

 

“We wouldn’t even dream of it,” Taehyung says seriously.

 

Yugyeom and Taehyung stares at one another for a moment, and Yugyeom nods. Jungkook furrows his eyebrows at the interaction, but Yugyeom is now turning towards him smiling like an idiot. He bounces on his heels, and Jungkook quirks an eyebrow.

 

“What?”

 

Yugyeom grabs him by the shoulders, “They like me too.”

 

“What? Who are you-”

 

Jungkook cuts off, his eyes widening.

 

“Wait! Wait! You’re serious?!” he exclaims.

 

Yugyeom nods frantically, and Jungkook practically shrieks. He picks Yugyeom up and spins them around laughing.

 

“What is going on?” Jin asks.

 

Yugyeom smiles brightly, “I confessed to my members as well.”

 

Namjoon looks at Yugyeom curiously, “Wait, you mean-”

 

“I confessed that I like everyone in my group!” he chirps.

 

“I was terrified, like honestly I thought I was going to throw up, and honestly at first it didn’t go well,” he tells them, “everyone thought I was just kidding, and got mad at me… but you know me Jungkook I tend to get a little upset over things.”

 

Jungkook nods, “Yeah I know, but we both do.”

 

Yugyeom nods at that, “Yeah but, I got really upset. I started screaming and then god I couldn’t stop crying. That was when the others realized that maybe I wasn’t joking around.”

 

He takes in a deep breath, “That was when Bammie kissed me, and dear god I thought I was going to implode.”

 

Jungkook flushes thinking of last night and just earlier today, and he nods.

 

“I was surprised, I mean who wouldn’t be? But then Jackson came up and explained that they liked me too,” he tells them.

 

“Trust me, I’ve known for _months_ how much Jackson liked you and BamBam,” Namjoon says with a grin.

 

Yugyeom blushes slightly, “Yeah, I uh, I see it now too. But the others joined in as well, and we still have a _lot_ to figure out… but I'm happy.”

 

Jungkook smiles so happily for his friend he knew that Yugyeom struggled just as much, and he was overjoyed for him.

 

The others congratulate the boy, and then help put the mattresses back. Jungkook _really_ doesn't want to say goodbye, but they have classes tomorrow and there's no room.

 

“It's okay Kookie, we’ll see you tomorrow!” Jimin tells him.

 

Taehyung nods, “Absolutely! Me and Jimin will walk you to class okay?”

 

Jungkook pouts but nods anyways. Each boy bids him farewell, and Namjoon pauses turning towards him.

 

“Jungkook, think about what we talked about okay?”

 

The youngest nods, “Okay, hyung… thank you for everything.”

 

Namjoon smiles, “Always Kookie, love you.”

 

Jungkook bids him farewell, and leans against the door after he shuts it. He sighs out peacefully, and Yugyeom looks at him with disgust.

 

“Oh don't look at me like that, you’re going to be just as bad,” he tells him.

 

Yugyeom shrugs, “You’re not wrong, but you are still horribly gross with affection.”

 

The other boy rolls his eyes, and then walks to his room. He collapses on his bed, and focuses on all of the feelings swirling inside of him. It's the first time he's been so happy without any danger hovering over him.

 

He also thinks about what the others said.

 

He's not sure he’ll be able to do it. He's always so used to making sure they're happy, but at the expense of his own needs. He now knows that the others don't like it either, and he wants to try for them.

 

No,

 

For himself.

 

So with a deep breath, Jungkook gets ready for bed. Tomorrow is a new day, and with it comes a lot of new experiences. He has six boyfriends now, and lord knows how hectic that will be.

 

The next morning Jungkook heads to school. He's halfway there when he hears fast steps behind him. He barely has the chance to look behind him when Taehyung leaps onto him. Jungkook stumbles but manages to hold both of them up.

 

“Tae! What are you doing?” He asks.

 

The elder grins, “I told you we would walk you to school.”

 

Jungkook turns to see Jimin skipping towards the pair. Jungkook smiles at the boy, and Jimin grins. He kisses the youngest quickly and then frowns at Tae.

 

“You’re going to make him fall Tae,” he tells him.

 

Taehyung grins, “Are you kidding? There's no way this muscle pig will drop me!”

 

Jungkook laughs, “He has a point Jiminnie, I am quite strong.”

 

The oldest of the trio smacks his arm, “Kookie! Your supposed to agree with me! Also it's _hyung_ to you.”

 

Jungkook smirks, “I thought you didn't want me to?”

 

The other rolls his eyes before pulling him ahead, “Come on we’ll be late.”

 

And just like that they head to class. Taehyung and Jimin drop him off, and Jungkook kisses each of them goodbye. He hears people whispering, but at that moment he doesn't care.

 

Once Jungkook gets out he sees Namjoon waiting for him. The leader looks awkward, his hands stuffed in his pockets, and eyes downcast. Jungkook's heart melts and he slips forward landing a kiss on his cheek.

 

The action startles elder, and he stumbles back. Once he realizes who did it, Namjoon smiles warmly. He wraps an arm around the youngest.

 

“Hello there,” he says smiling.

 

Jungkook grins, “Hi.”

 

They look at each other like a pair of lovestruck idiots, and really that example isn't far off. Namjoon walks him to his next class, which isn’t far from his own, and hugs him tightly.

 

“I’ll see you later okay bunny?” Namjoon says with a smile.

 

Jungkook feels his cheeks light up a red hue, “Okay hyung.”

 

He watches the elder leave, and once more Jungkook is so warm. It can be overwhelming at times, but in the best of ways. The rest of his classes go by smoothly, and this time he waits outside for Hoseok to get out. Jungkook rocks on his heels, and ignores the curious glances from people. When the students start filing out Jungkook waits anxiously for his hyung. Eventually Hoseok walks out with books in his hands.

 

“Hyung!”

 

Hoseok looks up recognizing the voice, and smiles brightly. The maknae waves, and Hoseok pecks him on the cheek.

 

“I feel honored that my precious maknae came to visit!” He says with a laugh.

 

Jungkook chuckles, “Well, I got excited about seeing you all.”

 

Hobi stares at him before pulling him into a side hug.

 

“Aish, you’re too cute Kook-ah,” he tells him.

 

Said boy giggles, and clings to the elder. Since both boys are finished for the day, they wait for the other three to finish. The seven of them decided to hang out for the rest of this week, and Jungkook couldn’t even think about complaining. Besides Yugyeom was in a similar situation too, but he decided to do that on his own.

 

They meet up at Jin’s cafe, and Yoongi is already there working away on his laptop. Jungkook skips over pecking him on the head. The elder looks up, and gives Jungkook his gummy smile. Jin sees them as well, and waves. Jungkook ends up going over to help, and Jin kisses him quickly before attending to a customer.

 

When closing time comes around the other boys help close up, and they all migrate back to Jin’s apartment.

 

Yoongi holds him closely, claiming he didn’t get any alone time with his maknae. Jungkook can’t stop how his face flushes brightly. Yoongi holds him in his lap, and kisses his neck as they wait for Jin to finish making dinner that night. Jungkook melts into the hold, and he can practically _feel_ how Yoongi smirks.

 

“Hyung, _stop_ ,” Jungkook whines.

 

Yoongi laughs, “Stop what baby?”

 

There’s no way that Yoongi _doesn’t_ know what nicknames like that do to him, and Jungkook groans.

 

“Oh leave him be Yoongi.”

 

Jungkook looks up at his savior, Jin, who smiles at the pair cheekily. Jin lifts him up, and they all eat dinner. Jungkook loves Jin’s food, and he finds himself staring at the eldest during the meal. Jin of course notices, and takes the boy’s hand. They stay like that for the rest of the meal, holding hands, and smiling.

 

They watch movies, and everyone crowds around Jungkook. He feels smothered in the best of ways, and Jungkook sighs contently.

 

There will be many nights like these, nights Jungkook will remember for the rest of his life. They are always filled with bright laughs, soft touches, and the quick kisses.

 

There are bad days too of course. With a relationship as big as their own, of course arguments will happen. When days like these come around Jungkook always has a hard time, _especially_ when he’s not the one fighting.

 

“Taehyung stop acting like a spoiled brat!” Yoongi hisses.

 

Taehyung fumes, “Really?! Don’t talk to me like I don’t know anything! Do you realize how hard it is to not see you?!”

 

“It’s not my fault I work Tae!!” he screams back.

 

The others always attempt to control the situation, but they also tend to pick sides as well. Yoongi’s been busy working on a song, but it’s a chance to prove himself worthy for a very nice company. Jungkook’s been rooting for him the whole time, but he also can’t deny how much he misses him. There are times he gets insecure when Yoongi shoves him out, but he won’t ever say anything about it.

 

He’s still too sacrificing.

 

The other boys look to him wondering who he will choose to help, but Jungkook can’t stand it. He’s always tried to give everything he can to support the others, and he doesn’t think it’s possible to pick a side. Which they shouldn’t even be doing in the first place.

 

The screaming match only gets worse however, and the other boys are having a hard time getting it under control.

 

Jungkook starts to feel overwhelmed, and his fists curl up tightly. He should say something, they are really scaring him, but he doesn’t want to make them upset. Right, he should just stay quiet, don’t interfere, keep them happy, but how does he help when they’re fighting?

 

His mind races a hundred miles a minute.

 

He was getting better. Slowly leaning on the others more, letting them know when he was upset. Most days they had to pry it out of him, but he was letting them in more. It’s not something he was used to, but the others stayed. He started putting himself out there but now… God he doesn’t know what to do.

 

“If you’re so unsatisfied with me then fucking break up with me Tae!” Yoongi screams.

 

“Maybe I WILL!” Tae screams back.

 

They all know that neither boy really means what they are saying, but regardless Jungkook feels a pit in his stomach. His chest gets tight, like someone is crushing him, and he knows he needs to get out of there. He steps back, and while the boys are distracted slips out the door. He’s having a panic attack, and his breaths come out ragged and harsh.

 

Jungkook at a last minute effort clicks on Yugyeom’s contact.

 

_“Hello?”_

 

Jungkook heaves out large breaths, “Yugyeom-”

 

_“Woah- hey Kook? What’s going on?”_

 

He clutches at his chest tightly, “The others- Tae and Yoongi- fighting- I can’t _breath_.”

 

Yugyeom curses, _“Okay, Kook? First you need to breath okay? Just like you did with me.”_

 

Jungkook nods even though no one is there to see it, and tries to control his breathing.

 

_“There you go, okay. Now do you want me to come there and get you?”_

 

“I- I should go back and help the others,” he whispers.

 

_“This isn’t about them right now Kook, we talked about this. You need to think for yourself.”_

 

“But-”

 

_“No buts, I’m on my way okay? Just stay there.”_

 

“Okay,” he whispers, “thank you Yugyeom.”

 

_“Always.”_

 

Jungkook goes down away from the apartment, in case someone comes looking for him, but Yugyeom shows up in record time.

 

“That didn’t take long,” Jungkook mutters.

 

The other boy shrugs, “I was in the neighborhood. Come on, let’s get something to eat.”

 

With Jungkook leaning on the others came him leaning on his friends. Yugyeom was always there to help Jungkook. Forced Jungkook to complain to him if the others did something stupid. It was still very hard for Jungkook to tell the others when something bothered him, but with Yugyeom he didn’t have any fear of anger or rejection.

 

Not long after that Jungkook receives a plethora of calls and texts. Yugyeom glares at his phone, and takes it from him.

 

“Jungkook can’t come to the phone right now, hope you jerks appreciate making him upset,” Yugyeom says.

 

“Gyeommie!” Jungkook shrieks.

 

Jungkook wrestles for his phone, and Yugyeom ends up giving up. Jungkook frantically holds it to his ear.

 

“I’m fine! I just-”

 

_“Please don’t lie Kookie.”_

 

It’s Jin on the phone, and Jungkook feels the fight fly out of him. He sags down, and knows that no matter what he says Jin will see right through it.

 

_“Do you want to come back?”_

 

Jungkook pouts, “Have things calmed down?”

 

Jin hums, _“Yeah, Taehyung about had a heart attack when he realized you were missing.”_

 

“Oh,” he mutters feeling guilt swirl inside him.

 

_“I can hear your thoughts Kook-ah, it’s okay, we shouldn’t have let the fight escalate the way it did.”_

 

“Okay, I… I’ll come back.”

 

He hangs up the phone and glares at Yugyeom.

 

“What? Did I lie?” he asks.

 

Jungkook sighs rolling his eyes, “Whatever, I’m going back. Thanks Yugyeom.”

 

The boy bids him farewell, and once again Jungkook finds himself back at the apartment. He wasn’t gone for long, but he needed that break. He knocks so softly, he isn’t sure anyone would hear it, but then Jimin is there holding the door open. Jungkook walks inside staring heatedly at the floor, and Jimin wraps him in a hug.

 

“It’s okay Kookie, were sorry,” he says softly.

 

Jungkook shakes his head, “No it’s okay, I just freaked out. I shouldn’t have, I should’ve-”

 

“Jungkook.”

 

The youngest looks up to see their leader watching him intently, “We’ve talked about this.”

 

Jungkook bites his lip, and follows them to the living room. The other boys look up watching Jungkook intently.

 

Hoseok is the first to sit up, and hug him tightly. Jin follows next, and Jungkook is stuck between the two. He looks up at the two boys who were fighting earlier. Yoongi looks so guilty, and Taehyung looks heartbroken.

 

“Kook-ah,” Yoongi starts, “I’m- we, we’re sorry.”

 

Taehyung sucks in a breath, “I overreacted-”

 

“No you were right I’ve been neglecting you guys-”

 

Jungkook laughs at the change, and breathes deeply, “You know how hard it is for me to open up, but…”

 

He lets out a shaky breath, “But you really scared me, and I _hate_ when you all put me on the spot. It feels like I have to choose between you two, and I _can’t_.

 

“Oh Kookie, we’re sorry, I didn’t realize you felt like that,” Jin tells him.

 

Namjoon hums, “This is why you’ve gotta talk to us Kook. Now we know so we can not do this again, you are extremely important to us. I want you to know that your feelings are just as important as anyone else's.”

 

Jungkook nods wiping at his eyes. Taehyung and Yoongi pull him towards them, and they smother him with apologies and kisses. He relaxes into their hold, and smiles.

 

“Thank you,” he whispers before drifting to sleep.

 

No one is really sure what their maknae is thanking them for, but regardless they smile softly and wish him goodnight.

 

So sure there are fights, but they always talk about them. They try to keep it civilized, and it works. They grow stronger, and more sure about the relationship.

 

As the years go by, Namjoon graduates, and finds a job at a music company alongside Yoongi. Hoseok graduates alongside him, and opens up his own dance studio that Jimin will end up joining later. When Jimin graduates, he helps Hoseok at the studio and teaching the younger children. Taehyung graduates already having so many things planned out for himself. He starts putting out his clothing lines, and people react to them very well.

 

Jungkook’s never been more proud.

 

When he graduates there’s a whole hord of screaming boys, and Jungkook maybe should feel embarrassed.

 

But he couldn’t be more happy.

 

Jungkook works with Jin, but does his art on the side. It’s only later that he gets a job at a video company, that liked his video editing projects.

 

The boys grow up, and as they do they figure out where they want to go. It was decided a long time ago, that they would live together, but it was a matter of when. At first Jungkook was worried about leaving Yugyeom, but he then learns the other boy was planning on leaving as well.

 

The process in finding a home that fits them is difficult, but they succeed. They get two large beds, and manage to fit them in their room. Their home it the place Jungkook feels the safest at. It’s exactly what he pictured in his dreams.

 

“What are you thinking about?”

 

Jungkook looks over his shoulder at Namjoon. He smiles softly, and leans against him.

 

“Nothing much, just the past,” he says quietly.

 

Namjoon wraps his arms around him, “It’s been a long time since then huh?”

 

Jungkook hums quietly, “Yeah, I was so dumb then.”

 

The elder taps him lightly, “Oh hush, we went over that _years_ ago. We were all dumb, it wasn’t a singular person’s fault.”

 

“Yeah, Yeah,” he mutters.

 

“Aish, listen to your hyungs every once in a while!” Namjoon exclaims.

 

Jungkook closes his eyes laughing, and just relaxes against the elder.

 

What Jungkook thought was the most interesting was how the others still had their bad days.

 

And of course Jungkook would _always_ be there to help,

 

But now the others were there to help the others.

 

And to help his bad days too.

 

Hoseok’s bad days didn’t come often, but they still came every once in a while.

 

Jungkook just cuddles the elder, and is always joined by one of the other boys. Hoseok melts into the soft touches, and Jungkook kisses his face softly. The elder knows that Jungkook will always be there to help him, he’s known that for years. Hoseok curls around Jungkook, and the two boys sink into the other. Jimin finds them later, and crashes on top of the pair.

 

Namjoon’s bad days came from stress of his company.

 

Everyone knew Namjoon would send a bit of his money to his mother, and check up on her regularly. He worked twice as hard though, to earn enough for his mother and the group. Everyone tried telling him he didn’t need to, but Namjoon is stubborn. On bad days, Jungkook will lay with him, massage his shoulders, and sing softly. It always calms him down, and Jin is always there to make his favorite dishes.

 

Taehyung’s bad days normally came at night.

 

Some nights Taehyung would wake up, a scream on the edge of his tongue. Jungkook always laid beside Tae, so on nights like these Jungkook is startled awake every time. He always drags Taehyung into his arms. Whispers words of love and security, until the other boy realizes where he is. Without fail Taehyung will lean back, and smile brightly at Jungkook. There were even nights Yoongi would wake up first to help, or nights when they all woke up.

 

Yoongi’s bad days came slowly.

 

They never started off bad, but slowly throughout the day it would just get worse and worse. Most days the others could catch a bad day early on, but other times it would just fester until Yoongi was going to burst. Jungkook always stayed with the elder, and stayed quiet. Everyone knew too much noise would make the elder mad, so Jungkook stayed silent. He would work on his projects quietly, and wait for the elder to talk. Namjoon would normally be there before Jungkook, and they always smiled in a silent agreement.

 

Jin’s bad days came all too sudden.

 

Jin had no idea when a bad day would come, but when it did _everyone_ knew. Jin gets stressed to a point of exhaustion, and it worries the others. Sometimes it’s due to him seeing a family member, other times it’s just stress. But Jin would fume around the house, snap easily, and feel so guilty over it later. Jungkook tends to stay quiet around Jin as well, and just holds him. There are days Jin tries to push him off, but Jungkook is strong. He doesn’t let go, and Jin knows he’s done for once Taehyung wraps around them like an octopus.

 

Jimin’s bad days are quiet.

 

It’s days that seem completely normal, that Jimin will get insecure. Normally someone is always available to give him that comfort, but there are other day they can’t. Days like those he feels terribly insecure, and will go into a reclusive state. Once Jungkook notices, he always drags the elder out for food to make sure he eats, and then will cuddle with him. Hoseok tends to join them later on, and they’ll watch movies for hours.

 

Jungkook’s bad days…

 

His bad days come from a blockage he tends to put down.

 

They always consist of a ton of negative feelings he’s had build up, until he feels the glass tip.

 

It’s always comes out as a rush of feelings, and he tries desperately hard to hide it.

 

The others are always there to pry himself out of it though.

 

Once a bad day presents itself, everyone understands. They’ll ask him what brought this on, and why he didn’t come to them sooner. He still struggles of course, but the others always coax him back. They hold him close, and Jungkook remembers the time he first felt them hold him. The way Jin’s lips feel on his forehead, how Yoongi’s voice always brings him comfort, how Hoseok’s hugs make him feel so warm, how Namjoon’s large hand brush through his hair, how Jimin tangles their limbs together, and how Taehyung’s smile always gets him to relax.

 

They help him through it, and Jungkook never knew it was possible for bad days to be so easy.

 

Jungkook learns about so many things with the others. He feels stronger with them, strong enough that even when he sees his parents he remains strong.

 

At least for the interaction he had with them.

 

The others always say it’s okay for him to come to them for comfort after all.

 

Jungkook learns how to let go, and the others guide him through it. Their relationship isn’t normal by any means, but that doesn’t stop him from proposing to all of them later on. It’s a crazy event, and no one expects it. The youngest gets very shy, but the others are always there to drive away any doubts.

 

Of course legally they can’t get married, but in their hearts they are.

 

There’s one day, when the others have nothing to do, and Jungkook is reading against Namjoon. He looks up at the others. He sees Taehyung laughing with Hoseok at some video, he watches Jin cook in the kitchen with Jimin singing to him, he then locks eyes with Yoongi who smiles softly.

 

Days like these are his favorite, even if they aren’t doing anything at all.

 

As he reads Jungkook comes across a word that’s in english.

 

“Namjoon-hyung?”

 

The elder looks down, “What is it Kook-ah?”

 

Jungkook frowns pulling the book up, “What does this word say?”  


Namjoon reads it before huffing out a laugh.

 

“What?” the maknae asks.

 

“It’s nothing just- That word it says ‘selfless’,” he tells him.

 

“Selfless?” Jungkook asks, saying the english word quietly.

 

“Concerned more with the needs and wishes of others than with one's own,” Namjoon tells him.

 

Yoongi snorts, “How fitting.”

 

Jungkook furrows his eyebrows, “I don’t get it, why is it fitting.”  


The boys look to each other before Taehyung looks at him grinning.

 

“Because that’s you, Kook!”

 

Jungkook looks at him intently, before looking down at the word.

 

_‘Selfless’_

 

Maybe that is him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And thus brings our story to an end. I hope you all enjoyed this, and I also hope you'll stick around for future stories. I already have another one set up.

**Author's Note:**

> More chapters will be added later.


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